Title: 100 Ways to Motivate Yourself : Change Your Life Forever author

Afterword
101. Teach yourself the power of negative thinking
I discovered something remarkable quite by accident one night as I was

conducting a workshop on goal achievement. I discovered the power of
negative thinking. As the people in the workshop struggled to list their
goals on a piece of paper, I ran out of patience.
"How will you get what you want if you don't know what it is?" I asked
the room, half of which still had empty sheets of paper and empty facial
expressions.
"Okay," I said, "Let's put these goals away. I want to try something
different. Take out a new sheet of paper and do this. Write down what
you don't want in your life. List every major problem and source of
discomfort you have. All your worries. All the negative things you can
think of, even if they haven't come into reality yet. Even if they are just
things you don't want to happen in the future. Take your time and be
thorough."
What I saw happen next startled me. The entire room's energy level
picked up, and everyone in the workshop was writing and writing and
writing. It wasn't
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long before some people asked if they could use a second page.
Something strange and electric was filling the air as people aired their
fears and grievances. Pages were flooded with ink, and hands and
fingers had to be shaken out so people wouldn't cramp up from writing
so much. When I called an end to the exercise, the room was buzzing.
I had obviously let something loose that wasn't there before. At that
moment I got my first true look at the power of the negative. Actually, I
had seen it before. When I took the time to look back over my life, I
realized that saying no was always a stronger stand to take than saying
yes. Saying no is drawing a line in the sand. It is taking a stand. It is
putting your foot down. It is passionate. It is powerful. Compared to
saying no, saying yes is wobbly and wishy-washy. I said yes to a
thousand drinks of alcohol in my life. But it wasn't until one hung-over
suicidal morning when I said no that my life got completely turned
around. When the cave man drew the line in the dirt outside his cave
and said no to the saber-tooth tiger, his family was finally safe.
Saying no is powerful, because it comes from the deepest part of the
soul. There are some things we just won't tolerate.
Once we fully understand the power of those no's deep inside of us, we
can use them to motivate ourselves like never before.
In the workshop I was telling you about, once the people filled their
papers up with what they didn't want, we got busy converting problems
into goals. You don't want to go bankrupt? Then let's get a prosperity
plan going! You don't want to weigh as much as your two best friends

combined? Then let's get a nutrition and exercise program going! Any
no can be converted to a powerful yes.
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So if you're stuck without any truly motivating goals, dreams or
commitments, then go negative first. Figure out what you absolutely
don't want—what you absolutely fear and dread and refuse to let in to
your life—then convert it to its opposite, positive form and see what
happens. You'll be more motivated than you ever dreamed you could
be.
I have used this in one-on-one meetings with people who wouldn't open
up and tell me what they wanted. I simply asked them to tell me what
they didn't want to have happen and we were off to the races. Once you
know what that is, you can convert the conversation to exciting plans
and objectives. This explains why so many successful people had
difficult upbringings, sometimes living in the harshest poverty. They
connected very early to what they didn't want. The rest was clear
sailing.
The next time you lack passion when thinking of what you want, try
turning it around. Ask yourself what you absolutely don't want, and then
feel the energy building in you to overcome that problem.
That energy you're feeling is the deepest and most primal form of
motivation.
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Index
A
acting the part you want to be, 47–48
affirmations, 34–35
attitude, positive, having a, 90–91
audiobooks, 38–41
awareness, making most of, 75–76
B
Bennett, William, 72
biocomputer, 73–75, 118
Book of Virtues, The, 72
Brain Building, 29

brainstorming, 122–124
Branden, Devers, 19, 83
Burroughs, William, 15–16, 38, 41, 51, 62, 83–85, 118–119, 140–141,
155–156, 192, 201
buttons, pushing your positive, 33–34
C
challenge,
as motivator, 57–58
facing, 25–27
change, as motivator, 155–157
changing yourself, 169–170
chemicals, body, 50–51
choices and motivation, 15–16
Choosing Your Own Greatness, 40
Chopra, Deepak, 164, 185
comfort zones, 57–58
competition, 147–149
confidence, 82–85
creating a vision, 22–24
Creating Affluence, 164
creative thinking, 111–113
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creativity, 93–96
Csikszentmihalyi, Mihaly, 106–107, 182–183
curiosity, power of, 76–78
D
deathbed exercise, 19–21
discipline, 73
dreaming, power of, 61
dreams, turning into reality, 160–161
Dyer, Wayne, 40, 41, 88
E
energy, 174–176
F
fate, mastering your own, 200
fear, 55, 62–64, 84
fearlessness, social, 53
Fifth Discipline, The, 197
Fisher, Bobby, 131–133
five percent solution, 155–157
Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience, 106–107

