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S C A T T E R B R A I N E D
QUEEN ELIZABETH I (1533–1603)
Old Liz loved her theater and poetry, so she was a big pa-
tron of both. In fact, she even penned a couple of sonnets.
But does that make her Shakespeare? A handful of scholars
argue that it might and point to similarities between fa-
mous portraits of the Bard and the queen as evidence, sug-
gesting that Shakespeare’s likeness was based upon the
“real” author of his work. Alas, the fact that she spent most
of her time defeating the Spanish Armada and colonizing
America seems to leave the lady’s hands free of any ink
spots.
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