Zulfiyaqurolboyqizi zulfiya kurolboy kizi

A VICTIM OF LONELINESS

After Ulfat aka's death, Aunt Tamara was left alone ... Although they had no children, they did not live bad with her husband for about 40 years.When a couple is leaning on each other after having no children.It is not easy for a widow to get used to the tragic loss of a lover one. After her husband's death, Aunt Tamara was left alone in a two-room house, which used to look like a parrot's cage, that`s why she felt alone. The relatives were on their way, too, and all of them were preoccupied with life's anxieties, and did not think of Aunt Tamara, but only went in the mornings before going to work or to the painting.This situation lasted until Ulfat aka's forties.Then their steps were restrained.No one cared about the woman, who was completely alone.

"She must be worried about herself," said Aunt Tamara, remembering the indifference of her relatives as she began to harass them.
Four or five years ago, when her husband's sister, who had many children, wanted to gave one of her adult sons, Aunt Tamara refused.Because the little sister had made a condition: "You will teach my son and provide him with a new house!"Aunt Tamara didn't like that.After all, if her husband is an ordinary worker in a factory, and he earns money from month to month, how can he take care of a child, teach him, and marry him?Wouldn't a sister who is worried about her brother do well if she says goodbye, that is, if she teach her son, gives him, higher eductionm, marries him, and then adopts him? - No!Aunt Tamara replied sharply to her husband.
"I know very well that Dilora is trying to give us her son to relieve her anxiety."That's why we can't adopt a son!
Her grateful husband did not say a word, but he was very sad.As if on cue, he was shoked and sad.Aunt Tamara felt it, but did not want to give up. "Well, let's say we adopted Dilora's son," said Aunt Tamara, trying to prove her point."But how do we feed him?"A strong guy?One day when I went home, I saw the boy take out two loaves of bread and ask his mother, "What else can I eat?"he asked.How do we feed a child who is not satisfied with two loaves of bread?How can you feed a person who is always hungry?
"Perhaps this is also a grace of God," said Ulfat aka softly.
"Who would give their child to someone else if God didn't mind?"Isn't that a problem?We need to think ... Maybe God ... "I'm done thinking!"If there is a God, He will give it to us first!“Ask yourself ”said Aunt Tamara, interrupting her husband.Ulfat aka was silent. He did not speak again. But, as always, he went on to say, "Perhaps God is sending His blessings to us through others?" According to Aunt Tamara, her grateful husband may have been upset at the time, but he did not protest and did not even try to continue. Aunt Tamara was well aware of her husband's behavior, and after such a horrible statement, Ulfat aka was able to give up any peaceful dreams. Because he doesn't believe in himself. And again, these would mean that you have to spend for these processes. If nothing else works! The fact that they have been working for only two people for so many years and have learned to cope with the cost of two people gave them a reason. They were used to living only for themselves. It seemed to them that worrying about a third person was a huge, difficult problem to solve. Unlike some, they were reluctant to take risks. Aunt Tamara, in particular, could not digest the fact that her sister-in-law Dilora gave birth year after year without thinking about her back.
Is it enough to raise nine children?Even after growing up, children’s worries don’t end.
Now it's time to think about their future.You can't live for a minute in this situation! Dilora may have been upset with her brother for rejecting the offer, but she didn't reveal it.
"I felt sorry for you and told you to leave my son."Well, you know.I don't have any kids left on the street!
Yes, she said the same thing.It is obvious that Dilora is upset!Aunt Tamara's tongue itched, "You're going to give up your baby when you can't take care of it!"He tried to cut off his sister-in-law, but at the last minute he restrained himself."Well, my husband's honor has spared him," she reassured herself.
From then on, Dilora did not talk about the child at all and came home from time to time.
Ulfat aka thought for two or three days and finally broke his heart to Aunt Tamara: "We did the right thing by not adopting Dilora's son."If we didn't feed the baby well, if we didn't dress him well, we would be left in the lurch!After all, a child is an innocent angel, and it is a sin not to be able to fulfill his dreams and demands! That's what makes a couple so similar.They could not have hoped that God would give them their share.But he never tired of dreaming and waiting for a miracle to happen.When his dreams came true, he would quench his fears. Although they had lived together for 40 years, Aunt Tamara could not understand what was going on in her husband's mind.Only because his thoughts on some issues came together did he conclude, "I know what kind of man my husband is," and even in the event of an accident, Ulfat aka knew what to say before his death: "We lived well and meaningfully, Tamara.Thank you for that! ”But all of a sudden, the opposite happened ... One day, Ulfat aka was trying to get the necessary documents for his retirement, but suddenly he fell ill.The flu was not like the flu, the flu was like the flu;he had a slight fever.
Ulfat aka refused to go to the hospital.Aunt Tamara looked back as if she didn't want to hear him talk about it.Just the morning of her death, when Aunt Tamara brought boiling milk, she saw Ulfat aka punching him in the forehead and crying silently ... Aunt Tamara was weird, but she called a doctor anyway.The doctor came and vaccinated the patient, but did not say anything specific;he muttered in response to her aunt's question. That day, Ulfat aka calmed down, drank half a cup of milk, closed his eyes to sleep and did not open them again.
The doctor who gave the certificate for the burial said that Ulfat aka died of a heart attack.Aunt Tamara's heart sank when she heard this.According to him, the doctor made a mistake in making the diagnosis.Are there any doctors today?They do not differentiate between meningitis and migraine.
It is impossible for Ulfat aka to have a heart attack. After all, the grateful never once complained from the heart. By the way, why should Ulfat aka have a heart attack? A man who has no problems other than worrying about himself and his wife can have such a serious illness! Here's Dilora's husband saying, "She's going to have a heart attack soon!" deb. Nine kids! That's why Dilora wears the same dress for five years! It doesn't matter where you live. It's a shame to invite two guests to a wedding in such a house. Dilora and her husband work day and night, throwing things in their hands like ants, but they are never two. Is that life? What else did poor Dilora see besides the faces of her nine children? He probably doesn't know any smell other than urine. "I live too!" his heart was filled with pride.
Aunt Tamara will never enjoy such a life.True, he never gave up on a child, but frankly, he never raised the number of children to nine.One boy and one girl.That's enough.No more.There is only one or two characters left in this world.Who needs a lot of low-quality "products" ?!
The grateful husband had a brother named Artikali. He had four sons. But all four were disabled. Aunt Tamara's heart sank when she saw the crooked (astagfurullo!) Children in the wheelchair, one bent over and the other bent over. Wouldn't it be better for God to pick them up than to give them children who burn your eyes and hurt your heart? Aunt Tamara was neither an atheist nor a god, but she faced such an unpleasant sight. when she came she would not notice that he was blaspheming God. In the end, he would not regret it, even if he felt it. If a gift makes you cry without making your eyes and heart happy ... what is the point of such a gift? Aunt Tamara immediately, without hesitation, abandoned the child if a child was born in her womb and the intelligence of the doctors revealed that the child was born with a disability. Indeed, it is better to burn a disabled child once than to look him in the face a thousand times a day!
Three or four years ago, Ortiqali aka was forced to sell his downtown hall and move to his village.His wife had a heart attack, and the city's air was unhealthy.Here is the consequence of giving birth to disabled children!Ulfat aka, who heard that his brother was moving to the village, said something similar.Then he shrugged:
At the same time, Aunt Tamara was saying the same thing.Do you now have a clearer understanding of the similarities in the couple's behavior?Have you ever thought, "These are made for each other"?Perhaps Aunt Tamara's words will make your mind clearer: “We are like a product with the same ingredients.We're only in two containers! ”Do you understand now?Yeah Al that sounds pretty crap to me, Looks like BT aint for me either.Until her husband's death ...
By the way, the same diagnostician, who represents modern doctors who do not differentiate between ordinary migraine and meningitis, said that Aunt Tamara's kitchen came out when she heard this: "Ulfat aka has been speechless for two days ..." What do you say to that? ? No, that's not true. The doctor said this to make the poor fellow, who was shocked by the unexpected shock, even more confused than the category of people who like to panic people's hearts! Her husband was speechless two days ago, didn't Aunt Tamara notice? No, it can't be! If Ulfat aka was really speechless, he would talk to Aunt Tamara, even if he was gesturing. But he did not. Worst of all, in both cases, Ulfat left his wife in the lurch. He took with him the last words that would help his pregnant wife. “We lived well and meaningfully, Tamara. Thank you for that! .. ” Even if she gestured, Aunt Tamara would notice immediately. Is it possible that Ulfat aka at the last moment regretted his forty years of life with Aunt Tamara?
