The Lucifer Effect
The prisoner answers, "I guess so, Mr. Correctional Officer."
"No way. They are not push-ups."
Jerry-5486 agrees, "If you say so, they are not push-ups, Mr. Correctional Of-
ficer."
Burdan jumps in: "He's swishing his ass, isn't he, 2093?"
Sarge meekly acquiesces: "If you say so, Mr. Correctional Officer."
Burdan: "What's he doing?"
5486 complies: "He's swishin' his ass."
Hellmann makes Paul-5704 demonstrate the way to do good push-ups for
416's edification.
"See that, 416? He's not pushin' his ass. He's not fuckin' a hole in the
ground. Now do it right!"
416 tries to imitate 5704, but he is unable to do so because he just does not
have enough strength. Burdan adds his mean observation: "Can't you keep your
body straight while you're doing this, 416? You look like you're on a roller coaster
or something."
Hellmann rarely uses physical aggression. He prefers instead to dominate
verbally, sarcastically, and with inventively sadistic games. He is always aware of
the exact freedom allowed him by the margin of his role as guard—he may impro-
vise but must not lose control of himself. However, this night's challenges have
gotten to him. He stands beside 416, who is lying on the ground in a push-up po-
sition, and orders him to do slow push-ups. Hellmann then puts his foot on top of
416's back as he goes up and pushes down hard on the backstroke. The others all
seem to be surprised at this physical abuse. After a couple of push-ups, the tough-
guy guard lifts his foot off of the prisoner's back and orders him back into the
Hole, slamming the door with a loud clang and locking it.
As I watch this, I recall prisoners' drawings of Nazi guards at Auschwitz
doing the same thing, stepping on a prisoner's back as he does push-ups.
"A Self-Righteous, Pious Asshole"
Burdan yells to 416 through the door of his confinement, "You don't eat, you're
not gonna have very much energy, 416." (I suspect Burdan is beginning to feel
sorry for the plight of this puny little kid.)
Now it is time for Guard Hellmann's ascendancy. He delivers a minisermon:
"I hope you boys are taking an example here. There is no reason for you to disobey
orders. I haven't given you anything you can't obey. There's no reason why I
should offend anybody. You're not in here for being upstanding citizens, you
know. All this self-righteous drivel makes me puke. And you can knock it off right
now."
He asks Sarge for an evaluation of his little speech, and Sarge answers, "I
think you made a nice speech, Mr. Correctional Officer."
Getting close to his face, Hellmann goes back to attacking Sarge: "You think
you're a self-righteous, pious asshole?"
Wednesday Is Spiraling Out of Control 127
Sarge replies: "If you wish to think so."
"Well, think about that. You are a self-righteous, pious asshole."
We are back on the not so merry-go-round, with Sarge replying "I will be one
if you wish me to be, Mr. Correctional Officer."
"I don't wish you to be, you just are."
"As you say, Mr. Correctional Officer."
Hellmann again goes up and down the ranks desperate for approval, and
each prisoner agrees with him.
"He's a self-righteous, pious asshole."
"A self-righteous, pious asshole, Mr. Correctional Officer."
"Yes, a self-righteous, pious asshole."
Delighted that at least this little world sees things his way, Hellmann tells
Sarge, "I'm sorry, it's four to one. You lose."
Sarge responds that all that matters is what he thinks of himself.
"Well, if you think something else, then I think you're in very serious trouble.
Because you're not really in touch with what is real, with reality. You live a life
that's nothing but mendacity, that's what you doin'. I'm sick of you, 2093."
"I'm sorry, Mr. Correctional Officer."
"You such a self-righteous, pious bastard that I wanna puke."
"I'm sorry if I make you feel that way, Mr. Correctional Officer." Burdan
makes Sarge bend over in a fixed position touching his toes, so that he doesn't
have to look at his face again.
"Say, 'Thank You, 416!' "
The last thing that Hellmann must achieve in his battle against belligerents is to
crush any sympathy that may be developing among the prisoners for the sad case
of 416.
"It is unfortunate that we all have to suffer because some people just don't
have their minds right. You've got a nice friend in here [as he bangs against the
door of the Hole]. He's gonna see to it that you don't get blankets tonight."
Hellmann aligns his plight with that of the prisoners, against their common
enemy, numero 416, who is about to harm them all by his foolish hunger strike.
Burdan and Hellmann line up the four prisoners and encourage them to say
"Thanks" to their fellow Prisoner 416 sitting in the dark, cramped Hole. Each
does so in turn.
"Why don't you all thank 416 for this?"
They all recite, "Thank you, 416."
