By Jen Sincero Published by Running Press

particularly active, I bring in a mantra to chase them out. I repeat a word
or phrase in my mind like “love” or “thank you” or “yes, please” or
“om”—something that makes me feel good and is fairly neutral, but you
could use a mantra like “meatloaf” I guess if that’s your thing.
5. Try and do it first thing in the morning so you’re not distracted by
whatever the day brings. You’ll also be more connected having just
woken up from sleeping.
6. If there’s something in your life that you’re working on or through, you
can set an intention/ask for help during your meditation practice.
Meditating is about receiving information from The Universe; setting
intentions and praying are about sending information out to The Universe.
There are two ways you can do this: A) Start with a question, something
like, How do I deal with my pain-in-the-ass teenage son? And see what, if
any, answers download while you meditate, or B) Meditate first, open up
the channel, clear out the chatter, and then ask your question in a space of
clarity and connection and see what, if anything, comes to you.
GUIDED MEDITATION
There are countless CDs and DVDs that various hippies and guru types have
made  over  the  years  to  walk  you  through  meditations.  I  suggest  taking  the
guided route when you’re first starting out if you’re having trouble wrangling

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your  mind  into  submission.  They  make  great  training  wheels  and  I  still  use
them occasionally, especially if I want to focus on something specific.
There  are  also  guided  meditation  centers  all  over  the  place,  and  it’s  really
nice every once in a while to meditate in a group— you can really feed off that
energy and get the discipline to sit there for an extended period of time. Do a
search  for  meditation  centers  and  ashrams  in  your  area.  Sometimes  yoga
studios hold guided meditations, too.
CHANTING
Chanting  is  also  a  great  way  to  get  into  a  meditative  state.  You  can  repeat  a
mantra over and over out loud on your own or, if you prefer to avoid getting
busted  and  very  possibly  ridiculed,  you  can  do  it  in  a  group  by  attending  a
Kirtan meditation class. Kirtan meditation involves call-and-response chanting
of Sanskrit mantras or devotional songs, and you can attend classes at a yoga
studio  or  meditation  center.  Also  check  out  Transcendental  Meditation
instruction, a form that involves repeating mantras and sitting twice a day for
around twenty minutes at a time.
I’ve had some pretty profound experiences while meditating; I’ve seen the
walls melt around me, felt like I was levitating, and have experienced such a
state  of  euphoria  that  it  almost  hurt.  I’ve  also  had  extremely  un-profound
experiences;  I’ve  fallen  asleep,  spent  the  entire  time  squirming  and  thinking
about  what  to  make  for  lunch,  and  have  been  totally  in  The  Zone,  and  then
realized I was in The Zone, and thought Awesome, I’m in The Zone! Thereby
pulling myself out of The Zone.
The important thing is that you keep showing up. Even if you’re only in The
Zone  for  one  collective  minute  out  of  the  thirty  minutes  you’ve  been  sitting
there, it will eventually start making a notable difference in your life.
I  think  meditation  is  even  more  essential  now  that  we  have  all  this
technology at our fingertips and distraction has become a way of life. While I
truly believe that we, as a species, are becoming more and more conscious, I’m
amazed by how, at the same time, our attention spans are rapidly shrinking. I
was playing tennis the other day with someone who got a text, pulled out his
phone, and checked it in the middle of a point. It’s astonishing that we can still
speak in full sentences.
Aside  from  being  one  of  the  most  powerful  tools  in  our  consciousness-
raising  toolbox,  meditation  is  a  much-needed  respite  from  the  madness,  and

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will help us from becoming a bunch of scatterbrained ding-dongs as we zoom
around our brave, and extremely exciting, new world.

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CHAPTER 11:
YOUR BRAIN IS YOUR BITCH
Mind is the master power that molds and makes
And man is Mind and evermore he takes
The tool of Thought and, shaping what he wills
Brings forth a thousand joys, a thousand ills.
He thinks in secret, and it comes to pass:
Environment is but his looking glass.