Mindset : The New Psychology of Success pdfdrive com

The Dilemma.
Imagine you’re a nice, caring person—as you probably are—usually.
You  love  your  spouse  and  feel  lucky  to  have  them  as  your  partner.  But  when
they violate one of your rules, like letting the garbage overflow before taking it
out,  you  feel  personally  betrayed  and  start  criticizing.  It  begins  with  “I’ve  told
you a thousand times,” then moves on to “You never do anything right.” When
they  still  don’t  seem  properly  ashamed,  you  flare,  insulting  their  intelligence
(“Maybe you aren’t smart enough to remember garbage”) and their character (“If
you  weren’t  so  irresponsible,  you  wouldn’t…”  “If  you  cared  about  anyone  but
yourself,  you’d…”).  Seething  with  rage,  you  then  bring  in  everything  you  can
think  of  to  support  your  case:  “My  father  never  trusted  you,  either,”  or  “Your

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boss  was  right  when  he  said  you  were  limited.”  Your  spouse  has  to  leave  the
premises to get out of range of your mounting fury.