Ielts model Essays Kindle

Model Answer
Some people think that parents should tell stories or read to their
children. However, others believe that these days this isn't necessary as
 children have so many other sources for stories, such as books, films
and TV.
Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Some people believe that in today’s modern times, with increased access to
various forms of entertainment, it is no longer necessary for parents to
spend time reading to children or telling them stories. While it may be true
that children today have access to more stimulation than ever before, I fear
this argument overlooks the many other benefits of story time to both the
children and parents.
The increased availability of a variety of stories through varied platforms
gives children of all ages greater access to new and exciting worlds. Where
parents would traditionally be able to share one or two stories in a day, a
child today can engage with a different story every hour or two. This helps
build creativity and grows a child’s sense of the world around them.
Because of the range of mediums, children learn to interpret and engage
with a story through other senses beyond just listening. The improved
graphics in TV and movies have opened up whole worlds of characters that
come to life in a new and exciting way not previously possible.

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However, an in-person story allows children to interact with it - asking
questions, adding their own creative input and immersing themselves in this
new world, with their parents along for the adventure. The interpersonal
nature of reading to a child allows them to use their own imagination to
create a visual world for the story, an important form of creative expression
for growing minds. The aspect of time spent together is also important to a
child’s development. In a world where children spend time alone with
screens for stimulation from a very young age, it’s important that they also
receive one-on-one time with parents to develop interpersonal skills and
meaningful relationships. 
There is no denying that access to a wide range of stimulation for children
can provide many of the benefits of traditional storytelling such as
stimulating concentration, imagination and curiosity., but in my opinion, it
is not a replacement for the tradition of telling stories. One-on-one time,
interaction and a different form of creative expression are only some of
these benefits that would be lost if we left all forms of entertainment up to
books, TV or movies.
(373 Words)
Comments
This essay for IELTS would achieve a high score because it answers the
question, discussing both the opinions, with the writer also giving their own
opinion.
It is a clearly organised essay, with each body paragraph based around one
central idea. There is also a good mix of vocabulary and grammar, used
correctly and accurately. 
It would also get a high score for Task Response as it gives a lot of relevant
information, with ideas expanded on and discussed fully.
This though makes it 373 words. You'd have to be a very confident and
high level writer to write that much accurately and coherently in 40

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minutes, so if you are a lower level writer you should aim to write less. You
can also reduce the length of the introduction and conclusions. 

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