It is said that tears flow only when the heart is full of sorrow.Otherwise, why did he punch her in the forehead, why did he shed silent tears? That was the question that shook Aunt Tamara day and night.“Why?Why did he do that?What did he regret? ”Aunt Tamara's thought was over."I have never regretted spending my young life with a barren man as a healthy woman!He gets up at midnight or before dawn."I was twenty-seven when I heard the doctors say, 'Your husband can never have children, don't hope.'I would like a divorce.But I didn’t.The cursed fear gave way.I didn't want to leave my second husband because I was afraid that he would be as kind and loyal as my brother Ulfat. Really, what if I met a man who was bleeding from a whip? For my brother Ulfat, my word was the law. I'm used to it. My brother Ulfat was so kind and sweet that I thought he was the only person in the world and I believed in him. My heart pounded when I heard that someone had beaten his wife. It seemed to me that all the men, except my brother Ulfat, were very cruel, mean, and hard-hearted, and did not see women as human beings. True, there would be quarrels in our house from time to time, but at such moments my voice would be loud, and my poor brother Ulfat would be busy making coffee to calm me down. When I drank hot coffee, I immediately lost my temper ... He kept his salary in his hand without taking a penny.
When I said, "I'll do it," he didn't get angry like some men do.
"Sit at home satisfied with what I found!" he wouldn't shout, but he would be upset. It would be very upsetting. "I've been at home since I touched you. If I got a job somewhere, I would become a professional. What day will I see you if you leave? ” I laughed and spoke in a way that didn't disappoint. Then my poor husband said, “I will never leave you. If we have to leave, we will go together! ” he would answer. I believe him. He lied ... He left me alone! Again, in an incomprehensible, mysterious way ... I'm sorry, I can't get to the bottom of it, why is my husband so sad before his death? Didn't we break up when we were young, when the door to opportunity was wide open? Or because we rejected an offer from an acquaintance who advised us to take a baby from an orphanage and help in this work? .. To be honest, a small group of two although I was the male queen of the country, I did not oppose this proposal at the time. But my husband did not dare. "Will someone's child be a real child for us?" The dubious thought prevented him from coming to an agreement. That bothered me too.After all, think for yourself that even if you work hard and give a piece of meat to a person after your rest and pleasure, your child will not recognize you as a parent when you lose all your strength and need help. or if he bleeds and becomes a thief or a pianist! There is such a thing as a gene. Besides, a good man would never give a good child to an orphanage, and all sorts of thoughts like that would not give him peace. In addition, in those days, when a foster child was growing up, a video was shown on television showing him having an ossuary and beating his foster parents with an ax. It turned out that the real mother of the boy was mentally ill. She will be deprived of her maternity rights by a court for trying to kill a baby as soon as she takes it in her arms because her child looks like a creature. It was a very scary movie. Everyone who casts their eyes upon it, wants a go. My husband couldn't watch this movie because he was at work.I just told him a brief summary. Nevertheless, I wholeheartedly agreed to adopt a child from the orphanage. Unfortunately, my husband refused. True, at first it seemed like a bit of a nightmare, but for some reason it suddenly went awry. I think that horror movie was the reason. When I couldn't tell my husband about the movie ... My husband's laziness brought me back. Raising a child seemed like a huge, insurmountable challenge to us. We couldn't stop because we were both worried that we would make someone's child sick, that we would die, God forbid, because we couldn't play. So, my husband has no right to be a bully to me when it comes to adopting an orphan! For the most part of my life, I did not disrespect my husband, I did not betray him, I thought about everything, weighed everything and lived without losing sight of it! It is true that I was against my husband's decision to adopt only Dilora's son. Did my husband regret it and shed tears? Woe is me! It's crazy to be like that ... "
But it is impossible not to think. After being alone all day and night
I don't even have a dog to worry about. You don't have to rely on your neighbors. The five-story house they lived in was designed for small families and consisted of one- and two-bedroom apartments. Such apartments are often occupied by small families until they settle down. Then they move to a bigger house or yard. Only Ulfat aka and Tamara aunt lived in this "dom". Others come, go, come, go. Is that why Aunt Tamara just greets some of her neighbors on the street and doesn't even know others? Neighbors did not even know that Ulfat aka had died. They did not even go to the blessing. Who knows, maybe newcomers are reluctant to enter the blessing without meeting? Maybe it's because Aunt Tamara didn't go in and out with them? It is true that Aunt Tamara does not go out with her neighbors. Even though her heart is torn by loneliness, she does not knock on any of her neighbors' doors. Because once he stepped in and paved the way, he drove some of his neighbors out of the house! No, they don't go to ask Aunt Tamara. If you pay attention, there will always be a group of people who live by asking for a loan. "Give me four potatoes!""Give me a box of matches!" Is repentance a box of matches? Aunt Tamara also lives on her husband's salary. No extra income. But at that age, he hadn't asked anyone for a penny! Aunt Tamara doesn't like them very much because she knows her neighbors well. She prefers to sit alone than to talk to such people. She listens to the sound of footsteps going up and down the stairs ... These are the footsteps of people returning home from work, school or ... elsewhere in the middle of the night. They walk down the stairs carefully, so as not to disturb others.
They are very polite people. She enjoys being around and talking to people like that. But they probably don't even know that Aunt Tamara exists. What would he do next? Nailoj reads newspapers and books. He reads a lot. But after her husband's death, she stopped reading. Her hand doesn't work, she just thinks. He listens to the silence. But he can't pick anything. Just silence, dumb silence ... But at night, only rats can be heard screaming in the basement. And again ... he feels and think of death ripening behind the door. Oh, I wish that lick would come in sooner ... Aunt Tamara's anxious mind was slowly filled with horrible thoughts. She didn't even want to live. “Am I waiting for death to come? May I call her? I have no work to do in this world. Who needs to live as if they were buried alive in a house that is For some reason, the last thought softened Aunt Tamara's heart. His brain was wet. Now, after losing her, she realizes how much she is attached to her grateful husband. It was as if he had climbed to the top and looked around, and suddenly his heart was filled with fear. Because no one was around! It was hard to live in that situation. It was painful. There is no limit to the pain ... Loneliness, sorrow, longing - all come together and turn his heart into a stone ... She cries out "Dod" and wants to go somewhere else. But where was he going? One day, Aunt Tamara noticed that she was thinking about a quick-acting poison without realizing it ... it was as if she had a nightmare and woke up scared. Fortunately, there is no such thing at home ... Another evening he shouted at the rats in the basement, who couldn't stand the urge to talk to anyone: "You idiots, come out here without screaming in the basement!" Am I crazy and in faith because I get anxiety attacks? What blessings would you have had if you had lived in a shabby basement? The rats suddenly fell silent, as if they heard his voice. "Yeah, why are your voices muffled?" Said Aunt Tamara. "Did you think that the seed of the human race had dried up in the deserted catacombs?" I'm still there, I'm alive! I'm just so bored ... my heart is pounding ... I used to read books and walk the streets when I was bored. Now I don't know any of that. Eh, now ...as empty as an Suddenly, Aunt Tamara was frightened by her own voice and tried to regain consciousness.But now a more frightening thought pierced his heart: "What the hell, am I going crazy?" Aunt Tamara was afraid of going crazy.So she decided to go to Dilora's house."If they let me in, I'll move out completely," he said."Just don't talk about the house!" The family of eleven greeted the unexpected guest with open faces.In particular, in addition to Dilora's two eldest children, the heads of seven of her cheerful children reached the sky.To their delight, one of the children dragged Aunt Tamara out, and the other sat on her knees and said, "Tell me a story, but!"he would say.open grave? Would my husband be happy if I went to him early ... ”
Although Aunt Tamara was upset that she could not drink a cup of tea, she calmed down and tried to justify the children: “The poor people are happy because they haven't seen each other for a long time. In two or three days I'll be "puffy, ugly." After that, I eat and drink ready-made food and enjoy it, and no one will have to deal with me! ” he reassured himself. Dilora didn't care. Tamara asked about the situation with her aunt, set the table in front of her, and then began to settle a land dispute with her husband, who was sitting as if completely forgetting the guest. "I have a lot of children. You have to give us the land first, didn't you tell the chairman?" said Dilora to her husband. "Good-bye to Musabek as we stand!" We used to play when the kids were only four, and we had nothing to do with the fairy! "I told you, just as you told me," said the tall man, his face flushed. "What can I do if he won't listen?""I'm going to the office tomorrow!""Come on, let's go," he said lightly. "You can do it yourself from the beginning." I'm speechless, you know. "Yeah, when you finally admit you can't do anything," Dilora's voice sounded solemn. "You wouldn't have been so upset if you had admitted that before!"