focus, maintaining, 24–25
Follow the Yellow Brick Road, 78
Ford, Henry, 44, 146
four-circle exercise, 143–147
Frankenstein's Castle, 38, 91
freedom, consciously noticing our, 130–131
friends, positive, surrounding yourself with, 45–47
Fritz, Robert, 197–197
G
games, as challenges, 96–98
goals, 174–176
and happiness, 90
developing, 58–59
importance of setting, 106–108
inflating your, 193–195
power, setting specific, 168–169
progressing toward, 79–82
staying focused on, 24–25
writing down your, 108–111
Goss, Tracy, 38
H
habits,
changing your, 128–130
entrapping, 139
happiness, 70–71
Hardison, Steve, 133–136, 138–139
hero, finding a, 19–194
Hill, Napoleon, 37, 41, 165, 208
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honesty, 200–202
I
imagination, using your, 60–61
inner voice, 133–136, 140–141
interactive listening, 66–67
J
Johnson, Jimmy, 24–25
Jordan, Michael, 147
K
Kaufman, Barry Neil, 152
Keller, Helen, 150–152
Killebrew, Mike, 36–37

Knight, Bobby, 77
Knipe, Fred, 69, 162
knowledge as power base, 199–200
Koether, Bob, 29–30, 111–112
Kolbe, Him, 30–31
L
"ladder of selves," 188–189
Last Word in Power, The, 38
laughter, 203–205
Learned Optimism, 117, 140
left brain vs. right brain, 92–93
life, simplifying your, 27–31
listening,
interactive, 66–67
reprogramming your, 73–75
lists, making, 165–168
Lombardi, Vince, 27
luck, 143
M
Master Key to Riches, The, 37, 208
McGinnis, Alan Loy, 79, 115
mind and body connection, 184–186
money, power over motivation, 164–165
motivation, 48–51, 112
easing into, 44–45
mystery novels, reading, 186–188
N
Naked Lunch, 51
negative thinking, power of, 213–215
negativity, tuning out, 73–75
news fasts, 176–177
O
optimism, 80
building, 42–44
vs. pessimism, 15
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P
Path of Least Resistance, The, 197
Patton, General George, 62, 132–133
Peale, Norman Vincent, 78, 117–118
Peck, M. Scott, 137, 150

personality, 15–17, 47, 207
pessimism, 80, 119–122, 150
pessimistic thoughts,
debating, 117–119
pessimists, 116–117
planning, importance of, 170–172
pleasure vs. enjoyment, 182–184
Power of Optimism, The, 79, 115
problem, becoming the, 191–193
problems, as learning tools, 101–103
problem-solving, 162–163
vs. creating, 197–198
promise, making unreasonable, 141–142
purpose, 175–176
finding your, 85–90
R
reaction vs. action, 91–93
rejection, as motivator, 172–174
RelationSHIFT, 110
relation-shift, creating a, 78–79
relationships, 64–66
asking questions in your, 78
relaxation, active vs. passive, 98–99
risks, taking, 52–53
Road Less Traveled, The, 137
Robbins, Anthony, 41
S
Schwarzenegger, Arnold, 21–22
self-confidence, 61
self-discipline, 36–38
self-esteem, 83–84
self-image, 152–153, 205–207
self-motivation rituals, 68–70
self-motivation, 31–32, 49–51, 57–58, 78–79, 103–106, 182–184, 198,
211
lack of, 157–158
Seligman, Martin, 117, 140, 150
silence, listening to, 48–50
simplifying your life, 27–31
Six Pillars of Self-Esteem, The, 38, 83, 140, 192, 201
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Son Rise, 152
Spontaneous Healing, 46, 102–103, 210
Stewart, John, 69
T
television, turning off the, 56–57
They Call Me Coach, 143
thought,
connection to motivation, 113–117
power of, 181–182
Tolle, Eckhart, 38
transformation, personal, 99–101
truth, 200–202
U
unexpected, welcoming the, 35–36
unhappiness, as motivator,
V
vision, 197–199
creating a, 22–23
visioneering, 159–161
voice, inner, 140–141
listening to your, 133–136
Vos Savant, Marilyn, 29, 187
vulnerability, using your, 54–56
W
Walsh, Bill, 58–59
weakness, turning into strength, 189–191
Weil, Andrew, 46, 102–103, 176, 210
whole-brain thinking, 92–93
willpower, 71–73
developing, 67–68
Wilson, Collin, 38, 91, 139
Wooden, John, 100, 142–143,
Woods, Tiger, 133
work, planning, 41–42
worry, replacing with action, 178–181
Write from the Heart, 69
Wurman, Richard Saul, 78
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