Real Freedom
The only true form of freedom, the only ethical form of freedom, is through self-limitation. It is
not the privilege of choosing everything you want in your life, but rather, choosing what you will
give up in your life.
This is not only real freedom, this is the only freedom. Diversions come and go. Pleasure
never lasts. Variety loses its meaning. But you will always be able to choose what you are
willing to sacrifice, what you are willing to give up.
This sort of self-denial is paradoxically the only thing that expands real freedom in life. The
pain of regular physical exercise ultimately enhances your physical freedom—your strength,
mobility, endurance, and stamina. The sacrifice of a strong work ethic gives you the freedom to
pursue more job opportunities, to steer your own career trajectory, to earn more money and the
benefits that come with it. The willingness to engage in conflict with others will free you to talk
to anyone, to see if they share your values and beliefs, to discover what they can add to your life
and what you can add to theirs.
You can become freer right now simply by choosing the limitations you want to impose on
yourself. You can choose to wake up earlier each morning, to block your email until
midafternoon each day, to delete social media apps from your phone. These limitations will free
you because they will liberate your time, attention, and power of choice. They treat your
consciousness as an end in itself.
If you struggle to go to the gym, then rent a locker and leave all your work clothes there so
you have to go each morning. Limit yourself to two to three social events each week, so you are
forced to spend time with the people you care about most. Write a check to a close friend or
family member for three thousand dollars and tell them that if you ever smoke a cigarette again,
they get to cash it.
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Ultimately, the most meaningful freedom in your life comes from your commitments, the
things in life for which you have chosen to sacrifice. There is emotional freedom in my
relationship with my wife that I would never be able to reproduce even if I dated a thousand
other women. There is freedom in my having played guitar for twenty years—a deeply artistic
expression—that I could not get if I just memorized dozens of songs. There is freedom in having
lived in one place for fifty years—an intimacy and familiarity with the community and culture—
that you cannot replicate no matter how much of the world you’ve seen.
Greater commitment allows for greater depth. A lack of commitment requires superficiality.
In the last ten years, there has been a trend toward “life hacking.” People want to learn a
language in a month, to visit fifteen countries in a month, to become a champion martial artist in
a week, and they come up with all sorts of “hacks” to do it. You see it all the time on YouTube
and social media these days: people undertaking ridiculous challenges just to show it can be
done. This “hacking” of life, though, simply amounts to trying to reap the rewards of
commitment without actually making a commitment. It’s another sad form of fake freedom. It’s
empty calories for the soul.
I recently read about a guy who memorized moves from a chess program to prove he could
“master” chess in a month. He didn’t learn anything about chess, didn’t engage with the strategy,
develop a style, learn tactics. Nope, he approached it like a gigantic homework assignment:
memorize the moves, win once against some highly ranked player, then declare mastery for
yourself.
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This is not winning anything. This is merely the appearance of winning something. It is the
appearance of commitment and sacrifice without the commitment and sacrifice. It is the
appearance of meaning where there is none.
Fake freedom puts us on the treadmill toward chasing more, whereas real freedom is the
conscious decision to live with less.
Fake freedom is addictive: no matter how much you have, you always feel as though it’s not
enough. Real freedom is repetitive, predictable, and sometimes dull.
Fake freedom has diminishing returns: it requires greater and greater amounts of energy to
achieve the same joy and meaning. Real freedom has increasing returns: it requires less and less
energy to achieve the same joy and meaning.
Fake freedom is seeing the world as an endless series of transactions and bargains which you
feel you’re winning. Real freedom is seeing the world unconditionally, with the only victory
being over your own desires.
Fake freedom requires the world to conform to your will. Real freedom requires nothing of
the world. It is only your will.
Ultimately, the overabundance of diversion and the fake freedom it produces limits our
ability to experience real freedom. The more options we have, the more variety before us, the
more difficult it becomes to choose, sacrifice, and focus. And we are seeing this conundrum play
out across our culture today.
In 2000, the Harvard political scientist Robert Putnam published his seminal book Bowling
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