Dilora's face trembled, as if her face were blackened by the sun, her face was wrinkled, her forehead was wrinkled, and her breasts were like a child's. shoulders broad; each breast is like a handkerchief, and the wrists are like palms. She had the strength and energy to bite a man with one fist, and she was one of those people who knew nothing but hard work and earning money. For some reason, the aunt began to regret that she had come here, thinking, "Well, I'm here all the time, I didn't tell you I would live with you anymore.""Look at your beloved son-in-law!" said Dilora, looking at Aunt Tamara. "All he can do is run and weed." He doesn’t know how to compromise with someone. Like other men, he can't get paid even if he beats himself up. Every time you look at it, the bullet hits me. Aunt Tamara suddenly did not know what to say. Dilora has never complained to her husband or children since she got married. "I don't know what it is," said Aunt Tamara, just to keep quiet. "What place are you talking about?""Why don't you understand?" Dilora said in surprise. "We've been quarreling for a long period of time!"
Aunt Tamara's voice was heavy with her sister-in-law's voice.
“What happened to him? "... you're your favorite groom!" deb. I never said that. He couldn't do that when his brother was with me ... " Aunt Tamara stared at the ground, her lashes fluttering. When Dilora realized something, she suddenly changed her tone: "We have land for large families," he said shyly. "If it's true, the land should be given to us first, right?" But we are tearing the soup out of your mouth because of your son-in-law's emptiness! As always, I can get involved. I was wondering if I'd ever mess with a man with a woman's head ... "You're not the only one running to the office," he added. "I see Musabek and Egamberdi's wives in front of the office every day." Now is the time for women to talk. Once upon a time, you would sit at home wrapped in a shawl. We were walking down the street ... The "beloved groom" works unpleasantly. Aunt Tamara involuntarily sniffed. "Die without a man, look what you found right now!" he muttered to himself. "With a breast like yours ..."
Dilora began to make a mockery of her husband in order to tie him up, and a foot fell into the middle of the table. Aunt Tamara shuddered and pulled herself back. It was a worn-out, old-fashioned shoes. The beloved bridegroom sat still. "Destroy your seed!" With that, Dilora took the curse off the table and threw it over her shoulder. One of the boys, who was playing loudly in the hallway, came to the house laughing. Dilora turned to Aunt Tamara as if nothing had happened. "If it's like you ..." she continued, and there was a sudden rumble in the hallway, followed by a young boy's ugly, rough, sobbing. This time Aunt Tamara was terrified and involuntarily spat on her collar. The "beloved groom" stretched his legs towards Aunt Tamara, slipped the teapot on his side and poured tea into his cup. Dilora's condition did not change. She picked up the empty teapot her husband had handed her and looked at the door. "Absamat," he said. A fifteen-year-old boy appeared on the doorstep with his hair disheveled and his eyes wide with joy at what he had done. "Well, pour out the candle, then rinse it well, and make some fresh tea." The teenager sniffed, grabbed the teapot, and hurried out. Aunt Tamara was still panting, swallowing her breath. Dilora began from the beginning.
"If I were on the outskirts of a city like yours, I wouldn't be so upset if I had only one 'dom' ..." Aunt Tamara's face was hot from the suffocation. "At least don't talk about it until I'm dead," he told his imaginary sister-in-law. "Then the house will be yours anyway!""Here," said a roaring voice. Dilora's son was putting the teapot on the edge of the table. "I barely boiled it when the gas ran out.""Yes, that's it, that's it, don't thank me for a teapot," Dilora jerked her son. "Now wipe two onions with four potatoes.""Will you give me a job?" murmured the young man.
"Tell your daughters.""You won't die, I told you!" The frowning young man left the room, muttering something. Aunt Tamara thought, "Will I get rid of the kitchen if I burn it down?" If I'm not mistaken, both Dilora and her husband heard it. But they didn’t break the pin either. Aunt Tamara's heart sank. The young man was really annoyed as if he was burning down the kitchen in anger. "I didn't know their children were so disorderly," thought Aunt Tamara. "Dilora's carelessness!" What if that kid really set the kitchen on fire? Or does he know his son won't do it? But it seems that the boy is not suffering from anything. If they like it, they will burn it. Then they sit down ... and warm themselves by the fire ... ” The flesh of the guest who imagined the scene shrank. "Give me your cup without lying down!" Dilora looked at her husband angrily. "No," said the man, handing him the cup. "But don't return the tea." The second teapot should be poured without returning. Dilora's eyes narrowed in anger, but she found the strength to make fun of her husband: "All right, Grandpa, all right!"
The young woman poured the rest of the candle from under the bowl into her bowl. And then when I started pouring tea from the teapot ... There was a squeaking sound, and a piece of mud splashed from the kettle and fell into the bowl. "Oh, let him die!" Look at your aunt's case, 'said Dilora, turning to Aunt Tamara with a wide laugh. "Looks like he's trying to wash the kettle with mud." That's what a boy does. Aunt Tamara was now really angry. Isn't that disrespectful to the guest? What, did he come here because he was hungry? At least I didn't go down without explaining myself first. But when the "bugs" sitting in front of him don't see him as a guest ...
From her seat, Dilora shouted at the door again: "Abtikarim, hov Abtikarim, don't cook the teapot!"
Rinse your stomach well and make some fresh tea, baby! Aunt Tamara bled to death. Condition got up and tried to snatch the teapot from his sister-in-law's hand. But ... Although her liver did not see Aunt Tamara as a guest, she suddenly remembered that she was a guest. "And the guest must know his honor!" The aunt gritted her teeth. Half an hour later, Absamat, who loves to wash the porcelain teapot with mud, came in carrying a large ceramic bowl with steam coming out. The dish is simply - fried potatoes. It looks like a sack that encloses with a drawstring. Aunt Tamara, who was still angry, asked, "Didn't you add mud to it?" She wanted to just taste the food, but he knew she had a bite in his mouth ... Admittedly, Aunt Tamara had never eaten so much in her life! The more you eat, the more you want to eat. Otherwise, there is no meat in it, no buttocks. Not even simple cumin. But ... very tasty ...
" I'm going to the office," said Dilora in the morning.
"If I don't go now, then the chairman can't be caught - he will leave the field." You can be the head of the kids and eat and drink what you enjoy. "Will you be back soon?" Aunt Tamara asked hurriedly. "I'll be back in half an hour."
Aunt Tamara thought that the groom would go with Dilora. But he was stubborn when he saw her walking in the yard. He was upset with his sister-in-law: "He could have been taken away. Am I going to stare at him until he comes? ” Aunt Tamara's nerves got worse. Even though he hadn't had breakfast yet, he stayed in the room like a quarrelsome child. At one point, the door slammed open, and the groom's tired face appeared across the room. "Otherwise, I'll go to a field," he said as he stood up, trying to get in, at least "Did you sleep well?" without even thinking about it. "I'll be around in an hour or two." If I don't work, I'll go back to lunch. "All right, all right, all right," said Aunt Tamara hastily. The door slammed shut. Aunt Tamara sighed deeply. Interestingly, it had only been a day since he had come here, and yet he felt that he might have missed his more boring but peaceful life. Her precious flowers and precious vases were visible to her eyes. Everything in the house is precious and precious ... Each of them has a special taste ... It is worth remembering ... She even remembered the rats that screamed at night and expressed their presence ...
Aunt Tamara thought, "I'm going to have a hard time here." She wanted to leave. Little did she know that they would be greeted in this way. Without a reputation as a human being ... at least ... there was no respect for the house that would be left for them ... Isn't a whole house a property worth honoring a gentleman? ..
In addition, no matter how hard she tried, she could not understand or digest her sister-in-law's life, which was a mixture of ordinary life worries. For example, when she was in Dilora's place, she focused on raising children. By the way, the upbringing began first of all ... with her husband. “Be a man, behave like a real man! Take on the burdens of life! ” to her husband. He used to teach his children to behave like they did yesterday ... It was as if someone had tapped him on the shoulder. Aunt Tamara raised her head for the first time. Opposite him was Dilora's five-year-old nephew, Asadbek. "Did you say something, son?" Aunt Tamara asked kindly. "I'm hungry, but," murmured the boy. "Haven't you had breakfast yet?""My mother and father went to the fields." Aunt Tamara was surprised: "They'll go to the fields, but they haven't fed you before?""I'll be right back." Aunt Tamara looked at her watch. "If it's coming soon ... Come on." Aunt Tamara took Asadbek's hand and went out, asking her niece: - Did your brothers and sisters go to school? - Yes. "Are you alone?" Won't you go to kindergarten? "I'm not alone." As soon as Aunt Tamara appeared on the porch, four children, who were playing in the yard, came running and surrounded her: "Cook the milk, but!... Milk ... Porridge ..." - Milk?
