Understanding Psychology (10th Ed)



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Understanding Psychology

 
Module 55 
Positive and Negative Social Behavior 
607
are similar between the two partners (Sternberg, Hojjat, & Barnes, 2001; Sternberg, 
2004a; Sternberg, 2006; see Figure 1). 
Is love a necessary ingredient in a good marriage? Yes, if you live in the United 
States. In contrast, it’s considerably less important in other cultures. Although mutual 
attraction and love are the two most important characteristics men and women in 
the United States desire in a mate, men in China rated good health as most important
and women there rated emotional stability and maturity as most important. Among 
the Zulu in South Africa, men rated emotional stability fi rst and women rated 
dependable character fi rst (Buss, Abbott, & Angleitner, 1990; see Figure 2). 
FIGURE 1 
According to Sternberg, love 
has three main components: intimacy, 
passion, and decision/commitment. 
Diff erent combinations of these compo-
nents can create other types of love. 
Nonlove contains none of the three 
components.
Romantic love 
(intimacy + passion) 
Infatuation 
(passion) 
Fatuous love 
(passion + decision/commitment) 
Empty love 
(decision/ 
commitment) 
Companionate love 
(intimacy + decision/commitment) 
Consummate 
love 
(intimacy + passion + 
decision/commitment) 
Liking
(intimacy)
 
Rank Ordering of Desired Characteristics in a Mate
 
United States 
China 
South Africa Zulu
 
Females 
Males Females 
Males Females 
Males
Mutual attraction—love 





10
Emotional stability and maturity 





1
Dependable character 





3
Pleasing disposition 


16 
13 

4
Education and intelligence 





6
Good health 





5
Good looks 
13 

15 
11 
16 
14
Sociability 8 


12 

11
Desire for home and children 





9
Refi nement, neatness 
12 
10 
10 

10 
7
Ambition and industriousness 

11 

10 

8
Similar education 
10 
12 
12 
15 
12 
12
Good cook and housekeeper 
16 
13 
11 

15 
2
Favorable social status or rating 
14 
14 
13 
14 
14 
17
Similar religious background 
15 
15 
18 
18 
11 
16
Good fi nancial prospect 
11 
16 
14 
16 
13 
18
Chastity (no prior sexual intercourse) 
18 
17 


18 
13
Similar political background 
17 
18 
17 
17 
17 
15
FIGURE 2 
Although love may be an important factor in choosing a marriage partner if you 
live in the United States, other cultures place less importance on it. 
(Source: Buss, Abbott, & 
Angleitner, 1990.)
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