Why Men Love Bitches

Regardless of how pretty a woman is, looks
alone will not sustain his respect. Appearance
may pull him in, but it is your independence
that will keep him turned on.
Dignity and pride aren’t about whether you pull money out of a
drawer, a sack, or a wallet. It isn’t about being given a credit card
or pulling cash out of a Versateller. If you have an income, however
small, it enables you to:
1. Live by your own rules
2. Move to your rhythm, instead of dancing to the beat of
someone else’s drum
3. Decide how you want to be treated
4. Choose what you will or will not tolerate
5. Leave if you don’t get what you want
Everything in this list is precisely what the bitch values most. She
keeps her power in 
every
way. And as Henry Kissinger said,
“Power is the great aphrodisiac.”

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Dollars and No Sense
While conducting research for this book, I was surprised to find
that, generally speaking, men don’t mind picking up the tab on a
date. What they do mind is the overriding sense that women act as
if they are entitled to it—or as if they 
expect
it.
When you act as if you expect something, you make a man feel
unappreciated. If he pays, it’s always best to help him realize that
you took time to notice that he went out of his way, and that you
are grateful.
Over and over, men have expressed to me their frustration with
women who lack gratitude and those who automatically expect a
man to pay. There are some women who, even when it’s a man’s
birthday, will take him out and expect him to pay. There were many
men who, when interviewed for this book, shared stories about
birthdays or holidays in which their partners still expected them to
pick up the tab.
In one instance, a woman invited other people to a birthday party
and expected the “birthday boy” to pay for everybody. The bill
came and people reached for their wallets at the dinner table. “Oh,
no, you guys. Marc will get that,” the woman said. (Needless to
say, Marc was not too happy.) It was the automatic expectation
that made him feel unappreciated.
The same goes for flowers or a gift. Do you act excited and
appreciative, or do you barely mumble a thank-you and then put the
flowers in water? If he brings you a wilted, week-old bunch of

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flowers from the supermarket that cost $2.99, hold back. Just
muster up a thank you, smile, and put them in water.
If he gives you a gift, don’t fess up that you always go back and
exchange it, or he’ll stop bringing you little tokens of his affection. If
you can, exchange it for something similar, then tell him it’s the same
one he bought you. Say, “It looks different on, huh?” (He’ll never
know the difference.)
If you want him to give you jewelry, don’t ever utter the words
“pawn shop.” If you pawned jewelry given to you by an ex-
boyfriend or husband, never disclose that information to a man
you’re seeing.
Acknowledgment is very important to men. A man I know, John,
once ended a relationship with Kate, a woman he was dating,
because he felt she was not grateful for a gift that he gave her. One
day, when he was at her place, she asked him to move an old
television from one room to the next. It had sentimental value to her
because her father had given it to her. Without intending to, he
dropped the TV and it broke. He described what happened: “I felt
really bad, so I went out and bought her a twenty-six-hundred-
dollar entertainment center with an amazing TV and stereo. A week
later some friends came over and said, ‘Wow! What a nice TV.
Then she said in a sarcastic tone, ‘John broke the other one.’ I just
about fell off my chair.”
John left her apartment that evening and never saw her again.
Because men aren’t conditioned to express their emotions,
women sometimes assume that when men spend their money, it

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doesn’t mean anything to them or they didn’t have to do anything to
earn it. If a man gives you something, show him the respect he
deserves by thanking him for the kindness. If you want to be treated
well, you have to 
encourage
it by making him feel important and
special whenever he does something generous and gracious.
Otherwise, he won’t have an incentive to do it again.
Vinnie, who is very generous by nature, talked about a woman
named Shawna who ordered lobster when they went to an
expensive restaurant. He said, “I don’t mind that she ordered the
lobster, but after that she just picked at it. Then she said, ‘I wasn’t
really hungry, anyway’. That bothered me.”
Again, the issue is whether you 
act as though you expect or are
owed what he gives you,
or whether you appreciate his generosity
and kindness. Many men enjoy feeling like the provider, as long as
they feel 
appreciated for what they give.
If he opens doors for you, let him know that you admire that,
too. Whenever he feels that you admire his masculinity, and his
brawn, it makes him feel rewarded. This is a way you can build him
up.
Money can also be a telling barometer of where a man is coming
from, or what a man’s intentions are. One woman I know named
Carla dated a man named Guy, who made it very clear that he
couldn’t afford to pay for dates. Guy always had an elaborate
explanation as to why he couldn’t pay. Each time they went out, it
was a Dutch treat. Nevertheless, he insisted on terms that would be
“even Steven.” Fair and square. Without exception.

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One time Carla accompanied Guy to a bar with several of his
friends. To her surprise, he had no problem buying his buddies one
drink after another. He paid for two rounds in twenty minutes,
dropping $80 on drinks without thinking twice. “Waitress? My
buddy Steve wants another Long Island iced tea.” It was only that
morning he had asked his date to pay $7 for her scrambled eggs
and bacon at breakfast.
Needless to say, this showed Carla that Guy didn’t have
sufficient value for the relationship so she stopped seeing him.
Usually when a man insists on splitting a check on the first few
dates, he’s showing you right up front he doesn’t value you or the
relationship.
Granted, some women refuse to have a man open doors or pick
up a tab. They refuse to be “paid for.” A bitch has no problem and
no “issues” surrounding being treated well, so she lets a man give—
and she allows herself to receive. The nice girl who won’t allow
herself to be treated to a dinner, deep down usually doesn’t want to
feel obligated to a man and she knows she will be if he pays for
dinner. The bitch has no such complex. She says thank-you politely
and graciously. And at no time does she feel guilty or obligated.
Nor does she feel compromised in any way.
If he’s a student or is truly struggling financially but he still wants
to impress you, he’ll suggest doing something that costs less. Or
he’ll suggest doing something that doesn’t cost anything at all. He
can grab some inexpensive wine and a blanket and take you to a
beautiful park. Or, he can get movie screening tickets. Or, he can

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invite you to a party. If he’s absolutely crazy about you, he won’t let
you pay for the tab or go Dutch.
I know of a female doctor named Susie who was living with a
man named George, who was also a doctor. She had just
graduated and was doing her residency, so her income was less
than that of a part-time nurse. George, on the other hand, was a
well-established surgeon and was earning a substantial income.
They lived together in his Hollywood Hills home, which was
almost paid off; still he insisted that Susie pay a sizable sum of
money for so-called “rent.” They also split everything right down the
middle: groceries, the electric bill, and so on, with the exception of
cat litter and cat food, which Susie was required to buy (since it
was her cat).
ATTRACTION PRINCIPLE #84