Pilot S00E01 Good News, Bad News

128. S07E18 - The Friars Club

Guest Stars: Rob Schneider (Bob) Pat Cooper (Himself) Samantha Smith (II) (Hallie) Lisa Kushell (Connie) Robert Martin Robinson (Maitre 'd) Norman Large (Detective) Peggy Lane (Waitress) The Flying Karamazov Brothers (The Flying Sandos Brothers) Heidi Swedberg (Susan) John O'Hurley (Peterman) Phil Morris (Jackie Chiles)

George is happy because he has a three-month reprieve. The wedding is delayed until June (just in time for the end of the May sweeps and a cliffhanger!). Meanwhile he is also excited because Jerry is going to go out with Susan's best friend. He envisions their friendship in the future as being "Gatsby"-like. Jerry is trying to get into the Friars Club, but loses a jacket he "borrowed" for dinner there, at a performance of comedic jugglers that was "worked on" by Susan's friend. Kramer tries to duplicate the sleeping patterns of Da Vinci and falls asleep at some inopportune moments; one of which puts him put in the Hudson River. Peterman hires a deaf employee and Elaine suffers the consequences, when she gets loaded with some of his work. Trying to see how deaf he really is, Elaine comes on to him, which Peterman overhears and tries to help out their budding relationship.

b: 07-Mar-96 pc: 718 w: David Mandel d: Andy Ackerman

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129. S07E19 - The Wig Master

Guest Stars: Patrick Bristow (Wig Master (Ethan)) Harry Van Gorkum (Craig) Gina Mastrogiacomo (Prostitute) Kim Chase (Charmaine) Chaim Jeraffi (Jiffy Park Guy) Michael James McDonald (Jesse) Pamela Dillman (Salesperson) Zack Phifer (Bob) Shashi Bhatia (Flower Girl) Norman Brenner (Ian) Heidi Swedberg (Susan)

Jerry uses Elaine to prove that a sales clerk is wrong about his looking at an expensive jacket. Elaine is picked up by the clerk. George has an unwanted house guest, a wig master for the touring company of "Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat." He also has found a parking lot that charges $75 dollars a month; Kramer decides to put his car there. Unfortunately, he leaves his apartment key there. When he can't get his key, he is allowed to borrow a pink Cadillac. Jerry is convinced the clerk is working Elaine. George discovers why the lot is so cheap, he finds a used condom in his car and is asking a prostitute for information, just as Susan approaches. George discovers that he may have an out with Susan; she says she must be able to trust him and have no doubts. Kramer stays at Jerry's apartment. Elaine has a walking stick she lets Kramer have. Jerry tries to return his jacket, but discovers that "spite" isn't a viable reason. Kramer is allowed to borrow the back up "Electric Color Dreamcoat." Jerry is put out, when both sexes assume he isn't in a relationship with the person he is with (Elaine in one instance, the Wig Master in the other). Kramer finds a fuzzy white hat. With all the parts put together, his new ensemble is a sight to behold, just ask the NYPD after he is caught pulling a prostitute out of his borrowed car.

b: 04-Apr-96 pc: 719 w: Spike Feresten d: Andy Ackerman

NOTE: Kramer's mug shot number is NYPD 331781-0404.
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130. S07E20 - The Calzone

Guest Stars: John D'Aquino (Todd) Peter Allas (Counter Guy) Danette Tays (Nicki) Greg Collins (Policeman) Jane A. Johnston (Todd's Mother) Wayne Knight (Newman)

George becomes Steinbrenner's pet, when he shares an eggplant calzone with him. Kramer is raving about wearing clothes "straight out of the dryer." Jerry thinks that Elaine's boyfriend is dating her without really ever asking her out. He offers to bring Jerry some Cuban cigars from Canada. Jerry takes advantage of his girlfriend's ability to get anything she wants. Kramer searches for quarters for the dryer; when he can't find anymore, he starts using an oven. George gets into tip trouble with the counter guy at the calzone shop and he works out an arrangement with Newman. That is unless of course it's raining (Newman doesn't deliver mail in the rain); Kramer helps out.

