Could I be in love with her? No, impossible
, Tengo told himself.
It just so happens
that something inside her has physically shaken my heart. So, then, why am I so
concerned about the pajamas she had on her body? Why did I (almost unconsciously)
pick them up and smell them?
There were too many questions. It was probably Chekhov who said that the
novelist is not someone who answers questions but someone who asks them. It was a
memorable phrase, but Chekhov applied this attitude not only to his works but to his
life as well. His life presented many questions but answered none. Although he knew
quite well that he was suffering from an incurable lung disease (as a doctor, he could
not help but know), he tried hard to ignore the fact, and refused to believe he was
dying until he was actually on his deathbed. He died young, violently coughing up
blood.
Tengo left the kitchen table, shaking his head.
My girlfriend is coming today. I
have to do laundry and clean the place up now. Thinking is something I can save for
later
.
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