Still even that is not sufficient for this devilish duo. Hellmann commands
them, "Now go over there, next to the door. I want you to thank him with your
fists, on the door."
They do so, one by one, banging on the door, as they recite, "Thank you,
416!" As they do, a loud, resonating noise booms through the Hole, to further ter-
rify pitiable 416, alone in there.
128 The Lucifer Effect
Burdan: "That's the way, with real spirit."
(It's difficult to determine the extent to which the other prisoners are angry
with 416 for causing them all this unnecessary grief, or are just following orders,
or are indirectly working off some of their frustrations and rage against the
guards' abuses.)
Hellmann shows them how to bang really hard against the door, several
times for good measure. Sarge is last and surprisingly complies meekly and obedi-
ently. When he is finished, Burdan grabs Sarge by the shoulders and pushes him
hard against the back wall. He then orders the prisoners back into their cells and
says to his chief operating officer, Hellmann, "They're all ready for lights-out, Of-
ficer."
THE DIRTY BLANKET BARGAIN
Recall the classic southern prison movie Cool Hand Luke, from which I borrowed
the idea that the guards and staff should wear silver reflecting sunglasses to cre-
ate a sense of anonymity. Tonight Guard Hellmann would improvise a script that
might rival the best that the scriptwriter could have created in shaping the nature
of prison authority. He enacts a creatively evil scene that demonstrates that his
power can create an arbitrary reality by providing the inmates with an illusion of
choice to punish one of their fellows.
Lights dimmed, prisoners in their cells, 416 in solitary. An eerie quiet looms
over the Yard. Hellmann slithers up on the table that is between the Hole and our
observation post, behind which we are recording these events, allowing us to get
a close look at the unfolding drama. As the chief night shift guard leans back
against the wall, legs crossed in a Buddha-like lotus position, one arm hanging be-
tween his legs, the other resting on the table, Hellmann is the portrait of power in
repose. He moves his head slowly from side to side. We notice his long sideburns,
muttonchops, down to his chin. He licks his thick lips as he chooses his words
carefully and articulates them with an accentuated southern drawl.
The Man has come up with a new Machiavellian plan. He lays out his terms
for the release of 416 from solitary. It is not up to him to decide to keep the trou-
blemaker in the Hole all night; rather, he is inviting all of them, the fellow prison-
ers, to make that decision: Should 416 be released now, or should he rot in the
Hole all night?
Just then, Kindly Guard Geoff Landry saunters into the Yard. At six feet three
and 185 pounds, he is the biggest of all the guards or prisoners. As usual, he
holds a cigarette in one hand, the other hand in his pocket, sunglasses conspicu-
ously absent. He walks to the center of the action, stops, looks distressed, frowns,
seems about to intervene, and does nothing but passively observe John Wayne
continue with showtime.
"Now, there are several ways to do this, depending on what you want to do.
Now, if 416 does not want to eat his sausages, then you can give me your blankets
Wednesday Is Spiraling Out of Control 129
and sleep on the bare mattress. Or you can keep your blankets and 416 will stay
in there another day. Now what will it be?"
"I'll keep my blanket, Mr. Correctional Officer," 7258 calls out immediately.
(Hubbie has no use for 416.)
"What will it be over here?"
"Keep my blanket," says Paul-5704, our former rebel leader.
"How about 5486?"
Refusing to yield to the social pressure, 5486 shows sympathy for the sad
416 by offering to give up his blanket so that 416 does not have to stay in solitary
for another day.
Burdan yells at him, "We don't want your blanket!"
"Now, you boys are gonna have to come to some kind of decision here."
Burdan, who has been assuming the posture of a swaggering little authority
figure with hands on hips, swinging his club as often as possible, walks up and
down past each of the cells. He turns to Sarge in his cell and asks him, "What do
you feel about it?"
Surprisingly, Sarge comes down from his high moral ground, which now
seems limited only to not speaking obscenities, declares, "If the other two wish to
keep their blankets, I'll keep my blanket." That proves to be the crucial swing vote.
Burdan exclaims, "We got three against one."
Hellmann repeats that message loud and clear, so that all can hear.
"We got three against one." As he slides off the table, the boss shouts into the
Hole, "416, you're gonna be in there for a while, so just get used to it!"
1 1
Hellmann struts off the Yard, with Burdan dutifully following and Landry
taking up the reluctant rear. An apparent victory has been won in the endless
struggle of guard power against organized prisoner resistance. Indeed, it has been
a hard day's night for these guards, but they can now enjoy the sweet taste of vic-
tory in this battle of wills and wits.
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