b: 25-Apr-96 pc: 720 w: Alec Berg & Jeff Schaffer d: Andy Ackerman

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131. S07E21 - The Bottle Deposit (1)

Guest Stars: Brad Garrett (Tony) Brenda Strong (Sue Ellen) Patrick Kerr (Clerk) Harvey Jason (Auctioneer) Larry Polson (Homeless Guy) Wayne Knight (Newman) Richard Herd (Wilhelm) John O'Hurley (Peterman)

George doesn't hear the details on an important project that Wilhelm wants him to champion. Peterman wants Elaine to bid on a set of golf clubs at the Kennedy auction, her ceiling is $10,000; however, she gets into a bidding war with Sue Ellen, the Oh Henry! candy heiress. Consequently, she spends a bit more than she was authorized. Newman finds the missing ingredient to make it cost effective in Kramer's scheme to collect used pop bottles and cans and take them to Michigan where the refund is doubled. Jerry takes his car to a mechanic, who's fanatical about car care. Elaine meets Jerry to get the golf clubs out of his car, but the mechanic, distraught over Jerry's negligence, steals it. Kramer and Newman collect their bottles and cans and hit the road in a mail truck.

b: 02-May-96 pc: 721 w: Gregg Kavet & Andy Robin d: Andy Ackerman

NOTE: Originally broadcast as part of a 60 min episode.
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132. S07E22 - The Bottle Deposit (2)
Guest Stars: Brad Garrett (Tony) Mary Jo Keenen (Deena) Rance Howard (Farmer) Nicholas Mele (Detective) Karen Lynn Scott (Farmer's Daughter) Sandy Ward (Pop) Dan O'Connor (Young Cop) Bonnie McNeil (Woman) Wayne Knight (Newman) Richard Herd (Wilhelm) John O'Hurley (Peterman)
Wilhelm is delighted with the job George did on the project; however, he has no idea what he did or how he did it. The detective on the case thinks he's found Jerry's car, damaged beyond recognition. It's not, and later Jerry's mechanic calls him from the car. Kramer spots Jerry's car in Ohio. Steinbrenner calls George into his office about the project report and has him committed. Kramer ditches the cans, bottles, mailbags and Newman in pursuit of Jerry's car. Newman finds a farmer's house, complete with the proverbial daughter. The mechanic throws the clubs and bag at Kramer's truck, allowing him to get away. Deena is happy to see that George is getting the help he needs. Peterman is stunned when he finally gets the clubs, "Elaine, I never knew Kennedy had such a temper."

b: 02-May-96 pc: 722 w: Gregg Kavet & Andy Robin d: Andy Ackerman

NOTE: Originally broadcast as part of a 60 min episode.
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133. S07E23 - The Wait Out

Guest Stars: Cary Elwes (David) Debra Messing (Beth) Allan Havey (Policeman) Diana Castle (Mrs. Zanfino) Todd Bosley (Joey) J.C. Hertzler (Mr. Berger) Nicole Tocantins (Barbara) Heidi Swedberg (Susan) Danny Woodburn (Mickey)

After George makes an off-hand remark to a married couple with a rocky relationship, Jerry and Elaine wait in anticipation of their inevitable separation. Elaine sports a new hairstyle, starts driving again and almost makes Jerry car sick. Kramer starts wearing jeans again. The jeans are much too tight, so tight in fact, that he can't get them off when he really needs to. Elaine and Jerry make plans to move in on the separated couple, which they do. George feels guilty about breaking up the marriage and wishes to undo the damage. Jerry and Elaine physically oppose this action. David returns the off-hand remark to George in the presence of Susan. She tells George she has to think about some things- he thinks it is his ticket out.

b: 09-May-96 pc: 723 w: Peter Mehlman s: Peter Mehlman & Matt Selman d: Andy Ackerman

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134. S07E24 - The Invitations