Where do I get milk? -said Aunt Tamara, who had entered the kitchen and was disturbed by the commotion. "You can milk a cow!" Don't you know that? said one of the boys. The bullet pierced her heart, shaking Aunt Tamara's whole body. He looked older than Asadbek, at least eight or nine years old. Wouldn't this boy, whose tongue is already so poisonous, take Dilora for a penny when he grows up? What a sight to behold! No, Dilora didn't raise them at all. He gave birth to children, fed them, clothed them, vassals. That's probably how people lived in primitive society. Is it possible to expect kindness from uneducated children? Repent, repent a thousand times! .. "At least give me some sugar!"
Aunt Tamara blinked and looked at the boy, who was full of poison. He frowned. She could not bear such blatant disrespect. He wanted to reach out and give the boy his manners. But he calmed down. After all, he is a guest in this apartment. Yeah Al that sounds pretty crap to me, Looks like BT aint for me either. "Come on, everyone," Aunt Tamara ordered the children. "You'll drink the milk when you come." Because I don't know how to milk a cow. But I can make sugar. The children ran towards the gray with a roar. Dilora, who left in half an hour, was not heard from in the morning. It's almost noon, but we still don't know. By noon, Aunt Tamara had a headache. Ever since the morning, the worries about feeding the children, gathering the dishes and washing the dishes have made the aunt very tired. Unbeknownst to Dilora, Aunt Tamara entered the house and threw herself on the bed. He couldn't stand the pain in his head. At one point, it was as if someone was gently stroking her forehead, and Aunt Tamara trembled and opened her eyes. - You ... "Which side of your head hurts?" Asadbek asked kindly. Aunt Tamara stared at him without a word. "If you have a headache here, it doesn't matter if you take medicine." I'd better sleep, I'd like to have a massage. The boy began to stroke his aunt's head with his small hands. "If you're in pain here, you need to take medicine." That's what they do ... Aunt Tamara's tongue was lol. "Sleep well, and I'll rub your head," said the boy. Aunt Tamara closed her eyes and said, "OK." After a while, aunt: "I don't have a headache anymore," he told the boy. "Now you go." In fact, Aunt Tamara was much relieved. But the boy nodded: "I don't want to play." I'd rather watch you than fly. Aunt Tamara's eyes twinkled. “Anyway, I'll stay here! She decided. "I'm moving my house to Dilora." She's so tired, she's used to it coming out of my mouth ... ”Finally, she overcame her insecurities, fears, and whims. However ... Unfortunately, this idea, no matter how firm and unshakable it may seem at the moment, did not last long. After all, an incident that took place in this apartment in the evening was driving Aunt Tamara out of the kitchen.
Dilora's middle son, Abdukarim, beat up a classmate named Nurmat for expressing his love for the girl he was texting, and drowned his mouth and nose in blood. This was not enough, forcing Nurmat to kneel in front of the girl and apologize for the beating. There was a riot ... Nurmat's mother slapped poor Dilora, who was a slender woman with a runny hand. Neighbors intervened and forcibly separated the salt from the iron claws of the loving mother. Aunt Tamara, who had seen the scene with her own eyes, fainted. For a long time she could not stand such riots. He was not even ready to watch such conflicts. If he had been in Dilora's place, he would never have forgiven Abdukarim for such a tragedy. It is true that the mother carries the poor child in her womb for nine months, and when she dies, she returns to this world with her baby. Then let him bring up a piece of flesh with a thousand hardships and sufferings ... And the end is eternal! What's so significant about a life like this? The child is said to be the successor of life. No, in my aunt's opinion, this is a misconception, in fact, a child is an idiot who takes possession of the inheritance and property created by the parents when they die! Dilora is a simple, uneducated woman, one of many. But it is also true that some of the world's greatest people have lost their children at the end of their lives. Who, like Mirzo Ulugbek, extinguished the lamp of life of both the scientist and the king in time? Isn't he a child of his own? "So no need to worry, Tamara!" She began to rub herself. "Live in peace until your time is up." Does it matter if Azroil kills you on the way or invades your house? Don't worry about the oil. It's easy ... It happens in the blink of an eye ... Maybe you lie quietly in your bed, in your warm bed, and take your last breath, that's all. You can hear the faint puff, can't you? That's the decent thing to do, and it should end there. " His thoughts seemed reasonable. Wouldn't it be better to live in peace in his warm house than to be with his sister-in-law and have a heart full of blood? "I used to count the dumplings raw, thinking that I would be able to live happily around them. Fortunately, I didn't give Dilora my house. Otherwise, I would lose both my ready shelter and my peaceful life”.
Aunt Tamara praised herself for being careful about the house and was happy with herself. As always ... The next morning, Aunt Tamara was stunned to see Dilora sitting with her son, as if she had completely forgotten about yesterday's riots. When Dilora realized this, she handed him a cup of tea with a yellow inside: "Are you surprised, Aunt Tamara ?" she said.
Aunt Tamara didn't answer, just sighed deeply. "This is the day we saw you." Don't worry, you'll get used to it. Aunt Tamara, looking at the ground, did not like it. "She seems to think I'm all right ... thank you for taking care of me, sister-in-law, but let your house be yours!" she frowned. Then she turned to his sister-in-law: "I'm going home now." I've had so many guests. I've seen you all, I'm fed up with your love, I'm very disappointed ... Aunt Salt tried to speak sincerely, but the tone of her voice revealed a change in mood. Dilora didn't say a word either. "Won't you stay another day or two?" she asked. The paint is on the tip of the tongue. Aunt Tamara shakes her head. Aunt Tamara's only hope was not Dilora's house. There was another destination. This house belonged to my aunt's sister. True, her sister is no more in this bright world, she died a short time ago, eighteen years ago, and her only memory is a little girl named Yasmina. The girl is married, has two or three children, and is sitting with her parents on. But Aunt Tamara can't bow to her nephew alone. Thankfully, her sister had a cat when she was alive. In fact, it was Yasmina who caused the sisters to fight so hard. Yasmina was eight or nine at the time. The girl spent her holidays with Aunt Tamara. Although she was a single girl, she was very polite and humble. One day, Yasmina accidentally dropped Tamara's vase from her hand and broke it. Aunt Tamara's soul was gone, because the vase was very expensive. The couple had been saving for two years; if such a priceless thing is scattered on the ground, it will hurt anyone, after all; If you can't complete it now! So, Aunt Tamara first hit the girl hard, and then, as if it was not enough, put it on Yasmina's shoulder with a mosquito net in her hand. Not one, but hit several times. It was a simple cloth with a slap-like rubber on a simple dry horn that killed a fly. However, the girl's skin was thin, and the bruises suddenly turned black and blue. When the sister, who saw the incident and saw her daughter's shoulder with her own eyes, hurriedly took Yasmina home, she said something that Aunt Tamara would never forget: "Was the vase so dear, sister?" When you don't give birth, you underestimate the value of a baby! Aunt Tamara, who was bleeding profusely, shouted angrily: "As dear as your daughter is to you, so dear to me!" Her sister suddenly stopped, stared at her sister for a few minutes, and suddenly said: "Well, with your vase ..." The sister seemed to be saying, "Be a double," but at the last second she restrained herself and used a different word: "Survive with your vase."
