Manipulation Dark Psychology to Manipulate and Control People

Basic Ideas
In a broad sense, manipulation is the effort to affect the behavior or
perception of others. Most definitions extend that to include “via the use of
abusive, deceptive or otherwise exploitative means” or something similar,
as a means of differentiating between manipulation and other influencing
behaviors, such as persuasion.
That raises even more questions, such as what constitutes “exploitative”.
Deception is relatively easy to define as a willful concealment or alteration
of the truth. But does deception really preclude persuasion?
At a job interview, you probably won’t mention the times you came in late
to work at your previous job due to hangovers; is that manipulation? You
could argue that anyone hiring for a job is already operating on the
understanding that people are likely to highlight their positive traits, and
draw attention away from the negatives. In that sense, it isn’t necessarily
dishonest to omit certain information in that situation. So expectation can
also play a part in determining the ethics of manipulation and where the line
is drawn between manipulation and other forms of influence.
Putting ethics aside for now, there is another word, in that broad definition,
worthy of attention. Defining manipulation as an “effort” suggests that
manipulation is still manipulation regardless of success or failure – the act
of manipulation is defined as the attempt. Ironically, those least successful
at manipulating others, who are most frequently discovered, are more likely
to gain a reputation as manipulative than those who succeed.
You can probably point to someone in your orbit, a relative or co-worker
perhaps, who you consider to be manipulative. Yet, consider how others
view them. Are they well known as a manipulator? Does this impact their
success? The answer to this, too, may be complicated. If someone is
considered by their peers at work to be manipulative and yet holds sway
over the boss, they might still be judged successful. When thinking about
manipulating others, it’s important to define clear goals. This will allow you
to make rational, objective decisions, which is key to success.

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At this point, there are too many questions and too few answers. The
remainder of this chapter will tie up some loose ends, and establish a
definition that will give bearing for the rest of the book.

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