Understanding Psychology (10th Ed)



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Understanding Psychology

M O D U L E 5 5 
Positive and Negative 
Social Behavior 
interpersonal attraction (or close 
relationship) 
Positive feelings for 
others; liking and loving.
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Module 55 
Positive and Negative Social Behavior 
605
Similarity. Folk wisdom tells us that birds of a feather fl ock 
together. However, it also maintains that opposites attract. Social 
psychologists have come up with a clear verdict regarding which 
of the two statements is correct: We tend to like those who are 
similar to us. Discovering that others have similar attitudes, 
values, or traits promotes our liking for them. Furthermore, the 
more similar others are, the more we like them. One reason 
similarity increases the likelihood of interpersonal attraction is 
that we assume people with similar attitudes will evaluate us 
positively. Because we experience a strong
reciprocity-of-liking 
effect
(a tendency to like those who like us), knowing that 
someone evaluates us positively promotes our attraction to that 
person. In addition, we assume that when we like someone else, 
that person likes us in return (Bates, 2002; Umphress, Smith-
Crowe, & Brief, 2007; Montoya & Insko, 2008).
Physical attractiveness . For most people, the equation beautiful
5
good is quite true. As a result, physically attractive people are 
more popular than physically unattractive ones, if all other 
factors are equal. This fi nding, which contradicts the values that 
most people say they hold, is apparent even in childhood—with 
children of nursery school age rating their peers’ popularity on 
the basis of attractiveness—and continues into adulthood. 
Indeed, physical attractiveness may be the single most important 
element promoting initial liking in college dating situations, 
although its infl uence eventually decreases when people get to know each 
other better (Zebrowitz & Montepare, 2005; Little, Burt, & Perrett, 2006; Luo & 
Zhang, 2009).
These factors alone, of course, do not account for liking. For example, in one 
experiment that examined the desired qualities in a friendship, the top-rated qualities 
in a same-sex friend included sense of humor, warmth and kindness, expressiveness 
and openness, an exciting personality, and similarity of interests and leisure activities 
(Sprecher & Regan, 2002). (For more on friendship, see Applying Psychology in the 21st 
Century for a discussion of online social networking.)

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