disjointed
. It was like sitting through a movie where the
picture is almost—but not quite—focused. Sometimes he seemed like Arnie,
but at others he didn't seem like Arnie at all. He had picked up mannerisms I
had never noticed before—twirling his car-keys nervously on the rectangle
of leather to which they were attached, cracking his knuckles, occasionally
biting at the ball of his thumb with his upper front teeth. There was that
comment about putting it up the little tramp's ass when he tossed his beer-can.
And although he had gotten through five beers by the time I had finished my
second, just downing them one after the other, he still didn't seem drunk.
And there were mannerisms I had always associated with Arnie which
seemed to have disappeared completely: the quick, nervous pull at his
earlobe when he was talking, the sudden stretch of his long legs ending with
the ankles briefly crossed, his habit of expressing amusement by hissing air
through his pursed lips instead of laughing outright. He did do that last once
or twice. But more often he would signal his amusement in a string of shrill
chuckles that I associated with LeBay.
The special finished up at eleven, and Arnie switched around the dial until he
found a dance-party in some New York hotel where they kept switching
outside to Times Square, where a big crowd had already gathered. It wasn't
Guy Lombardo, but it was close.
"You're really not going to college?" I asked.
"Not this year. Christine and I are going to head out for California right after
graduation. That golden shore."
"Your folks know?"
He looked startled at the idea. "Hell, no! And don't you tell them, either! I
need that like I need a rubber dick!"
"What are you going to do out there?"
He shrugged. "Look for a job fixing cars. I'm as good at that as I am at
anything." And then he stunned me by saying casually, "I'm hoping I can
persuade Leigh to come with me.
I swallowed beer the wrong way and began to cough, spraying my pants.
Arnie slammed me on the back twice, hard. "You okay?"
"Sure," I managed. "Just went down the wrong pipe. Arnie… if you think
she's going to come with you, you're living in a dream world. She's working
on her college applications. She's got a whole file of them, man. She's really
serious about it."
His eyes narrowed immediately, and I had a sinking feeling that the beer had
betrayed me into saying more than I should have.
"How come you know so much about my girl?"
All of a sudden I felt as if I had been dropped into a long field that was full
of loaded mines. "It's all she talks about Arnie. Once she gets started on the
subject, you can't shut her up."
"Chummy. You're not moving in, are you, Dennis?" He was watching me
closely, his eyes slitted with suspicion. "You wouldn't do anything like that,
would you?"
"No," I said, lying completely and fully. "That's a hell of a thing to say."
"Then how do you know so much about what she's doing?"
"I see her around," I said, "We talk about you."
"She talks about me?"
"Yeah, a little," I said casually. "She said that you and she had a fight over
Christine."
It was the right thing. He relaxed. "It was just a little thing. Just a little spat.
She'll come around. And there are good schools out in California, if she
wants to go to school. We're going to be married, Dennis. Have kids and all
that shit."
I struggled to keep my poker face. "Does she know that?"
He laughed. "No way! Not yet. But she will. Soon enough. I love her, and
nothing's going to get in the way of that." The laughter died away. "What did
she say about Christine?"
Another mine.
"She said she didn't like her. I think… that maybe she was a little jealous."
It was the right thing again. He relaxed even more. "Yeah, she sure was. But
she'll come around, Dennis. The course of true love never runs smooth, but
she'll come around, don't worry. If you see her again, tell her I'm going to
call. Or talk to her when school starts again."
I considered telling him that Leigh was in California right now and decided
not to. And I wondered what this new suspicious Arnie would do if he knew
I had kissed the girl he thought he was going to marry, had held her was
failing in love with her.
"Look, Dennis!" Arnie cried, and pointed at the TV.
They had switched to Times Square again. The crowd was a huge—but still
swelling—organism. It was just past eleven-thirty. The old year was
guttering.
"Look at those shitters!" He cackled his shrill, excited laugh, finished his
beer, and went downstairs for a fresh six-pack. I sat in my chair and thought
about Welch and Repperton, Trelawney, Stanton, Vandenberg, Darnell. I
thought about how Arnie—or whatever Arnie had become—thought that he
and Leigh had just had an unimportant lovers' spat and how they would end
the school year getting married, just like in those greasy love-ballads from
the Nifty Fifties.
And oh God I had such a case of the creeps.
We saw the New Year in.
Arnie produced a couple of noisemakers and party favors—the kind that go
bang and then release a cloud of tiny crepe streamers. We toasted 1979 and
talked a little more on neutral subjects such as the Phillies' disappointing
collapse in the playoffs and the Steelers' chances of going all the way to the
Super Bowl.
The bowl of popcorn was down to the old maids and the burny-bottoms when
I took myself in hand and asked one of the questions I had been avoiding.
"Arnie? What do you think happened to Darnell?"
He glanced at me sharply, then glanced back at the TV, where couples with
New Year's confetti in their hair were dancing. He drank some more beer.
"The people he was doing business with shut him up before he could talk too
much. That's what I think happened."
"The people he was working for?"
"Will used to say the Southern Mob was bad," Arnie said, "but that the
Colombians were even worse."
"Who are the
"The Colombians?" Arnie laughed cynically. "Cocaine cowboys, that's who
the Colombians are. Will used to claim they'd kill you if you even looked at
one of their women the wrong way—and sometimes if you looked at her the
right way. Maybe it was the Colombians. It was messy enough to be them."
"Were you running coke for Darnell?"
He shrugged. "I was running
stuff
for Will. I only moved coke for him once
or twice, and I thank Christ that I didn't have anything worse than untaxed
cigarettes when they picked me up. They caught me dead-bang. Bad shit. But
if the situation was the same, I'd probably do it again. Will was a dirty,
scuzzy old sonofabitch, but in some ways he was okay." His eyes grew
veiled, strange. "Yeah, in some ways he was okay. But he knew too much.
That's why he got wasted. He knew too much… and sooner or later he would
have said something, Probably it was the Colombians. Crazy fuckers."
"I don't get you. And it's not my business, I suppose."
He looked at me, grinned, and winked. "It was Vietnam," he said. "At least, it
was supposed to be. There was a guy named Henry Buck. He was supposed
to rat on me. I was supposed to rat on Will. And then—the big casino—Will
was supposed to rat on the people down South that were selling him the dope
and the fireworks and cigarettes and booze. Those were the people Ju—the
cops really wanted, Especially the Colombians."
"And you think they killed him?"
He looked at me flatly. "Them or the Southern Mob, sure. Who else?"
I shook my head.
"Well," he said, "Let's have another beer and then I'll give you a lift home. I
enjoyed this, Dennis, I really did." There was a ring of truth in that, but Arnie
would never have made a dorky comment like "I enjoyed this, I really did."
Not the old Arnie.
"Yeah, me too, man."
I didn't want another beer, but I took one anyway. I wanted to put off the
inevitable moment of getting into Christine. This afternoon it had seemed a
necessary step to sample the atmosphere of that car itself if there was any
atmosphere to sample. Now it seemed a frightening and crazy idea. I felt the
secret of what Leigh and I were becoming to each other like a large,
breakable egg in my head.
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