All praise is due only to Allaah. We laud Him and beseech His

 
The three stages of rectifying a woman
The Qur`aan Majeed has prescribed to us the manner in which 
to conduct our affairs. If there is any matter which the husband 
finds distasteful in his wife, then he should reflect on her good 
side and overlook her faults. However, if the husband still feels 
that there are some such qualities and bad traits in his wife 

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which cannot be tolerated and need rectification, and this is his 
duty, then too, the Qur`aan Majeed prescribes the manner in 
which to go about it. Allaah Ta`ala states in the Qur`aan 
Majeed, 
“And those women from which you fear evil, you 
should counsel them, and then (if this does not work) separate 
yourselves from their beds and (if this also bears no result) 
then you should strike them (very lightly, i.e. NOT beat them).”
[Surah Nisaa, Aayat 34] 
Firstly the husband should counsel the wife with kindness and 
compassion. This is the first stage. If she corrects her ways 
after the advices, then enough, the husband should not proceed 
any further. If this stage fails, then the husband should separate 
from her bed and sleep in another room. If she reforms and 
rectifies her errors, then the husband should leave the matter 
right there and not proceed any further. 
The extent to which a husband can strike his wife
If this second stage of rectification did not work, then the 
husband can proceed to the third stage. He should strike her. 
But how is he to strike her? And to what extent? 
Regarding this, on the occasion of Hajjatul Widaa, amongst all 
the other advices, Nabi (sallallahu alayhi wasallam) also gave 
this advice, 
“And when you (need to) hit them, then strike them 
such that it is not violent, intense or painful.”
The first stages 
are first to be explored and this is the final and last stage when 
there is no other way left. The Shariah has also stipulated the 
condition that when the husband strikes his wife it should not 
be painful for her. The actual object of striking her is to make 
her aware of her folly and the purpose is not to maim her or 
even cause the slightest pain.