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16. Abracadabra
– Harry, Harry, Harry, Harry, you have the right haircut, the right scar, the right looks.
You even have a wand. But, you do not have…
– Sir?
– You still do not know how to say…
– What? Sir?
– You cannot pronounce the word…
– Yes, I can, I can!
– Do not interrupt me, Harry! You’re cruising for a bruising!
Just shut your mouth and sit there! I’m two hundred years old,
I have a very bad temper, and I can smack you, if you do it again! You get my drift?
– Yes, sir! I do, sir!
– And take that finger out of your nose when I’m talking to you!
OK, now, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted,
you, Harry, cannot properly pronounce the word “abracadabra”.
You wanna try it once again, Harry?
– Yes, Professor Doubledoork!
– Do it then.
– Abracalabra… ablacramabra… abrashmabra… abra…
– Get out of my face, you, little twit! Out, out!
How do you intend to defeat the all-powerful Lord Ugliwart,
if you can’t say this simple word “ablaca… avrac…”
Oh, never mind! Go and study, Harry! Study! Shame on you! No dessert for you tonight!
Ablaca… Oh damn!
17. What’s The Difference?
– Good morning, Jim! Can you help me with the computer again?
– Uh, sure, but those guys never brought it back…
– Yes, they did. It’s sitting on my desk!
– No way! They couldn’t have gotten past me without my seeing them.
– But, I’m telling you – it’s right there. I’ve just seen it.
– Oh, maybe, you’ve seen a ghost or something…
– Are you gonna help or should I ask somebody else?
– Oh, I guess… let’s go…
– Here it is!
– Where?
– Right here – in front of you!
– I’m not blind. I told you they never brought it back from the shop. It’s not here.
– If you’re making some kind of joke, it’s not funny. What’s this in your opinion!?
– It’s only a monitor.
– A monitor, a computer… What’s the difference?
Just help me turn it on – I’ve got work to do!
– Oh, Good Lord!
18. When You Go To San Francisco
– So, how was San Fran? “When you go to San Francisco…”
Have you met any “nice people” there?
– It’s a pretty cool town, actually. I saw quite a few bums on the streets, though…
– Well, you can’t go anywhere without seeing bums these days.
They’re a permanent part of the picture, I guess. Where did you stay?
– In the Silver Cloud Inn. A pretty nice hotel, actually...
– Did you go to Alcatraz?
– Yes, I did. And to Chinatown and the Golden Gate Bridge. All the usual.
And, the next day, a buddy of mine drove me all the way down to Monterey.
– Did you take the One-O-One to Salinas and the Laguna Seca Road?
It’s beautiful country there.
– No, first, we went to Santa Cruz and then down to Monterey.
– Santa Cruz? That’s where all the old hippies moved from San Fran.
Well, actually some of them settled down in Oregon…
But anyhow, there are all those little quaint shops in downtown Santa Cruz, near the beach,
selling pipes, beads, rainbow shirts
,
a
ll
that kind of stuff…
– Peace, brother!
– Yeah, dude, make love, not war!
– Hey, hey! Ho, ho!
The hate must go!
19. Yeah, Dude…
– OK. The rainbow days are over. Now, the suits rule the world once again...
But, you seem to know an awful lot about that area. How come?
– Well, as a matter of fact, I lived in Monterey for a few years. In Pacific Grove, to be exact…
– Really? We drove right through it to get on the Seventeen Mile Drive.
What a great coastline there! We even saw deer on a golf course!
– I know. Those deer liked to eat my landlady’s roses every night. Couldn’t chase them away.
Finally we had to have a fence built. But, they would jump the fence and do it anyway.
The poor lady was absolutely desperate!
She wanted me to sleep outside and guard the roses!
But, you said you took that Seventeen Mile Drive.
You know that I hiked a trail along that Drive almost every day?
My house was practically next to the Drive’s Gate, and I walked from there
through Pebble Beach down to the ocean
and all the way up to the point where you could see Carmel.
– Really? It’s a pretty long hike! I’m amazed. You’re a monster hiker, man!
– Well, unfortunately, not any more. To be honest, I slowed down a bit…
– Yeah, dude, me too…
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