Guest Stars: Janeane Garofalo (Jeannie Steinman) Stephen Root (Mr. Lager) Victor Raider-Wexler (Doctor) John Riggi (Teller) Sue Goodman (Clerk) Julie Clark (Waitress) Fred Goehner (Delivery Guy) Heidi Swedberg (Susan)

As the big day grows nearer, George and Susan order their invitations. Susan lets him choose the cheap ones. George tries to think of a way out. Elaine suggests smoking and Kramer suggests a pre-nuptial agreement. Jerry, thinking of a single future with Kramer, nearly gets hit by a car but is saved by his female equivalent, Jeannie. Jerry thinks he is in love with Jeannie. Kramer tries to cash in on a bank's offer of a $100 if one of their tellers doesn't say hello. Is "Hey," hello? George tries the suggestions and strikes out. Susan begins preparing the invitations. Jerry makes a decision. Susan passes out while licking envelopes. Jerry proposes marriage; later he has second thoughts. George finds Susan and the gang meets him over at the hospital, where George gets the news, he's out. Free at last, George makes another attempt at Marisa Tomei.

b: 16-May-96 pc: 724 w: Larry David d: Andy Ackerman

NOTE: In an uncredited appearance writer / producer Carol Leifer appears as one of the bank employees. The scenes shot with the real George Steinbrenner for this episode, were cut from the final edit. It is reported that these scenes might be included in an episode, next season. Steinbrenner reportedly missed opening day of the Yankees' baseball season to make this appearance.

ALSO NOTE: "Is Seinfeld the Best Comedy Ever? A Case is Made" was the title of a TV Guide cover story for the week of June 1st through the 7th. This link should take you to the on-line version. In the article Jay McInerney, the author, makes his case for why he thinks it should be. I for one, agree. He also lists out ten of the most significant episodes."The Pen" "The Bubble Boy" "The Pick" "The Parking Garage" "The Junior Mint" "The Subway" "The Outing" "The Soup Nazi" "The Rye" "The Contest"

In another article, Jerry talks about next season, future seasons and the impact of Larry David's departure.

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Season 8
135. S08E01 - The Foundation
Guest Stars: Janeane Garofalo (Jeannie Steinman) Bruce Davison (Wyck) Grace Zabriskie (Mrs. Ross) Warren Frost (Mr. (Henry) Ross) Joe Urla (Dugan) Susan Walters (Dolores "Mulva") Todd Bosley (Joey) Diana Castle (Mrs. Zanfino) Stuart Quan (Sensei) Herb Mitchell (Businessman #1) Robert Louis Kempf (Businessman #2) Lawrence A. Mandley (Larry) Lauren Bowles (Waitress #1) Peggy Lane (Waitress #2) Paige Tamada (Clara) Robert Padnick (Willie) Ruth Cohen (Ruthie) John O'Hurley (Peterman)
Months after her death, George is ready to move on, but Susan's parents want to keep her memory alive. Kramer becomes a karate master, where his opponents are equals in his skill level, but are lacking in size. Jerry runs into Dolores, you remember "her name rhymed with a female body part" in "The Junior Mint", she suggests that they get together again. Peterman has a breakdown and goes to Burma leaving Elaine in charge; a position she is reluctant to assume. Kramer makes a speech that inspires Elaine to go and take charge of J. Peterman. Inspired by a comment that Jerry made, a foundation is established in Susan's name, which will take up all of George's free time. Jerry and Dolores do get together; however, when she hears why Jerry's engagement was broken off, she leaves commenting that he still hasn't matured. Elaine sees Kramer's opponents, vents her frustration and takes him down in front of the class. Jerry decides to research breakups and the effect on future relationships. Kramer's classmates meet him after class. George discovers everything he lost when he lost Susan.

b: 19-Sep-96 pc: 801 w: Alec Berg & Jeff Schaffer d: Andy Ackerman

NOTE: This episode was dedicated "In Memory of Our Friend Marjorie Gross." Marjorie died from ovarian cancer earlier this year at the age of 40, in previous seasons, Marjorie was one of show's producers and writers. She was responsible for "The Secretary", "The Fusilli Jerry", "The Understudy" and "The Shower Head." During her battle early in 1996 she wrote an article titled "Cancer Becomes Me" for The New Yorker magazine on what it is like to be dying from the disease. Thanks to Jerry Balsam, Vince Gargiulo and Kenny Kramer for the information on Marjorie's article. Marjorie also wrote some episodes of the early 1980's comedy Square Pegs.

