Copyright 2001, Colin C. Tipping

part of who we are. It’s like saving what you have done on
the computer to the hard drive. Only then will it become
permanent.
I find that ‘Satori’ breathwork is a very good way to inte-
grate the change whether it is done as part of the work-
shop or soon thereafter. This entails lying down and
breathing consciously in a circular fashion to loud music.
(See Chapter 27).
With the worksheet, the integration comes through the
writing and reading the statements out loud. With the 13
Steps, it is making the verbal affirmation to see the per-
fection. With the ceremony it is in the act of walking across
the circle and saying something of an affirmative nature
to someone else coming in the other direction. Ritual,
ceremony, and, of course, music is also used to integrate
the shift in perception that is Radical Forgiveness.
These five stages don’t necessarily occur in this order.
Very often we move through them, or some of them at
least, simultaneously, or we keep coming back and forth
from one stage to another in a kind of circular or spiralling
fashion.
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18: Fake It ’Til You Make It
F
orgiveness is a journey, and it always begins from
a place of nonforgiveness. Getting there can take
years or minutes, and we know now that this is a
matter of choice. Traditional forgiveness takes a long
time, but we can do it quickly through Radical Forgive-
ness simply by expressing our 
willingness
to see the
perfection. Each time we do this, it represents an act
of faith, a prayer, an offering, a humble request for Di-
vine assistance. We do this at moments when we feel
unable to forgive, and in that sense it is a fake-it-’til-
you-make it process.
Surrendering
Faking it until you make it really means surrendering to
the process, putting forth no effort nor trying to control
the results. In the Seattle study (Chapter 13), the more
effort the participants put into trying to forgive, the more
difficult they found it to let go of their hurt and anger.
When they stopped trying to forgive and to control the
process, at some point in time forgiveness just hap-
pened.
It is true that the energetic shift from anger and blame
to forgiveness
 
and responsibility happens much more
quickly with Radical Forgiveness because, using the
tools given here, we can drop the victim consciousness.
Consciousness, you will recall from Chapter 13,
changes time. Nevertheless, even with Radical For-
giveness, we must enter the process with no expecta-
tion of when an energy shift might happen — even
though we know that it can happen instantaneously.
Exactly when the results begin to show up may depend
on things we know little about. It might take a while
before we begin to really feel unconditional acceptance
for the person involved and peace around the situation
— which is how we know when the forgiveness pro-
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cess is complete. It might take many worksheets, for
example, to reach this point.
However, it will be of comfort to many to learn that we
do not have to like the person to forgive them. Neither
do we have to stay in their company if their personality
and/or their behavior is toxic to us. Radical Forgive-
ness is a soul- to-soul interaction and requires only that
we become connected at the soul level. When we feel
this unconditional love for their soul, our soul joins theirs,
and we become one.