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partly guessed the poor old thing had picked it up wrong, but all
the same I put a knot in my handkerchief to remind me to ask
where I was going.
And I may as well admit straight out, that I wasn't having any-
thing to do with any lepers. I hadn't thought of backing out of the
thing entirely at that time, but I was backing out of it if it was to
be lepers!
The thought of the lepers gave me the creeps, I suppose. Did you
ever get the feeling when a thing was mentioned that you
had
it?
Well, that was the way I felt. I kept going over to the basin behind
the screen (Mrs McBride's) and washing my hands every minute,
and as for spitting out, my throat was raw by the time I heard the
cab at the door.
My Vocation
439
'Here they come,' cried my father, raising his hand like the starter
at the dog track.
'Out of this, all of you,' cried Mrs Mullins, rushing out and giv-
ing an example to everyone.
'Holy God!' said my mother, but I don't think that was meant to
be a prayer either.
But she had nothing to be uneasy about: the room was gorgeous.
That was another thing: I thought they'd be delighted with the
room. We never did it up any way special for the Visiting Sisters,
but they were always saying how nice we kept it: maybe that was
only to encourage my mother, but all the same it was very nice of
them. But when the two Recruiting Officers arrived (it was my
father called them that after they went), they didn't seem to notice
the room at all in spite of what we'd done to it.
And do you know what I heard one of them say to the other?
it seems clean, anyway,' she said.
Now I didn't like that 'seems'. And what did she mean by the
'anyway' I'd like to know?
It sort of put me off from the start - would you believe that?
That, and the look of them. They weren't a bit like the Visiting
Sisters — or even the Begging Sisters; who all had lovely figures —
like statues. One of them was thin all right, but I didn't like the
look of her all the same. She didn't look thin in an ordinary way;
she looked worn away, if you know what I mean? And the other
one was fat. She was so fat I was afraid if she fell on the stairs she'd
start to roll like a ball.
She was the boss: the fat one.
And do you know one of the first things she asked me? You'd
never guess. I don't even like to mention it. She caught a hold of
my hair.
i hope you keep it nice and clean,' she said.
What do you think of that? I was glad my mother didn't hear
her. My mother forgets herself entirely if she's mad about anything.
She didn't hear it, though. But I began to think to myself that they
must have met some very low-class girls if they had to ask
that
question. And wasn't that what you'd think?
Then the worn-looking one said a queer thing, not to me, but to
the other nun.
'She seems strong, anyway,' she said. And there again I don't
440 Mary Lavin
think she meant my health. I couldn't help putting her remark
alongside the way she was so worn-looking, and I began to think
I'd got myself into a nice pickle.
But I was prepared to go through with it all the same. That's me:
I have great determination although you mightn't believe it. Sis
often says I'd have been well able for the savages if I'd gone on
with the thing.
But I didn't.
I missed it by a hair's breadth, though. I won't tell you all the
interview, but at the end of it anyway they gave me the name of the
Convent where I was to go for Probation, and they told me the day
to go, and they gave me a list of clothes I was to get.
'Will you be able to pay for them?' they said, turning to my
father. They hadn't taken much notice of him up to that.
I couldn't help admiring the way he answered.
'Well, I managed to pay for plenty of style for her up to now,' he
said, 'and seeing that this mourning outfit is to be the last I'll be
asked to pay for, I think I'll manage it all right. Why?'
I admired the 'why?'
'Oh, we have to be ready for all eventualities,' said the fat one.
Sis and I nearly died laughing afterwards thinking of those
words. But I hardly noticed them at the time, because I was on my
way out the door to order a cab. They had asked me to get one and
they had given me so many instructions that I was nearly daft.
They didn't want a flightly horse, and they didn't want a cab that
was too high up off the ground, and I was to pick a cabby that
looked respectable.
Now at this time, although there were still cabs to be hired, you
didn't have an almighty great choice, and I knew I had my work
cut out for me to meet all their requirements.
But I seemed to be dead in luck in more ways than one, because
when I went to the cab stand there, among the shiny black cabs,
with big black horses that rolled their eyes at me, there was one old
cab and it was all battered and green-mouldy. The cabby too
looked about as mouldy as the cab. And as for the horse - well,
wouldn't anyone think that he'd be mouldy too. But as a matter of
fact the horse wasn't mouldy in any way. Indeed, it was due to the
way he bucketed it about that the old cab was so racked-looking:
it was newer than the others I believe, and as for the cabby, I believe
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