How to Write Great Essays

VAGUE AND SPECIFIC SENTENCES
Here are some sentences that lack accuracy, followed by better versions that use pin-
pointing:
Vague:
Janus needs to file his application soon.
Specific:
Janus needs to file his application by January 4.
Vague: 
Space exploration has helped human beings in many ways.
Specific: 
The many benefits of space travel include the invention of fire detectors,
calculators, Kevlar, and CATscan and MRI technologies.
Vague:
Investing money in the stock market can be risky.
Specific:
Over the last year, a $1,000 investment in a large-cap stock fund became
worth $820. That same investment placed in a savings account totaled $1,065.
Vague:
The new teacher is good.
Specific:
The new teacher won “Teacher of the Year” awards six times at her previ-
ous school and has received federal grants for three student-led projects.
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Clarity
CHAPTER 2 
HOW TO WRITE GREAT ESSAYS
15
B
E
C
O N C I S E
You won’t score points with your readers by using five sentences that express an idea that
could have been stated in one. Wordiness is boring, and it takes up valuable time and space.
You have just 25 minutes to write the SAT essay, and most application essays are limited to
500 words, or two pages. That means you don’t have the time or space to waste words. There
are two equally important approaches to more concise writing: eliminating unnecessary words
and phrases, and using the active (as opposed to passive) voice whenever possible. (For more
information on the topic of active versus passive voice, including other reasons why you
should avoid it, read through Chapter 4.)
Many of the words and phrases listed below are both well-known and, unfortunately,
well-used. They don’t convey meaning, and are therefore unnecessary. The following are
three of the worst offenders, with usage examples.
1.
Because of the fact that
. In most cases, just 
because
will do.
Because of the fact that he was late, he missed his flight.
Because he was late, he missed his flight.
2.
That
and 
which
phrases. Eliminate them by turning the idea in the 
that
or 
which
phrase into an adjective.
These were directions that were well-written.
These directions were well-written.
3.
That
by itself is a word that often clutters sentences unnecessarily, as in the fol-
lowing examples:
The newscaster said that there was a good chance that election turnout would
be low and that it could result in a defeat for our candidate.
The newscaster said there was a good chance election turnout would be low
and it could result in a defeat for our candidate.