With that, the sister who led her daughter went out. After that, the relationship between the sisters was broken. Aunt Tamara could not forgive her sister's words: "After you gave birth ...", and as a result, the sisters became faceless. "She saw more than one vase than a child," said Aunt Tamara, realizing that her sister was deeply upset, but she did not want to give in to her liver. "Why does she complain instead of being upset?" After all, the more my sister is attached to her child, the more I realize that I am so attached to the vase, to this house in general, to the things in the house, that I care, that I rub myself with them? .. Someone cries when a child dies. And I cry when my vases are broken or my flowers are dry ... ” Yes, that vase and the vase-like items that filled her house were so dear to Aunt Tamara. When they had children, Aunt Tamara hugged them and looked at the blossoming flowers. Well, this world is not just made up of people. It is not in vain that flowers and various objects were created along with the people. When you think about it and take a closer look at the world you see, you realize that all beings are a series of causes that are intertwined. How could people like Aunt Tamara caress themselves without flowers and vases? But something remains a mystery ... it's hard to understand ... In the past, Aunt Tamara thought about her fate and often felt resentment. Wondering why people like me were born. The thought of being burned out of the world for the rest of his life was unsettling. And for some as a baby gets older, he or she will outgrow this. There seems to be some wisdom in this as well. Only Aunt Tamara doesn't understand it and still doesn't understand ... Her sister could not forgive her then. He didn't even visit before he died. For the sake of her parents' ghosts, Aunt Tamara never thought her sister would die so young. "He'll understand me when the time comes, and one day he'll apologize for being unduly upset," she said, waiting for that day to come. Suddenly, death struck, and the painting took her sister to the other side. Aunt Tamara, who received the news of her death late, flew to her sister's "seven". A world of plans in the back of my mind! What plans? How could a loving hand caress the head of an orphaned niece? Someone has to take refuge in a lonely orphan! Can she marry Yasmina? With all the formalities and customs. So how do you get a girl to turn to you? Aunt Tamara, who was entering the room with tears in her eyes, was surprised that she was in a whirlpool of conflicting thoughts, and she could not understand herself: why am i coming to earth To visit and remember my untimely death, or to carry out my selfish plans? ”
But Aunt Tamara didn't think so. Yasmina was already married, the mother of one child and the other in her womb. Aunt Tamara, who often went to Yasmina and asked her how she was, understood everything. "Time flies!" he whispered involuntarily. At the same time, he felt overwhelmed. However, with the help of her sister's spirit, she decided to spend three or four days with them. After all, he couldn't ask his sister's consent, and at the last minute he couldn't even stand on top and drop a drop of water into his mouth; the poor sister died like no one else; it is true that it is visible to the public until the end of the campaign. But ... Without saying a word, without even shedding a tear, Aunt Tamara suddenly felt as if she had hit a stone wall and smashed it as she ran as she ran into the hate knives in Yasmina's eyes, her whole body staring at her. Yes, there was a world of anger, resentment, sorrow and pain in Yasmina's eyes! Even though so many years have passed, Aunt Tamara's sister and her only nephew still remember that vase story ... At the farewell, Yasmina said: "She knew in that moment that she had an incurable disease." That's why he took me to give you a girl ... - Eh! My own house, my own bed! Aunt Tamara opened the double-locked iron door and went inside, involuntarily uttering these words aloud. She missed her home. He breathed in the damp, slightly damp air. He rubs the walls that are dear to him, to every line. Yasmina gently pressed the crystal vase to her chest instead of the broken one. He covered the window and whispered, touching the leaves to the leaves of the sun-dried flowers: "Aren't you bored without me? I miss you so much! What would I do without you?" I thought, I thought a lot, and finally I came to the conclusion that you are closer to me than my liver! Aunt Tamara pressed her tear-washed face to the petals of the flower and sobbed for a long time, as if she had not been able to cry for a long time. From that day on, Aunt Tamara lived alone again. He would go out only when necessary, and at other times he would be locked in his house as if he were buried alive. He would not get up in the morning as soon as he woke up. It's good that he's trying. And for lunch, of course, he prepares for himself a delicious meal. Aunt Tamara has always eaten strong food at lunch. For dinner, a lighter digestion will satisfy the appetite. "I have to take care of myself so I can live longer in this world!" The thought was in his head. According to Nafsilambri, Aunt Tamara tried to live as carefree, calm and peaceful as possible. In addition to covering all expenses, he would have three or four rubles left over from his pension. What does it take to live long? Peaceful, quiet, carefree life - a guarantee of longevity! We'll see, both Dilora and Yasmina, who are very angry, will end up worrying about their children. Before the age of fifty, they rot like firewood, or suffer from a serious illness and die prematurely. After all, he had seen Dilora's condition and how she lived. And such a life erodes the nerves of any person, destroys her heart, and as a result ... Once their heads touch the wall, they realize that real life is not just about having children and living with their worries. Maybe then their eyes will light up and they will envy Aunt Tamara!
Aunt Tamara was so accustomed to her unique way of life that she was as happy as she found her pleasures as she inspected. He was one hundred percent sure that he would live longer and longer than anyone else. "You didn't know how to live, old man," he would say, imagining himself every night, looking at a picture of Ulfat aka hanging on the wall. "You killed yourself." You shouldn’t have taken everything to heart. You see, I will live another fifty or sixty years. I'll be in the middle of the new century! By then, people like Dilora will be blooming! Ha-ha-ha ... ” Even though Aunt Tamara didn't want to laugh, she tried to laugh and cheer up. She kept her nerves, thinking only of the good. One day he saw a new show on TV called "For those over sixty ..." and became a huge fan of the show. At first glance, it seemed to be a quality, but every word that came out of the mouth of a beginner lady with short hair, dyed eyebrows and an open-collar blouse, as if to compete with a thirty-year-old. She even tried to remember her"facial expressions" and diligently carried out the tasks and advice given during the day without melting or leaving a single one. It was easy to see from the starter's assignments and requirements that the show was not for people over the age of sixty, but for those who actually lived alone. Probably a factor as to why they're doing so poorly and why they're doing so poorly. Because of this show, Aunt Tamara did not lie down and watch TV until she was hungry, drank boiling water dripped with lemon juice. Half an hour later he ate an apple or a pear - pears are better - and sat down for breakfast for exactly sixty minutes. By the way, according to scientists participating in the show, it is better to wake up earlier in the morning. The longer and longer you stay in bed, the more the desire to live in the human body fades. Inactivity even spills groundwater. Move, move and move again! Aunt Tamara, who used to be locked up in the house and rarely went out, came out almost every morning as soon as she woke up. Auntie usually greets the dawn in the school yard. She takes a deep breath, filling his chest with fresh, immaculate air. You need to take a deep breath to get more air into your lungs ... So, Aunt Tamara had a good time to spend her time without boredom and stress.
However ...

It is almost impossible to escape or distract him from the silence, which, as the sun goes over the horizon, bursts in like a witch behind a window, squeezing his heart harder and harder as the darkness darkens, tearing his torso apart. q was. At such times, even the "mirror world" could not help. The blossoming flowers and the antique vase could not be bothered. Aunt Tamara, no matter who she is, wants to spend half an hour with a living soul. At such times, if the person knocking on the door was a murderer with a bloody hand, the aunt would have met him without hesitation. After eight o'clock in the evening, the sound of "knocking" on the "dom" is often not heard. Only those who had just returned from work could be heard walking down the stairs as usual, trying not to make a sound. Doesn't she live on the first floor, she knows everything ... Yes, these people are really very polite people. But lately, that has been the case with Aunt Tamara. "Unless they're so polite!" She said to herself. "Didn't have to go that far ... If you want to hear it, there's no sound ..." At such moments, Aunt Tamara would sigh with regret and longing ... Gradually, at night, Aunt Tamara felt as if she were living in a tomb surrounded by concrete barriers. It was much easier during the day. But ... there is darkness and silence. Silence and darkness. What is the difference from the grave? It is only after midnight that the rats scream, as if to prove that this is not a place for the dead. Apparently, they had found a hole somewhere, and the next time they came to visit Aunt Tamara in the middle of the night. Spilled food, stale bread, and crumbs disappear immediately after eating. One time ... a rat climbed on Aunt Tamara's bed and sniffed her paws, but she couldn't sink her teeth because she was shaking a little. Aunt Tamara didn't bother, even though the honest animals took over the house after midnight.

