Workers World
, the newspaper of the Workers
World Party. Even without the mainstream press, though, awareness about us
grew as former Panthers across the country got involved, as well as prisoners’
rights groups. Anne Pruden, of Brooklyn, became a loyal and dedicated
friend, attempting to help us find a lawyer in those early days, even before
knowing the details that proved our innocence. Marina wrote to Amnesty
International on our behalf in May 2000, and we were placed on Amnesty’s
“watch list” of “individuals at risk.”
As our supporters grew in number, and under the pressure of the lawsuit,
the Department of Corrections and prison administration started harassing
me, King, and Herman. Censorship increased; they wouldn’t let us see a lot
of our mail. They started taking more interest in our books and magazines.
They said any article or book that mentioned the Black Panther Party was
contraband because it was “gang related.” A lot of our incoming mail was
“returned to sender” for various made-up reasons. Shakedowns became more
aggressive. Herman, King, and I all had the same reaction to the increased
pressure: Bring it on. Our personal safety was never an issue in our lives. We
were willing to risk anything and everything to uphold our political beliefs.
We felt the same way about backing the actions of our support committee.
People asked us if they should try to protect us. “No,” we said. “Don’t worry
what will happen to us,” I told them. “That is a nonissue.”
For the first time in decades there were people outside prison besides our
families who cared about us. People were fighting for us. They didn’t believe
the district attorney’s office. They didn’t believe the courts. They didn’t
believe the prison officials. They believed us and they believed in us. They
trusted us and offered us their friendship. We gave these people our
friendship. At first, it was hard for me to answer their letters. I wasn’t used to
letting people into my thoughts and life. But one characteristic Herman,
King, and I all shared was the willingness—and even need—to change. True
change can be very painful because you have to let go of part of yourself. We
knew from experience that by changing, we gained more than we lost. We
got more awareness. We got more compassion. We used to call it “raising our
consciousness.” We talked about how the entire human race needed to raise
its consciousness, not as individual races or groups, but as humans, as a
species. If we didn’t, human beings would become nonexistent, because we’d
destroy one another. Change meant growth.
Now I was being asked to change again, to let my guard down. It always
surprised me when I was asked for advice. “Instead of showing you how to
build courage,”
I wrote in response to someone asking me how to be brave,
“I
write to you to pay tribute to and salute your courage. I embrace your
courage. I lie down every night loving your courage. When I am in need of
purpose or focus I thank your courage. Courage is not an ongoing thing that
you walk around feeling every day. Like anything in life, it comes and goes
with the challenges we meet every day of our lives!”
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