The Molecule of More

look down peripersonal space; from the future, distant realm of dopa-
mine, and into the consummatory, near-body realm of H&N. Buyer’s 
remorse is the failure of the H&N experience to compensate for the 
loss of dopaminergic arousal. If we made a wise purchase, it’s possible 
that strong H&N gratification will make up for the loss of the dopamine 
thrill. Alternatively, another way to avoid buyer’s remorse is to purchase 
something that triggers more dopaminergic expectation, for example, 
a tool, like a new computer that will boost productivity, or a new jacket 
that will make you look amazing the next time you go out. 

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35
DRUGS
Thus we see three possible solutions to buyer’s remorse: (1) chase 
the dopamine high by buying more, (2) avoid the dopamine crash by 
buying less, or (3) strengthen the ability to transition from dopamine 
desire to H&N liking. In no case, though, is there any guarantee that the 
things we so desperately want will be things that we will enjoy having. 
Wanting and liking are produced by two different systems in the brain, 
so we often don’t like the things we want. That’s just what’s going on in 
a scene from the sitcom The Office in which Will Ferrell, as temporary 
boss Deangelo Vickers, cuts into a large cake:
Deangelo:
I, for one, love the corners.
He slices off a corner, and eats it with his hand.
Deangelo:
Why did I just do that? It’s not even that good. I 
don’t even want it. I had cake for lunch.
He throws what’s left in his hand into the trash.
Deangelo 
(sinking his fingers into the cake, and grabbing 
another handful)
:
No. You know what? I’ve been good. I 
deserve this.
He pauses, then:
Deangelo:
What am I doing? C’mon, Deangelo!
He throws that handful away, too, then turns back to the cake. He leans 
down to the cake so he can yell at it.
DeAngelo:
No! No!
Distinguishing between what we want and what we like can be diffi-
cult, but the disconnect is most dramatic when people become addicted 
to drugs.
HIJACKING THE DESIRE CIRCUIT
Since he spent so much time prowling for women, Andrew spent most of his 
free time in bars. When he was in college, he would go to keg parties where 
he drank until the early morning hours, so walking around with a beer in 
his hand felt natural. After graduation most of his drinking buddies moved 

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36
THE MOLECULE OF MORE
on to other things. Alcohol no longer played a central role in their lives. But 
Andrew, for whom a bar was like home, kept at it. When he found someone 
he was interested in, he drank faster. Under the influence of a bright pair of
eyes the world became a more exciting place, fueling his enjoyment of alcohol.
He knew that his drinking had become a problem when his morning 
hangovers made it hard for him to give his best at work. His sales began to 
slip, and his therapist advised him to take a break from drinking. The ther-
apist recommended that Andrew try it for thirty days so he could experience 
what it was like to be sober. The therapist knew that if a heavy drinker can 
do this, he usually feels better—clearheaded, full of energy, better able to 
enjoy the simple pleasures in life—and that this feeling increases motivation 
for long-term sobriety. On the other hand, if a drinker can’t achieve thirty 
days of sobriety, it’s an indication that he no longer has full control of