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Part III
Topics in Separation, Visitation, and Reunification
or her own sexuality. In a like manner, a child’s traumatic separation
from a parent will sometimes reappear only when that person becomes
a parent him- or herself.
The psychoanalytic literature refers to these landmines as
superego
lacunae
. For present purposes, imagine that childhood trauma leaves
one or more of the steps in the staircase of development loose or rotten
or otherwise flawed. When that child walks back up the same staircase
vicariously with his or her own child, the pair fall through, recreating
the intergenerational cycle.
The literature on vulnerability and resilience (e.g., Garmezy, 1985;
Maddi, 2002; Masten, 1999, 2002; Rutter, 2007; also see chapter 7)
teaches us that children who experience trauma and loss have a greater
likelihood of healthy outcomes if they have at least one stable attachment
figure through it all. This is one strong argument for providing children
who are at high risk for abuse and neglect, social service removal,
interim care, and permanency planning the opportunity to engage in
a supportive psychotherapy that spans the entire process. This therapy
is often referred to as a “port in the storm” for the child.
In this age of managed health care and of cognitive-behavioral and
“evidence-based” interventions (e.g., O’Donohue & Fisher, 2006), the
psychotherapist’s goal is efficiency. This is a very effective and practi-
cally desirable approach when the problem is well-defined. Many forms
of anxiety, some forms of depression, and specific behavioral problems
(e.g., bedwetting) can benefit quickly with lasting results.
However, research finds, time and again, across cultures and genera-
tions, modalities of service and presenting problems, that the effective
component of any psychotherapy is the relationship itself.
It is a tragedy of our cost-conscious, efficiency-minded world that
children who are enduring trauma seldom have the opportunity to estab-
lish and maintain a long-term psychotherapeutic relationship intended
largely to anchor them through the process. This kind of “port in the
storm” relationship can be the difference between dysfunction that
leads to underachievement, under- or unemployment, failed intimate
relationships, inappropriate parenting, and their associated costs on one
hand and healthy outcomes on the other (Laursen & Birmingham, 2003).
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