The Serious Guide to Joke Writing: How To Say Something Funny About Anything pdfdrive com

Chapter Eleven (PRACTICAL): The
Surrealist Inquisition (Coming at a
Subject From Weird & Wonderful
Angles)
To raise new questions, new possibilities, to regard old problems from a
new angle, requires creative imagination and marks real advance in
science.
Albert Einstein
…and joke writing.
Me
It’s nearly the end of the course and time to string the students up and ask them
some  strange  questions:  It’s  the  Surrealist  Inquisition!  Weirdies,  beardies  and
profound thinkers love this method of writing jokes. It’s for finding new angles
on old, well-worn subjects. It’s for shaking up the way you think and coming at
things from somewhere else completely. When I tell my students this, they look
pleased, especially the surrealists - I do have some, they live in the fish tank at
the back of the room and blow bubbles at me!
‘But,’  I  say,  ‘The  Surrealist  Inquisition  takes  more  thought  than  the  other
methods and I’m not being sarcastic when I say for some people that’s hard. I’m
going to put a series of questions to you. And your initial response might be to
draw a blank: ‘Nothing fits. Nothing works. What’s the point, Sally?’ So I need
you to humour me. Go through the motions, try to answer the questions and see
what happens.’
The students look a bit scared now.
‘This is an exercise in fitting square pegs into round holes and the resulting push
is where the creativity happens.’
I get out my Surrealist Inquisition Question Sheet and we choose the subject of
democracy, which is broad, well-worn and, to be honest, a bit humdrum. Lovely.

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I read them the first question...
‘Describe democracy to aliens.’
‘The mass of the people voting for their leaders,’ ventures my first brave student.
‘Breakdown  the  words  “voting”  and  “people”,’  I  say.  ‘Aliens  won’t  understand
that.’
‘The beings on our planet register their opinion about who should lead them.’
‘Good,’  I  say.  ‘Now  imagine  you’re  aliens  watching  the  beings  on  our  planet
register their opinion about who should lead them. What might they think?’
‘That  it’s  cumbersome,’  says  the  bloke  next  to  me.  ‘Some  alien  species  don’t
need elections. They can just read everyone’s mind and know what to do.’
‘Okay, apply that back to us and our democracy,’ I say.
‘If it was like here we’d have Uri Geller as President of the world,’ he replies.
‘Or Derren Brown, says another student,’ screwing up her face.
This is a great idea, and for the next five minutes the class chat excitedly about
what  it  would  be  like  having  a  mind-reader  or  illusionist  running  the  country.
They discuss how it would affect Prime Minister’s Question Time and whether
they  would  end  it  by  saying,  ‘Was  that  your  card?’  Election  broadcasts  might
start: ‘Look into my eyes, look into my eyes.’
I tell them this is ideal for a double joke-web on illusionists and political leaders.
I’m pleased we’ve got a good solid idea, and we’re only on the first question! I
read them the next one...
‘How is democracy different in other countries?’
We kick around the idea of communist states, and don’t get anywhere. I tell the
class  it’s  okay,  because  we  have  explored  it  and  now  we  can  move  on.  I  know
people are always uncomfortable when things seem not to work, but when you
are searching for comedic ideas, not everything does.
It’s  like  looking  for  the  teabags  in  a  strange  kitchen.  You  have  to  open  all  the
drawers and cupboards before you track them down.
‘What do other countries do? Think about extreme opposites to us?’
‘In theocracies, the leader is chosen by God,’ says one student.
‘Apply the leader being chosen by God to democracy,’ I say.
He thinks for a while.
‘Well, I suppose God’s the only member of the electorate,’ he says, smiling, ‘Do
you think they set up a polling station for him and canvas His vote?’
‘Surely God would literally be a floating voter,’ someone else says.
We  all  laugh  at  that,  and  the  panic  that  we  didn’t  find  anything  on  communist
states is over, as the ideas flow fast from the students.
‘They’re  assuming  there’s  only  one  God.  What  about  the  Greek  and  Roman
gods.  Go  to  a  theocracy  and  say,  “if  your  election  criteria  is  God,  we’ve  got

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some other Gods here who’d like a vote.”’
‘The Christian God knows where to put the cross, there must be a pun there?’
‘Buddha  would  more  likely  be  the  floating  voter,’  says  someone  else  who’s
clearly been thinking about it. ‘He’d be rising above it all.’
The class are now on a roll. I let them finish and read them the next question...
‘Describe the situation to a child in terms they can understand. Put yourself