Surprisingly ... the lady slowly got used to the rats. She even lit a candle shortly before the "guests" arrived. There were two reasons for this. First, when the light is turned on after the rats have entered the room, these restless creatures for some reason flee in silence; and second, that no sharp-eyed man can count the tiny creatures that glisten in the dark. With the help of a lamp, the aunt counted the uninvited guests. However, there were only four of them. "They must be a family," she thought as she watched the animals, her chin resting on her pillow. "That big, black father;" this is a smaller, smaller mother rat. Will the female be gray? These little ones must be babies. Woe to their sweetness ... ”One is black, which means a boy; the other's wool is gray, and it's drawn to its mother, so it's a girl ... Even though every creature's child looks cute ... ” Aunt Tamara didn't notice that she was asleep watching the rats that had taken over the house. When he wakes up in the morning, the house is still empty and quiet, but the sun is shining. Aunt Tamara is now deliberately pouring bread crumbs on the floor. "Don't let the poor bother looking for food ..." One evening, while waiting for the rats, Aunt Tamara woke up frightened. It was as if someone was staring at her from the corner of the room. The aunt looked in that direction. In fact, two steps away stood a gray rat. The mother rat stared at the housewife, her dwarf eyes twinkling. In the distance, baby rats were scurrying around. For some reason, the big black rat was nowhere to be seen. "Yes, animal, did you come to feed your children?" Said Aunt Tamara aloud. "Your husband can't be seen." Where did he go? Can't find the right place, the right place, the right place? If so, I'm sorry. Tell your husband to come here as usual. No one will drive you here. No one is trapping. There is plenty of fruit, don't worry. Do you understand me? Let's go now. The gray rat blinked its black eyes, looked at Aunt Tamara for another moment, and then ran to her children. A smile ran down Beka's face. Looking behind the rat, he said with satisfaction: "You know what I mean, beast," he said. The next evening, Aunt Tamara sprinkled more breadcrumbs and leftovers. At night, the gray rat came again with its young. The black rat was not seen this time either. "Didn't your husband come again?" She asked the animal, which was moving around the room. "Didn't he get sick, rubbed?" Oh ... he's dead, what's the matter ?! No, it's safe and strong ... Yeah, now I know, you must have had a fight. Is that so?
As soon as Aunt Tamara's voice was heard, the gray rat stopped whimpering and stared at the vigilant old woman, reminiscent of an owl whose life was ruined. "Are you fighting too?" She kept asking. "I've seen a lot of fights between cats and dogs." But I didn't pay attention to the rats. It must be yours. Someone knows, someone doesn't know ... The gray rat came running and stopped one step away from the bed. "You seem to be in a lot of pain, too," said Aunt Tamara. "Are you burnt to the ground or have you not seen the light from your children?" But when your kids are little, it doesn't hurt, now is the sweetest time. I think you're on the ground. He looked like a lazy idiot. Looks like he ran away! It's okay. You are happier than I am! I envy you, animal ... Aunt Tamara's brain got wet ... The days went by like this. At first, the rats acted in fear, but later they behaved very comfortably, wandering around the house as if they were in a warehouse inherited from their ancestors. Aunt Tamara continued to entertain them generously. By the way, Aunt Tamara got along with a black rat. The black rat, who had not been seen for three or four days, became the head of his family again, and at night he began to walk. Seeing this, my aunt was relieved. "I was worried you'd suddenly disappear." I'm glad you're alive anyway. Why didn't you show up? Didn’t you fall into the trap, rubbing? She asked question after question. "You don't look like you're trapped." I think you're looking for a nicer place here, aren't you? When you couldn't find it, you came in again. That's the way it is. The water that flowed in front of you is worthless. In fact, I shouldn’t have forgiven you. But I have forgiven you. As long as you have children, go and gather your food. But know that where there is blessing and generosity, there is punishment. Everything will not stop until it finds its place. Look, I didn’t live badly anyway. I lived happier than Dilora. But ... Aunt Tamara talked to the black rat in the same way she talked to the gray rat. However, the "owner of the family" seemed to be very greedy and greedy, he forgot to look to the side because he was too busy to feed his stomach, to throw away a large piece of food, and did not pay attention to the words of the lady. Aunt Tamara continues to speak: "But I know how much I'm suffering in the end." Being alone with you for almost twenty-four hours a day ... Waiting for the phone to ring ... Staring at the door ... People must think that this house is not a human, but a living statue. Well, that's it. No more regrets. I don't cry in the end like my grateful husband. There is no end to the world. Whether you are happy or unhappy with life, you will eventually leave this world for nothing. All living and non-living are mixed with the soil when the opportunity arises. When I die, those flowers wither. The vases are also crumbling for some reason. As a result, nothing is left in this room. It's going to be sunny. Not even you will stay. You're in trouble. But before that, you're going to bury my corpse. You see, I know everything, I have not forgotten or overlooked anything. Yes, it's true, I wasn't wrong ...
Before long, the gray rat suddenly disappeared. In the days that followed, Aunt Tamara kept counting the days until she had a stomach ache, her gait was heavy, and she was limping. When that happens ... On one of those wonderful evenings, the house was so crowded that Aunt Tamara was amazed at first, and then applauded like a child with joy: a world of black rats was running from foot to foot. Aunt Tamara's heart pounded as she saw her old acquaintance when she appeared in front of a gray rat with tears in her eyes and silent black eyes. "Yes, beast, did you get away with it?" Auntie immediately went to ask the rat how he was. "Didn't you have a hard time?" Anyway, this isn't your first time. You look like a beep. You look good, even if you're a little thin. But ... do you have so many kids? How do you feed them? Is it possible to raise so many children? I'm scared, look at you walking around! Indeed, the gray rat was much fuller than before, and although his movements seemed sluggish, his gaze was calm and quiet. "Even though you are small, you have a big heart," said Aunt Tamara. "I like you, so I want to help you." I will go to the market in the morning and buy grain for you. The leftovers and the crumbs of bread don't seem to bother you anymore ... In fact, Aunt Tamara went to the market that day and sprinkled some of the grain she had brought on the floor of her house. The aunt did it with some pleasure and passion. In the evening, when he saw rats and rats quarreling and screaming at each other, he would get up and sit down. - Hey you! Hey you! Damn it! Cried the old woman to the black rat. "Why don't you bite it all yourself and hang it on your kids!" You are a stoner but ... Indeed, the black rat was more greedy and at the same time more aggressive than the female. He seemed to be thinking only of himself. The grain took up more space and did not let anyone near it. The gray rat would be content with the remains of its young and its male. The female was more restrained than the black rat. After cleaning everything, the black rat and its young disappeared in the blink of an eye, but the gray rat was in no hurry to leave. It was as if he were saying goodbye to his housewife, and after standing alone for a minute or two in front of his aunt, he would "lip" and disappear. Suddenly, the rats became so numerous that Aunt Tamara was stunned. No, they were not black and gray rats. They were complete strangers. Their alienation can be seen in the fact that they were cruel to the family of gray rats. The uninvited new invaders were not only awkward but also extremely irritating. Aunt Tamara called them "Bezbet Daydylar". Aunt Tamara did not hesitate to buy grain, despite the fact that she was terrified. Now she buys more grain than before. In fact, he did it for the sake of the gray rat family. If the grain is small, it will not grow from those predators. There was a way to get rid of the bad guys. Let's just say I've been sprayed with cereal! But what about the gray rat? "It's cured, you don't eat!" He can't say! Eh! .. One day, she had a bad cold. He went to the market for grain in the bitter cold of winter. At the bus stop, he blew himself up. It's okay to take medicine for two or three days and stay warm in a warm house.
Aunt Tamara brought a thermos filled with boiling water and the necessary medicines to the bedside table. He left the window ajar to allow fresh air to enter. The aunt had already taken the hadith of not trying too hard during her illness. With a little fresh air, medicine, and boiling water, it won't be difficult even if the condition worsens. Eh, what about rats? What will happen to them if Aunt Tamara can't get up? The poor are left unattended. “Why am I so scared? What is wrong with me? Aunt Tamara thought as she tried to chase away the dark thoughts that were invading her. "Am I a sick person?" God willing, I'll be gone in three or four days. I was impressed by what she said and how I went on a strict diet for three days. "Don't worry if you feel unwell, it's a sign that the diet is starting to work," he said. Although I was in a bit of a hurry because of the cold and dietary inconvenience. It's okay, it's over! ” It's been three days. For some reason, Aunt Tamara still felt unwell. By the end of the week, my aunt was completely overweight and could not even get up. The fever made her faint from time to time. One evening, who knows, maybe in the middle of the day she didn't know her husband, to be exact, she couldn't tell the difference, it was as if she was standing next to a ghost. Look ... Brother Ulfat wrapped in a white cloth! "Come on, come with me now!" Aunt Tamara clearly heard the call. When he heard this, he immediately cried out in terror: - No! No! Keting! Don't come near me! I still have to live! I have to live long, long! I have to live! .. Aunt Tamara drove her husband away in a panic. But he didn't thank her, he just looked at his wife sadly ... "It's a dream ... my husband has a dream ..." The confused mother began to try to convince herself, who was already used to speaking out loud. Aunt Tamara, who had been paralyzed for a week, was sure that she would recover quickly, even though her body was drying up from the heat and pain. "I'll bring grain to my rats when I'm well." The poor thing must have suffered without me ...
