Men respect women who communicate
in a succinct way, because it’s the language
men use to talk to one another.
The bitch communicates differently from the nice girl. A bitch tells
it like it is in a matter-of-fact way
and gets her point across
succinctly. The nice girl wears her heart on her sleeve and pours out
her guts. And what does he hear? Nothing at all. However, he does
see her neediness, which eventually turns him off.
The Dumb Fox Is More Mysterious
The dumb fox knows that familiarity breeds contempt, so she
doesn’t spill her guts on the first couple of dates.
She lets the
“cream rise to the top” without rushing things.
When you first meet a man, don’t overcompensate by doing all
the talking. Don’t talk constantly
out of nervousness.
Keeping cool
and quiet will give you more appeal, not to mention the ability to
wield more power.
I was once on a date with a man I had just met.
He began to
share all the sordid details of his last relationship. I had no desire to
listen, but I didn’t criticize him or make him feel “wrong.” I was
polite. I simply asked, “So John, what’s your workload like at the
office this week?”
The dumb fox does
not
ask, “May we change the subject?”
Permission isn’t necessary.
The dumb fox also doesn’t tell him about her past relationships.
You’re “a prize,” and you don’t have a long list of calamities to
report. He doesn’t need to know that your ex-husband stole your
appliances, is defaulting
on his child support, and has a Mafioso
brother who is doing time for racketeering. If he’s classy, he won’t
be impressed that your last boyfriend is “still stalking you and can’t
let go.”
If he asks about your ex, you say, “We went our separate ways.”
Here’s another option: “We wanted different things.” The dumb fox
relies on a “vague generality” when he asks for information that’s
none of his business.
As far as what
you
disclose? Don’t
volunteer bad information
about yourself. He doesn’t need to know that you’re insecure about
your thighs or that you haven’t been on a date in 7.2 months.
Inquiring minds do
not
need to know.
Men automatically assume that, if you’re interested, you’ll do
anything to “nail him down.” He
immediately thinks you want
“exclusivity”; you want to break open the hope chest and have
babies with him. It’s important for him to think you’re different: You
are relaxed, secure, and happy
with him
or
without him.
This is
known
as the happy-go-lucky formula, described in Attraction
Principle #42.
ATTRACTION PRINCIPLE #42
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