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How to Talk to Anyone 92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships (Leil Lowndes) (z-lib.org)

Don’t Leave It to Chance
Politicians make a science out of Tracking. They keep a little black
box either on their desk, in their computer, or in their brain of the
last concern, enthusiasm, or event discussed with everyone in their
life. They keep track of where the people were, what they said,
and what they were doing since the last conversation. Then the
first words of the next phone call or meeting with that person
relates to that information:
“Hello, Joe. How was your trip to Jamaica?”
“Hey Sam, did your kid make the baseball team?”
“Hi, Sally. Have you heard back from your client yet?”
“Nice to hear from you, Bob. It means you survived that
Szechuan restaurant you were going to last time we spoke.”
282
How to Talk to Anyone
08 (265-292) part eight 8/14/03 9:19 AM Page 282


When you invoke the last major or minor event in anyone’s
life, it confirms what they’ve known all along. They’re the most
important person in the world.
One of the most powerful forms of tracking is remembering
anniversaries of people’s personal achievements. Did your boss get
promoted to her present position one year ago today? Did your
client go public? How much more memorable than a birthday card
to send a one-year congratulations note.
Remembering people’s private passions is another. Several
years ago, I wrote regularly for a magazine. My then-editor, Car-
rie, was obsessed with her new kitten named Cookie. Recently I
ran into Carrie at a writer’s conference. In early conversation I said
to her, “I guess Cookie’s a full-grown cat by now. How is she?”
Carrie’s astonished smile was my reward.
“Leil,” she squealed, “I can’t believe you remember Cookie.
Yes, she’s fine now and . . .” Carrie went on for another ten min-
utes about Cookie, the now full-grown cat.
How to Make ’Em Feel Like a Movie Star
283

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