Although she was not tired, she tried to lift her head, but she was so tired that she threw herself on the pillow and fainted. By the way, not only Aunt Tamara's "own" rats, but also the gang of bastards who invaded later, really suffered. Having eaten all the chewy things in the house, the gangs of "bad guys" were now running from corner to corner looking for food, and when they had no choice, the strong were gathering the weak. Gradually, the gang of "bad guys" went too far. After they had eaten a few starving children of the gray rat ... they attacked the housewife ... The black rat and his surviving children were among the Irkit grandfathers. Only for some reason there was no gray rat in the crowd ... Aunt Tamara, whose legs were already on her knees and whose face was fading with signs of life, did not even notice at first that her beloved rats were beginning to caress her body. He groaned in agony only when the sharp teeth of the beasts sank into the parts of his body where the work of life had not yet left him, and he could not bear to scream ... Let alone scream, he could not move. It was only from time to time, when her fading consciousness flashed for a few moments, that Aunt Tamara said, "Am I dying ... Have I lived so many years to feed rats? And slowly raised his head, gathering all the remaining forces in the middle of his body. "At last I saw my loneliness," he whispered, looking at the rats that were attacking him. "The loneliness that has surrounded me all my life has finally shown itself.""Fate made a joke of me on the eve of my life." I'm fed up with loneliness ... One dark night, my aunt died. A thief broke into the house last night. He was following an old woman who had been living alone for a long time. The thief entered the house through an open window at night and loaded everything he could find, from a spoon to his aunt's bed. The neighbors didn't even notice. But the thief did something before he left. When the rats saw the corpse lying on the bed, they threw marijuana into the room. Soon the rats began to die one by one. Then the flowers withered. As Aunt Tamara said, nothing was left. It's all gone, gone. All that was left was the wind that blew in through the open window and blew into the room like the spirit of a goddess ...


RASHK
OvulningengsuluvqiziXosiyatqo‘shniqishloqlikDonaboycholningto‘ng‘ichiSHeraligaturmushgachiqqanidao‘nettiyasharnavniholqizchaedi. Kelinlikliboslariuningbirhusnigao‘nhusnqo‘shibyubordi... Ahvolshudarajagaboribetdiki, hamqishloqlaryangikelinchakniko‘rishuchunkelaveribDonaboycholningbezorinichiqaribyuborishdi. Buningustigakuyovto‘raadabiyoto‘qituvchisiemasmi, ota-onasiniyuz-xotirqilibo‘tirmasdanxotiniatrofidaparvonabo‘lar, shirinso‘zlariniayamas, ilojinitopsa, uningqo‘linisovuqsuvgaurdirmasamderdi. Bukiliqayniqsaonagayoqmas, g‘ashikelar, ba’zan-ba’zanjudaensasiqotibketganmahallaricholigaqarab: “SHubolamiztozaginachuchchichiqdi-yov”, debqo‘yardi.
Ammo...
Ketma-kettug‘ilganuchbolaXosiyatnio‘zgartiribyubordi. Xosiyatkelinozibketdi, yonoqsuyaklariturtibchiqdi, yuzigaajintushdi, negadirchakkasochlariertaoqaraboshladi. Avvalginazokatlaridan-ku, asarhamqolmagandek. O‘ziyamerta-kechtinmaydi-da. Boshkelinemasmi, ro‘zg‘orningbutunog‘irligiuningelkasida. Qaynilarihaliyosh, qayinsingillaresaergategibketishgan. Ertalabkisoatto‘rtdanyumushboshlanardi: sigirsog‘ish, hovlisupurish, nonyopish, uytozalash, tushlikovqat, kechkiovqat, mollarningtaginitozalash, tezaginiyig‘ibtappiqilish... Xosiyatkelino‘zigaengilroqbo‘lsin,deyaavvaligafaqatsigirlarningtezaginitappiqilaredi. Birkunqaynonasitahoratolishgao‘tayotib, qo‘ylarningqiyiqo‘shibqilinsa, tappiyaxshichiqishinipisandaqilibqoldi...
Donaboycholningqoramoliko‘pedi. Ko‘z-quloqbo‘libturadidebog‘ilxonaningorqatarafigakattaqopag‘onbiritnibog‘labqo‘ygandi. YangikelinlikdavridaitXosiyatkelinniko‘rdidegunchaipiniuzgudayvovullardi. Keyinchalikyuvindi-chayindiberibo‘zigao‘rgatiboldi.
Kattaro‘zg‘orningtashvishihamkattabo‘larkan. Xosiyatkelinbirpascho‘zilibdamolishgazoredi.
Birkunieridabdurustdanunga:
— Xosi, salo‘zinggaqarabyursangbo‘lmaydimi? — dedi.
— Endimenikelinqilisharmidi? — dediXosiyatkelinbeparvoohangda.
Sheraliungag‘alati-g‘alatiqarabqo‘ydi.
YanabirkuniSheraliunga:
— Tuzukroqko‘ylagingyo‘qmi? Egningdaginingrang-ro‘yiqolmabdi-ku, — dedi.
Busafarovozibalandroq, jerkibroqchiqdi.
Xosiyatkelinbirzumkulimsirabturdi-daso‘ng:
— Atlasko‘ylakkiyib, moltaginitozalaymanmi? — dedi.
Erimiqetolmayqoldi. Ko‘zlariniolibqochdi. Xosiyatkelino‘zicha: “Bopladim, — debo‘yladi. — Ikkinchimengabuhaqdagapirmaydiganbo‘ldi”.
Biroqko‘po‘tmayyanashuhaqdagapochildi.
O‘shakunieriningbirozkayfiboredi. “Qo‘lingdantappininghidikelayapti, bor, yaxshilabyuvibke”, — debkechasixotininihovligachiqaribyubordi. Xosiyatkelinkirsovunbilanuch-to‘rtmartayuvsahamqo‘lidanhidketaydemasdi. Oxirichorbog‘dano‘tadiganariqbo‘yigaborib, qo‘llarigaloychapladi. Anchavaqtshuko‘yio‘tirdi. So‘ngyuvibtashlab, ortigaqaytarkan, xo‘rligikelibko‘zlarigayoshto‘ldi. Kelinbo‘libtushganidanberibirinchimartayig‘lashiedi. Olmadaraxtigasuyanibo‘ksib-o‘ksib, uzoqyig‘ladi. O‘zinibosib, yuziniariqdaoqayotganloyqasuvgachayib, uygakirganidaeriallaqachonuxlabqolgandi.
Ertasigaertalabu: “Uyoq-buyoqqachiqqandakiyarman” debsandiqqasolibqo‘yganohorliko‘ylaklaridanbirinikiyib, pardoz-andozinio‘rinlatibhovligachiqdi. Bostirmatarafdantahoratolibqaytayotganqaynotasihayronbo‘libkelinigaqarabqo‘ydi. Xosiyatkelinbunisezdivao‘ng‘aysizlanganidanyuguriboshxonagakiribketdi.
Donaboycholuygakirib, kampirgashipshidi:
— Turibxabarol, keliningqayoqqadirotlanyapti-yov?
To‘ladankelganRisolatkampirlorsillabhovligachiqdi. Oshxonaningochiqderazasidankelinningxamirqorayotganiniko‘rib, sekinortigaqaytdi.
— Orqasidanpoylabyuramanmi, o‘ziaytar-dakerakbo‘lsa, — deyao‘zichag‘udrandi.
Xamirqo‘liniyuvishuchunchiqqanidahovlidao‘ynabyurganqayniukalariyuguribkelishdi.
— Yanga, qaergaborasiz? Bozorgaborsizmi? — deyachuvillashdi.
Xosiyatkelinjudanoqulayahvoldaqoldi. O‘zinimehmondayurgandayhisqildi. Hechbirishigauquvikelmasdi. Shukuniyopgannonitaginibermay, parcha-parchabo‘libchiqdi. Tushlikdashilpildoqsuzamandeb, qaynonasiningxitoychinnisidanyasalganlaganinisindiribqo‘ydi. LaganRisolatkampirningkelinligidanqolganesdalikedi. Rosajig‘i-biyronichiqdi.
— Sen, — dediukelinigaqo‘linibigizqilib, — qosh-ko‘zingnibo‘yagunchaishinggapuxtabo‘l!
Xosiyatkelinningyuzidanolovchiqibketdi. “Lip” etibuyigakirdi-yu, kiyimlariniechib, haryoqqaotaboshladi.
Birnechakuno‘tgach, Xosiyatkelinkichkinaqiziniemizibo‘tirganchoqdaeridabdurustdanshundaydedi:
— Xosi, anavimuzqaymoqchixotinbor-ku, magazinningyonidando‘konchaochibolgan, o‘shajuvongaqarabturib, hayronqolaman-da. Tongsahardanshahardanetibkeladi. Kunbo‘yiqo‘li-qo‘ligategmaysavdoqiladi. Qoshqoraygandayanashahargajo‘naydi. Uyoqdayamuyishibo‘lsakerak. Shundayamhecho‘zinioldirmagan. Ja-aoliftabo‘libyuradi. Qanaqqibulgurarkin-ao‘zigaqarashga?..
