party giver. A savvy politician introduces the job-seeking daugh-
ter to some executives at the party or tells the most alluring women
at the bash what a great guy birthday boy is. When chatting with
reporters, he talks up the host’s business that needs good PR.
When people support the real
why
of the party, they become
popular and sought-after guests for future events.
Where Is the Collective Mind?
Often people from one profession or one interest group will com-
prise most of the guest list. A politician never accepts any invita-
tion without asking herself, “What kind of people will be at this
party, and what will they be thinking about?” Perhaps there will
be a drove of doctors. So she clicks on the latest medical headlines
and rehearses a little doc-talk. If the guests are a nest of new-age
voters, the politician gets up to speed on telepathic healing, Tantric
toning, and trance dancing. Politicians can’t afford to not be in the
know.
How Am I Going to Follow Up on
the Party?
Now, the big finale. I call it “Contact Cement.” It’s cementing the
contacts the politician has made. After meeting a good contact
and exchanging cards, practically everyone says, “It’s been great
talking to you. We’ll stay in touch.”
This good intention seldom happens without herculean effort.
Politicians, however, make a science out of keeping up the con-
tact. After the party, they sit at their desks and, like a game of soli-
taire, lay out the business cards of the people they’ve met. Using
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“The Business Card Dossier” technique described later in this sec-
tion, they decide how, when, and if to deal with each. Does this
person require a phone call? Should that one receive a handwrit-
ten note? Shall I E-mail or call the other one?
Use the Six-Point Party Checklist—the Who? When? Why?
Where? What? and How? of a party—as your general game plan.
Now let’s get down to specifics.
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The average party goer, let’s say Charlie, arrives at the bash. He
makes a beeline for the refreshment table for munchies and a bev-
erage. He then finds a few buddies and starts chatting away with
them.
Chewing the nibbles on his plate and the fat with his friends,
he occasionally looks around the room to see who might be new
and fun to talk to. He’s hoping several attractive and interesting
people at the party will spot him and come over to talk.
What’s wrong with Charlie’s approach? Everything, if Char-
lie wants to make the party productive. Let’s start with the aver-
age party goer’s first mistake—getting some refreshments and a
drink right off the bat.
People mingling at a party make judgments, often subcon-
scious, about whom they are going to approach. Have you ever
lived on a farm? Or had a dog or a cat? Then you know you never
disturb animals when they are eating. Likewise, when a human
animal is eating, other human animals do not feel comfortable
advancing. If party goers’ eyes scan the crowd and see you with
the feed bag on, they pass right over you. Subconsciously they’re
saying to themselves, “Let the hungry hound chow down and
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Copyright 2003 by Leil Lowndes. Click Here for Terms of Use.
maybe we’ll talk later.” Later never comes because they wind up
making friends with someone else whose mouth wasn’t full.
Politicians always eat before they come to the party. They
know they’d need a circus juggler’s talent to shake hands, exchange
business cards, hold a drink, and stuff crackers and cheese into
their mouths—all with just two hands.
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