Viewer Mike Hamilin notes that Kramer gets beat up by the kids in much the same way (and perhaps the same set) as he did with the AIDS' walkers in "The Sponge".

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136. S08E02 - The Soul Mate

Guest Stars: Bruce Davison (Wyck) Tim DeKay (Kevin) Lisa Mende (Carol) Kim Myers (Pam) Rende Rae Norman (Ms. Baines) Tommy Hicks (Mr. Cross) Jill Talley (Gail) Jill Holden (Lisa) Wayne Knight (Newman)

George thinks the foundation lawyer thinks he might have killed Susan, Jerry suggests using a method employed by Jerry Lewis to find out. Kramer falls for Jerry's girlfriend and he consults Newman for advice. Elaine's friends insist that she have a baby, she'd rather not and meets a man who shares her ideals. George leaves a running tape recorder in his brief case at the next board meeting and leaves the room. He returns to find the briefcase damaged and the tape stopped. Newman gets in the middle of Jerry and Kramer's relationship with Pam; he bribes Jerry in hopes to find out more about his obsession, Elaine. Meanwhile, her new boyfriend gets a vasectomy to show her how committed he is to not having children. The guys find out Pam isn't interested in having children and they line up for their own vasectomies. George gets to the bottom of what happened to his briefcase.

b: 26-Sep-96 pc: 802 w: Peter Mehlman d: Andy Ackerman

NOTE: This episode was dedicated "In Memory of Our Friend Victor Wayne Harris." Vince Gargiulo tells me that Victor was the assistant prop master for the series and he died in August following a stroke.
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137. S08E03 - The Bizarro Jerry

Guest Stars: Tim DeKay (Kevin) Kristin Bauer (Gillian) Pat Kilbane (Bizarro Kramer (Feldman)) Kyle T. Hefner (Bizarro George (Gene)) Justina Vail (Amanda) J. Patrick McCormack (Leland) Harry Murphy (Office Manager) Dana Patrick (Model #1) Shireen Crutchfield (Model #2) Robin Nance (Model #3) Mark S. Larson (Bizarro Newman (Vargas)) James Lesure (Office Worker) Jason Beck (Bouncer)

Kramer uses a bathroom in an office building and just begins working there. He is "TCB." Elaine sets Jerry up with a friend who is very beautiful, but she has "man hands." George uses a picture of her and passes her off as his dead finance Susan; that gets him into the "Forbidden City" where high priced models hang out. Elaine meets Kevin and some of his friends; they are the exact opposite of Jerry, George and Kramer. With Kramer working, George inside the walls and Elaine hanging out with Kevin, Jerry begins to feel alone.

b: 03-Oct-96 pc: 803 w: David Mandel d: Andy Ackerman

NOTE: Viewers Taylor Lasseigne and Michael Haemlin note in this episode that Kramer is seen working in this episode to the music of Sheena Easton's hit "My Baby Takes the Morning Train" was also used in "The Voice". Mike also notes that George uses "Vandelay" in this episode in his trick to show the picture of his deceased "fiance" to the beautiful receptionist.
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138. S08E04 - The Little Kicks

Guest Stars: Neil Giuntoli (Brody) Rebecca McFarland (Anna) Joseph Urla (Dugan) Tim O'Hare (Vendor) Jerry Stiller (Frank)