Xosiyatkelinjavobbermadi. Labinitishlab, bo‘g‘zigatiqilgano‘kiriknibazo‘rqaytardi. Sheralixotininingholatinisezmadi. Uallaqandayyoqimlikayfiyatog‘ushidamastedi.
Kunlaro‘tgansayinXosiyatkelineridantortinadiganbo‘libqoldi. Sheraliuydavaqtiyonidao‘tirgisikelmas, ro‘zg‘oryumushlaribilano‘zinichalg‘itib,hovlidaivirsibyurardi. Ayolninghechkimgaaytmaganbirdan-birorzusiboredi. Upa-elikni, atirlartaqinchoqlarnierisovg‘aqilishinijuda-judaxohlardi. Atirlarishuqadarko‘pbo‘lishiniistardiki, hechqachonadobo‘lmasa. O‘zidantappiemas, atirgulhidianqibtursa...“Yonimdano‘tgankishiningmastlikdanboshlariaylanibketsa”, deyaorzuqilardi.
Ayolkishimingqilgandayam, tejamkorbo‘ladi.Shuarzimaganatirgahamfalonso‘mto‘laymanmi, debko‘ziqiymasligiturgangap. Ro‘zg‘oridabironkamchiliksezilsa, darholo‘ziganisbatansaxiylikqilibyuborganidanpushaymonbo‘ladi. Erkaklarningyo‘rig‘Iboshqa, ularsharttako‘zniyumadi-yu, oladi-qo‘yadi. Keyinhechqachonpushaymonhambo‘lishmasakerak. Tag‘inamkimbiladi? Eriundango‘zalliktalabqiladi-yu, biroq... Qo‘ng‘izdahamko‘ngilborligiesigayamkelmaydi.
Xosiyatkelino‘zinitortgansarierihamundanuzoqlashibborardi. Maktabdadarsitugagandankeyinhamallaqayoqlardasang‘ibyurar, uygakechqaytar, ba’zanovqatlangisihamkelmay, uxlabqolardi.
KunlarningbiridaSheraliuygahovliqibkeldi:
— Bo‘ldi, Xosi, o‘qituvchiliknitashlayman, — dediu. — Shunchayilishlab, birim-ikkibo‘lmadi. Savdobilanshug‘ullanaman.
— O‘qituvchilikyaxshiemasmi, tinchgina...
— E, g‘irtboshog‘riqdesang-chi. Kechgatuzukroqovqatqilibqo‘y. Mehmonlarkelishadi. Er-xotin. Bog‘dagiolmalargaxaridortopdim.
— Ie, nimadeyapsiz, — hushiboshidanuchdikelinning. — Otamruxsatbermaydi.
— Otambilano‘zimgaplashaman. Senaytganimniqilavergin.
Kechkipaytko‘chaeshikoldigayap-yangi “jiguli” kelibto‘xtadi. Undaner-xotinemas, uchkishi, ikkiayol, birerkaktushishdi. Xosiyatkelinmehmonlarningbiri “muzqaymoqchixotin”ekanliginidarholangladi. Ammonoxusho‘ylargabormadi. Elib-yuguribxizmatqildi. Sheralinegadirbezovtaedi. Mehmonlaroldidao‘tirolmay, haliuni, halibunibahonaqilib, turibketardi. Mehmondorchilikdanso‘ngmehmonlarchorboqqao‘tishdi. Sheralihamulargaergashdi. Og‘ilxonayonidagibog‘loqlikitbegonakishilarniko‘ribhuraverib, quloqlariniqomatgakeltirdi.
Xosiyatkelinqozon-tovoqlarniyuvibolgach, sigirsog‘ishuchunog‘ilxonatarafgao‘tdi. Usigirlarningoldigakunduztayyorlabqo‘yganemlarniqo‘ydi-da, elininisiypalab, iydiraboshladi. Shupaytog‘ilxonaningto‘ridan, tuynukochilgantarafidanerkakkishiningzardaliovozieshitildi. Xosiyatkelinovozegasieriekanliginisezdi. “Savdosikelishmayapti-yov”, debqo‘ydio‘zicha. Birozdanso‘ngayolkishining: “Nimaqipti? Nimaqiptikelsam?!.” Deganieshitildi. Xosiyatkelinqiziqishiustunkelib, sog‘ishnibasqildi, chelaknisigirdanuzoqroqergaqo‘yib, tuynuktomonyurdi. Tashqaridanko‘ribqolmasliklariuchunengashib, devorgayaqino‘tirdi.
— Odamninoqulayahvolgasoldingiz, faqatikkalasiboradidegandingiz-ku, — derdiSheralio‘pkalab.
— Neganoqulaybo‘larkan, —ayolningquvnoqovozieshitildi. — Xotiningizqanaqaliginibilmoqchiedim, xolos.
— Niyatingizgaetdingizmi?
— Ha,lekinyoqmadi, juda-a...to‘poriekan. Erinibegonaayollarso‘rabkelganiniko‘rib, rashkhamqilmadi-ya...
— Siznimehmondebo‘ylayapti-da. YUring, anavilarningyonigaboraylik-chi.
— Sizqo‘rqmang, ularaytgannarxingizgaolishadi. Faqat... essiz, shundayyigitxotingayolchimaganekansiz. Erimmenitashlabketgandankeyin, rosauchyilikikkinchixotinini “shantaj” qilganman. “Muzqaymoq” do‘koniniochibberibqutildisho‘rlik.
Ayolninghiringlabkulganieshitildi.
Xosiyatkelinningoyoq-qo‘lidanjonketib, devorgasuyanibqoldi. Xayolida: “Anavimegajinerimniyo‘ldanuryapti”, — degano‘ychiraylanib, hechqo‘nimtopmasdi...
Kelinsutchelaginiko‘taribog‘ilxonadanchiqqanida, shomtushaboshlagandi. Mehmonlarhalichorbog‘daaylanibyurishar, qopag‘onitbattaravjigachiqan,akkilayverib, hammaningjonigatekkandi. Peshayvondagiso‘ridachorbog‘danko‘zuzmayo‘tirganRisolatkampirhamnimanidirsezgandaybo‘ldi. “Itakillamagandamehmonlarninggap-so‘zlarinieshitibolardim,” — debo‘ylabxunobbo‘libo‘tirardi. Kelininingso‘ljayiboshxonatomongao‘tayotganiniko‘rib, sekinimlabchaqirdi.
— Anaviovozingo‘chgurnisalko‘zdanpanaroqqaboylabqo‘y, — dedizorlanib.
— Xo‘p, — dediXosiyatkelineshitilar-eshitilmasovozda. Uninghushio‘zidaemasdi. Butunvujudinig‘ashlikqamrabolgandi. YUragidamuzqaymoqchiayolganisbatanhalio‘zihamto‘latushunibetmaganadovatpaydobo‘lgandi. “Umenierimgayomonlab, unitortibolmoqchi... Menito‘poridedi-ya? E, xudo, endinimaqilaman? Qandaykunlargaqoldim? Dardimnikimgaaytaman?” Xosiyatitningoldigaetgunchatitrab-qaqshabbordi. Qopag‘onituniko‘ribtinchlangandaybo‘ldi-yu, ammotortinishiniqo‘ymasdi. Ayolzanjirniechishuchunqoziqyonigao‘tirarkan, zimdanolmazortarafgaqarabqo‘ydi. Er-xotinmehmonlarhovlitomongaqaytishayotganedi. Eriesamuzqaymoqchixotingaolmalarniko‘rsatib, allanimalarnivaysar, biroqayolningikalako‘ziXosiyatkelindaedi. UqandaydirmazaxomuzqarabturgandektuyuldiXosiyatkelinga.Itnichorbog‘dantashqarigaolibchiqib, bog‘lamoqchiedi, o‘tayotibyanabirmarotabaqaradi, qalbidaalamvanafrattuyg‘usiqorishibketdi, ko‘zlaridaqasoso‘tialangaoldi. Va “bexos”danqo‘lidanzanjirtushibketdi. Hamonjazavagatushib, hurayotganit “oshiq-ma’shuq” tomonyuguribketdi.Birlahzao‘tar-o‘tmasayolkishiningjonholatdaqichqirganieshitildi.