Ielts sample essays collection


Uses a wide range of structures. The majority of sentences are error-free. Makes  only very occasional errors or inappropriacies



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Uses a wide range of structures. The majority of sentences are error-free. Makes 
only very occasional errors or inappropriacies.
 
Example 4
The line graph illustrates in terms or percentage the citizens aged 65 and above in 
USA, Sweden and Japan from 1940 to 2040. 
In 1940, USA had the highest amount of elderly people at around 9% while Japan 
was the lowest with 5%. Sweden was approximately at 6%. In the next 40 years 
both USA and Sweden gradually increased to reach 15% and 14% respectively. 
However, Japan slightly declined in the first 20 years from 5% to nearly 3% and then 
remained steady until 1980. Moreover, USA minimally decreased until 2019 and it is 
expected to sharply increase in the future to just under 25%. With regard to Sweden, 
it showed fluctuations and it is projected to exceed USA in 2040 at 25%. Finally, 
Japan modestly increased after the 1980’s until 2030 where a sharp increase in the 
number of elderly citizens is expected to exceed both USA and Sweden in 2040 at 
just over 25%. 
Overall, it is significant to note that the population of elderly of ages 65 and above 
are estimated to increase in all three countries with Japan being the highest and USA 
the lowest. 
(189 words) 
Score: 8.0 
Detail comments 
(TA) Task Achievement
A clear overview is given. The data are reported and compared well with the use of 
exact figures. 
(CC) Coherence and Cohesion
The answer is well-organised and easy to follow. The overview is in a separate 
Comment [A1]: 
of - typo? 
Comment [A2]: 
Should be “increase 
sharply
” 


- 13 - 
IELTS SAMPLE ESSAYS COLLECTION 
VOLUME 1 – Academic Training 

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