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How to Talk to Anyone 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships (Leil Lowndes) (z-lib.org)

See You at the Big One!
While you’re at it, don’t forget to grill your informant for special
insider greetings to use when you’re with their gang. For example,
actresses cringe if they hear “good luck” before a show, but they
smile at well-wishers who say “Break a leg!”
“Break a leg,” however, is not appropriate for runners before
a marathon. That’s the last thought they want to have! The only
thing they want to break is their personal record. Try “Have a per-
sonal best!”
Firefighters who work on shift seldom see each other except,
of course, at the biggest blazes. Thus the firefighters’ greeting “See
ya at the big one!”
Once, driving in a sleepy town you’d have to work at getting
lost in, I succeeded. I was hopelessly turned around. Happily, I
spotted the firehouse and a couple of bored firefighters lounging
out front.
“Excuse me, can you tell me the way back to Route 50?” I
called out the window. I could tell from their attitude they thought
I was an idiot. Nevertheless, they lethargically pointed me in the
right direction. As I drove off, I called out, “Thanks guys, see ya
at the big one!” In the rearview mirror I saw huge smiles break out
on their faces as they stood up in unison and waved good-bye. The
disoriented dizzy blond driving off had won their respect with
their insider salute.
156
How to Talk to Anyone
04 (143-170B) part four 8/14/03 9:18 AM Page 156


157
How to Secretly Learn
About Their Lives

41
Let’s say your paper carrier has just hurled the newspaper from his
bike to your front door. You pour a cup of coffee and get com-
fortable to catch up on what’s happening in the world. Your world,
that is. Do you flip first to the international news? The fashion sec-
tion? The sports page? The entertainment section? Maybe the
comics?
Whichever section you usually flip to first, tomorrow DON’T.
Turn to any other section, preferably one you hardly ever read.
Why? Because it will familiarize you with other worlds so that you
can soon discuss anything with anybody, no matter how little you
have in common.
How about the real estate section? Yawn. Maybe you don’t
find real estate especially engrossing. However, sooner or later
you’re going to find yourself with a group of people who are dis-
cussing properties, deals, and today’s market. Scanning the real
estate section just once every few weeks will keep you au courant
with their conversation.
The advertising column? Maybe you think the world would
be a far, far better place without Madison Avenue. But your bot-
tom line won’t be better off if you can’t hold your own discussing
matters with the marketing maven you’ve just contracted to adver-
04 (143-170B) part four 8/14/03 9:18 AM Page 157
Copyright 2003 by Leil Lowndes. Click Here for Terms of Use.


158
How to Talk to Anyone
tise your company’s widgets. Just a few peeks at the advertising
news section and you’ll soon be chatting about campaigns and cre-
ative people, and doing print or TV. Instead of saying 
words
, you’ll
be saying 
copy
. Instead of the 
agency
, you’ll be bandying about real
insider terms like the 
shop
.
Using outsider words is one of the biggest giveaways that you
are not in the know. On the ship, if a passenger asked any of my
staff, “How long have you been working on the boat?” they’d
squelch a groan. Cruise staffers proudly worked on a ship, and the
word 
boat
revealed the passenger as a real landlubber.
The right word can perform conversational miracles. In the
receiving line, whenever passengers asked our laconic captain,
“When did you first become a master?” or “What was your first
command?” he would hold up the entire line of people snaking
around the ballroom waiting to shake his hand. Captain Cafiero
would enthusiastically recount his naval history to the savvy
inquirer who might have just learned the words 
master
or 
com-
mand
last week in the newspaper shipping notices. (If the passen-
ger had simply said, “How long have you been a captain?” or
“What was your first boat?” he or she would have gotten the cap-
tain’s usual Italian gentleman’s version of the bum’s rush.)
Soon you’ll become addicted to the high that establishing rap-
port with so many people gives you. All it takes is reading differ-
ent sections of the newspaper.

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