Elaine reluctantly lets George attend a party she is throwing at work. "Sweet fancy Moses" exclaims George when he sees Elaine dance at a party she's holding for her employees. She wonders why they've lost respect for her. Jerry gets 2 tickets to a premiere of a film. Kramer asks him to get an extra ticket for his friend Brody. Elaine thinks the loss of respect might be due to George's influence, so she makes him off limits to Anna, one of the women George talked to at the party. That "bad boy" image makes him all the more desirable. Jerry and Kramer attend the film with Brody, who begins to make a bootleg tape. Brody gets sick and has Kramer take him home, leaving Jerry to finish making the tape. Jerry worries about the implications when Brody likes him camera work and asks him to do another film. However, he complains about the quality of Kramer's work. Elaine finds out the truth about her dancing after she tapes herself. Elaine apologizes to Anna and George, which suddenly makes him undesirable. Brody won't meet Jerry's demands for equipment; George takes on the challenge, but gets arrested. Frank comes to bail him out and Elaine lets him know the truth about his son. Elaine's dance becomes a big hit on the streets of New York.

b: 10-Oct-96 pc: 804 w: Spike Feresten d: Andy Ackerman

NOTE: It was reported in Allure magazine that the dance moves Elaine made were completely Lorne Michaels (noted Saturday+Night+Live producer) own moves.
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139. S08E05 - The Package

Guest Stars: Richard Roat (Dr. Berg) Fort Atkinson (Dr. Stern) David Purdham (Dr. Resnick) Heather Campbell (Sheila) Ramon Franco (Mailman) Bari K. Willerford (Ron) Shuko Akune (Receptionist) F. William Parker (Country Doctor) Lynn A. Henderson (Clerk) Bill Gratton (Postal Official) Susan Leslie (Nurse) Wayne Knight (Newman) Len Lesser (Uncle Leo)

Elaine has a rash and looks for a doctor who will treat her; despite her doctor -- patient relationship reputation. Kramer offers Jerry a method to get a refund on his stereo that is two years out of warranty. George discovers the woman at the photo store is looking at his pictures. Jerry refuses delivery of a package with no return address. George thinks that the photo store clerk has stuck a revealing picture of herself in with his pictures. Kramer convinces George to return the compliment and offers to take the photos. Uncle Leo signs for Jerry's package. Elaine tries to lift her medical records. Jerry lets Uncle Leo open the package and there is the sound of an explosion. Leo's stove has exploded but eventually Jerry gets the package and opens it up. It contains his stereo in pieces. Kramer sent the package to him insured; now all they must do is collect the insurance money from the post office. Elaine poses as Uncle Leo's nurse to try a diagnosis for her condition. When that doesn't work she tries to get Kramer to lift her records. Newman grills Jerry on suspicion of mail fraud. George drops off his film at the photo store and gets a surprising result.

b: 17-Oct-96 pc: 805 w: Jennifer Crittenden d: Andy Ackerman

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140. S08E06 - The Fatigues

Guest Stars: Joseph Urla (Dugan) Ned Bellamy (Eddie) A.J. Langer (Abby) Katie Layman (Cynthia) Eddie Allen (Doctor) Gwen McGee (Janine) Lynn Manning (Blind Man) Estelle Harris (Estelle) Jerry Stiller (Frank) Richard Herd (Wilhelm) Steve Hytner (Bania)

Jerry is intrigued by the concept of his girlfriend having a mentor. George prepares to give a lecture on risk management by reading a book, but realizes that book on tape have spoiled him. Elaine prepares to fire an employee, but when face to face with him, she promotes him. Kramer runs a Jewish singles night at Frank's Knights of Columbus hall. Jerry meets his girlfriend's mentor, but she is dating Kenny Bania. George discovers the blind can get any book on tape, so he plans to fail an eye test. Elaine's recently promoted employee has some startling new ideas. She plans to promote him again. Kramer's party plans go awry when he has to cook for over 150 plus people. He needs to get Frank's advice on cooking for the masses, despite George's warning. Elaine's promotional plan backfires, when the rest of her staff quits. Jerry's girlfriend sees Bania's act and loses respect for her mentor. Elaine tries working with her employee. George figures out an angle to get his book read. Jerry finds himself becoming Bania's mentor. Jerry and his now ex-girlfriend get their files mixed up; George speaks on Ovaltine and Bania on risk management. Frank's cooking skills are reborn, until he sees someone choking.

