After the quake blind willow, sleeping woman dance dance dance



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More than anything in
any 
world
, she repeated to herself. 
“Even if I say it’s too dangerous, and refuse to contact Tengo, you’ll still go to that 
apartment to see him.” 
“I’m sure I will.” 
“And no one can stop you.” 
“It’s pointless to try.” 
Tamaru paused for a moment. “What message would you like me to give Tengo?” 
“Come to the slide after dark. After it gets dark, anytime is fine. I will be waiting. 
If you tell him Aomame said this, he’ll understand.” 
“Okay. I’ll let him know. 
Come to the slide after dark
.” 
“If he has something important he doesn’t want to leave behind, tell him to bring it 
with him. But tell him he has to be able to keep both hands free.” 
“Where are you going to take that luggage?” 
“Far away,” Aomame said. 
“How far away?” 
“I don’t know,” Aomame said. 
“All right. As long as Madame gives her permission, I’ll let Tengo know. And I 
will do my best to keep you safe. But there’s still danger here. We’re dealing with 
desperate men. You need to protect yourself.” 
“I understand,” Aomame said quietly. Her palm still lay softly on her abdomen. 
Not just myself
, she thought. 
After she hung up, she collapsed onto the sofa. She closed her eyes and thought about 
Tengo. She couldn’t think of anything else. Her chest felt tight, and it hurt, but it was 
a good sort of pain. It was the kind of pain she could put up with. Tengo was so close, 
almost within reach. Less than a ten-minute walk away. The very thought warmed her 
to her core. 
Tengo is a bachelor, and teaches math at a cram school. He lives in a 
neat, humble little apartment. He cooks, irons, and is writing a long novel
. Aomame 
envied Tamaru. If it were possible, she would like to get into Tengo’s apartment like 
that, when he was out. Tengo’s Tengo-less apartment. In the deserted silence she 
wanted to touch each and every object there—check out how sharp his pencils were, 


768
hold his coffee cup, inhale the odor of his clothes. She wanted to take that step first, 
before actually coming face-to-face with him. 
Without that prefatory knowledge, if they were suddenly together, just the two of 
them, she couldn’t imagine what she should say. The thought made it hard to breathe, 
and her mind went blank. There were too many things. Still, when it came down to it, 
perhaps nothing needed to be said. The things she most wanted to tell him would lose 
their meaning the moment she put them into words. 
All she could do now was simply wait—calmly, with eyes wide open. She 
prepared a bag so she could run outside as soon as she spotted Tengo. She stuffed an 
oversized black leather shoulder bag with everything she would need so she wouldn’t 
have to come back here. There weren’t all that many things. Some cash, a few 
changes of clothes, and the Heckler & Koch, fully loaded. That was about it. She put 
the bag where she could get to it at a moment’s notice. She took her Junko Shimada 
suit from the hanger in the closet and, after checking that it wasn’t wrinkled, hung it 
on the wall in the living room. She also took out the white blouse that went with the 
suit, stockings, and her Charles Jourdan high heels. And the beige spring coat. The 
same outfit she was wearing when she climbed down the emergency stairway on 
Metropolitan Expressway No. 3. The coat was a bit thin for a December evening, but 
she had no other choice. 
After getting all this ready, she sat in the garden chair on the balcony and looked 
out through the slit in the screen at the slide in the park. Tengo’s father died late 
Sunday night. A minimum of twenty-four hours had to elapse between the time a 
person died and the time they could be cremated. She was sure there was a law that 
said that. Tuesday would be the earliest they could do the cremation. Today was 
Tuesday. The earliest Tengo would be back in Tokyo from 

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