HOW TO WRITE GREAT ESSAYS
CHAPTER 5
Revising, Editing, and Proofreading
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As you read the hard copy of your essay, pencil in hand, circle
any problems as you
encounter them. You might also want to make a quick note in the margin with an idea or
two about how to improve the problem(s). Ask yourself the following questions:
■
Do I repeat myself? Rework your point so that you say it well the first time
and remove any repetitious words and phrases.
■
Do I have enough details? Look through your essay for generalities and make
them more specific.
■
Do I reinforce each point with a concrete and/or personal example?
■
Is my sentence structure varied? Sentences
should not be the same length, nor
should they be repetitive in any other way, such as all beginning with “I.”
■
Are there any clichés or other types of overused language?
■
Do I use the active voice whenever possible?
■
Are there too many or too few adjectives and adverbs?
■
Are verb tenses consistent?
■
Is the antecedent for every pronoun clear?
After you have read through your essay a few times and highlighted any areas that need
improving, focus on one problem at a time. For instance, if you
find that you have used the
passive voice too often, review the section on active versus passive voice in Chapter 4 (page
45). Then, rework your problem areas as the writer did on the following sentences. Note
the freshness and originality of the second example as compared to the first:
A moving speech was made by our principal, and there was much grief and love
expressed in the tears of Al’s friends.
I listen to our
principal make a moving speech, and then see Al’s friends break
down as they try to express their love and grief for him.
If you find too much unoriginal language, review the section on clichés found in Chap-
ter 3. Replace any overused phrases and images with fresh words that are uniquely your own.
For example, the following sentence is stale and boring. It even seems self-conscious of this
fact as the phrase “behind the scenes” is in quotation marks:
My interest in an accounting career was inspired predominantly by my parents’
business. Throughout my childhood I was exposed to the “behind the scenes”
aspect of operating
a small family business, and took great interest in the finan-
cial component of the operations.
Here, the writer reworked the sentences, making them more personal and original. They
follow the advice of showing rather than simply telling, using
sensory images to bring the
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