b: 31-Oct-96 pc: 806 w: Gregg Kavet & Andy Robin d: Andy Ackerman

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141. S08E07 - The Checks

Guest Stars: James Patrick Stuart (Brett) Gedde Watanabe (Mr. Oh) Sab Shimono (Executive #1) John Bowman (Teddy) Jock Plotnick (Crew Leader) George Wallace (Doctor) Toshi Toda (Mr. Tanaka) Goh Misawa (Mr. Yamaguchi) Tony V. (Clicky) Akane Nelson (Executive #2) Cherie Hankal (Nurse) Richard Herd (Wilhelm)

Elaine's new boyfriend, Brett, is obsessed with designer furniture and the song "Desperado." Jerry spots an umbrella salesman using the sales technique he invented. The salesman says it was someone else. Hundreds of twelve-cent royalty checks keep arriving from Jerry's brief appearance on a Japanese television. Kramer warns George that the carpet cleaners he hired are actually a front for a religious cult. Intrigued, George tries to be converted, but they're not interested. Kramer meets some Japanese businessman and he takes them on the town and to the cleaners. He is a little confused about the exchange rate. Brett delivers a large chest of drawers to Kramer and thinks that Jerry might be jealous. Kramer thinks the TV pilot that Jerry and George did would be perfect for Japanese television. They pitch it to a couple of Japanese TV executives. Elaine tries to find a song that she and Brett can share. Kramer puts his Japanese friends up at his place. They're sleeping in the chest of drawers. Jerry caught in the rain meets the man in the street that claims credit for the twirl. He also meets Brett who is convinced Jerry is down on his luck. George gets the cleaners to do the offices at Yankee Stadium where they find a new recruit. Because of the humidity from the hot tub, Kramer's guests get stuck in the chest. Jerry, with writer's cramp from check signing, uses a fire ax to open the chest. That scares the Japanese guests and injures Brett who passes out.

b: 07-Nov-96 pc: 807 w: Steve O'Donnell and Tom Gammill & Max Pross d: Andy Ackerman

NOTE: Viewer Tony Antoniou notes that the person playing Carl Farbman shown in the red Ferrari was the Transportation Coordinator for the show, Dave Pierce.
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142. S08E08 - The Chicken Roaster

Guest Stars: Mark Roberts (Seth) Kymberly Kalil (Heather) Michael D. Roberts (Ipswich) Wesley Leong (Clerk) Christopher Aguilar (Burmese Boy) Wayne Knight (Newman) John O'Hurley (Peterman)

Kenny Rogers Roasters opens in the neighborhood and the large neon chicken sign beams right into Kramer's apartment window. Jerry meets an old college buddy who he talks into missing a meeting that it turns out was important enough to get him fired. Elaine makes liberal use of the Peterman expense account. Including a big hat for George, that he tries leaving at the saleswoman's apartment in an attempt to get a second date with her. Elaine tries to justify her expenses to the accounting department and needs the hat. Jerry's college friend becomes "manager" of the chicken place. Kramer and Jerry switch apartments; however, more than just the apartment gets switched. Newman gets Kramer hooked on Kenny's chicken. Elaine brings George to the saleswoman's apartment, dragging George by the ear, in an attempt to retrieve the hat. Jerry's "friend" Bob sells fake Russian hats, but it doesn't help Elaine. Jerry demands his apartment back when he finds out Kramer is hooked. Elaine goes to Burma in search of Peterman to get her expenses authorized. George keeps scheming to get that second date. The fake Russian hat has an impact on the chicken business.

b: 14-Nov-96 pc: 808 w: Alec Berg & Jeff Schaffer d: Andy Ackerman

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