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26: Artful Forgiveness
A
rt provides a powerful tool for forgiveness
and emotional release. One of the most dra-
matic healings through art I have ever been privi-
leged to witness and/or to participate in, occurred at
the retreat I did in England. One of the participants
was a young woman with multiple sclerosis. Her body
was weak and wasted, and her voice was hardly au-
dible. Her throat chakra was virtually shut down. She
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had a husband and two children, but the marriage was
basically non-existent, and she felt trapped, helpless,
and hopeless.
At one point during a group art therapy session, she
began to draw in a particularly unique fashion. She
could not talk, but she kept drawing and drawing. It
was hard to discern what she was drawing, but it be-
came clear over time that she was using the medium
as a way to regress herself and release old childhood
pain.
My wife and I sat there with her as she drew hour after
hour, her drawings becoming more and more child-like
as time went on. In addition to her pictures, occasion-
ally she would scrawl phrases like “bad girl
”
and “God
doesn’t love me
”
and other words indicating deep
shame, guilt and fear. Finally, she made a crude stick
drawing of what she later was able to recall as child-
hood rape by an uncle. In this cathartic release, she
was able to express in drawings what she had found it
impossible to say in words and sounds. Her throat
chakra had shut down because of what she was forced
to do with her mouth. (Her uncle had made her have
oral sex with him.) Suddenly, art became an outlet for
memories and emotions that had remained repressed
for many years. These memories and emotions were
responsible for her illness.
To support this woman in her catharsis, my wife went to
the far end of the rather large room in which we were
holding the retreat. We then asked her to use her voice
to tell my wife that she was a good girl, and that God
loved her. I made her do it louder and louder until she
was shouting at the top of her lungs. After she had
shouted,
“God loves me,”
about 20 times, she stopped
and looked at me and affirmed, “He really does love
me, doesn’t he?!” That healing moment I will never for-
get.
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Three months after we got back from England, we re-
ceived a letter from her saying she had left her hus-
band, had gotten a new place to live and had found a
job. She was using her voice and asking for what she
wanted, and she was finding that she had the power
not only to ask but also to receive. She had even started
a support group for people with multiple sclerosis and
was doing art therapy with them. Her strength was re-
turning day by day, and after three years, we still hear
from her and marvel at her continuously increasing
strength.
If you are not a verbally inclined person and are not
comfortable writing things down, try drawing. You may
be surprised what will happen when you communicate
in this manner. Buy some decently sized white and
black paper as well as some colored pastel chalks and
crayons. (The pastels work really well on the black pa-
per.)
Know that to use this tool requires no artistic talent what-
soever. It is not about painting pretty pictures. In fact, if
you are full of anger, your pictures will probably be any-
thing but pretty. It is about getting emotions and
thoughts out on paper.
Begin drawing with no expectations or preconceived
ideas. You might ask God or your spirit guides to help
you release through the process of drawing and color-
ing whatever needs releasing and then simply start.
Whatever wants to come, allow it. Do not judge. Just
go with the flow. Do this like a meditation. If you want
to tell a story, do that. If you just want to use color, do
that. Do whatever you feel like doing.
To use art therapy as a forgiveness tool, use an ap-
proach similar to that of the letter trilogy. Do a series
of drawings that express how you felt about what a par-
ticular person did to you; these pictures would express
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your anger, fear, pain, sadness, etc. Then, move into a
more compassionate and understanding frame of mind,
and do some drawings that reflect this attitude. Do a
third set that expresses the feeling of Radical Forgive-
ness. You might want to put some time between each
phase, or you can do them all in the same sitting. Make
sure, however, that once you start doing this art therapy,
you complete all three stages — even if you only do
three drawings in all. Doing just the first one, for ex-
ample, might leave you stuck in anger.
As you finish each picture, hang it on a wall. Place
each picture in the precise order in which you complete
them, and create a vertical or horizontal band on the
wall with them. If you are creating a vertical display,
begin with the first of the angry ones at the bottom and
end with the last Radical Forgiveness one at the top.
When you place them in such a manner, you will be
amazed to see the progression and the change in the
quality of the energy expressed by each picture.
Title each drawing and date it. Spend some time with
the drawings. Let them “speak” to you. While you were
drawing each picture, you were thinking certain
thoughts. When you look at the drawing later, clear your
mind of those thoughts and examine the pictures for
anything else of importance. Invite others you trust to
give you their interpretations of the pictures. They may
see things you do not. Ask for their input by saying, “If
this were your picture, what would you see?” If what
they see resonates with you, fine. If it does not really
ring true for you, that is fine too. They see into your draw-
ing through their own subconscious, not yours, but you
will find that people’s observations will trigger within
you a whole new way of looking at your drawings, and
you may have some new insights as a result.
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