How to Write Great Essays

8
8
Sample Essay Prompts and Essays
CHAPTER 8 
HOW TO WRITE GREAT ESSAYS

---

HOW TO WRITE GREAT ESSAYS
CHAPTER 8
Sample Essay Prompts and Essays
98
Regional Tournament and am on my way to Regional Camp to compete with
sixty other girls for positions on the East Coast Select Team, I feel tremen-
dously nervous and inferior. Yet when I call my parents that night and learn
that my grandmother is in the hospital, I realize that this week of competition
is going to be much more challenging emotionally than physically.
Wednesday. I haven’t been playing very well; I’m on the reserve team and
my chances for advancement are slim. There is only one person who can
improve my mood: my mother. Somehow she always knows just what to say.
That night I call to tell her about my day and let her cheer me up. Instead, she
tells me that my grandmother’s situation is worse. The news hits me like a
physical blow. My mind starts reeling with thoughts of my grandmother: the
way she would pour her coffee into water glasses if it wasn’t scalding hot, her
soft, all-encompassing bear hugs, her smiling voice over the phone. The thought
of this plump, joyful woman I love so much lying in a sterile hospital bed is
too painful to think about, so I lose myself in a fantasy novel.
Thursday morning. Now I’m really playing poorly; my mind is with my
grandmother, not my soccer ball. I look up across the field—and see my
mother walking slowly toward me. I know. She’s there to bring me to visit my
grandmother, maybe for the last time.
Thursday afternoon. The hospital visit is eerie. My grandmother looks as if
she is just barely alive, willing herself to take one more breath. I talk to her
about camp, about how good the other players are, and how my game hasn’t
been my best. She doesn’t reply, but I know she hears me. She loves that I
play soccer, always telling me how lucky I am to be on a team of girls, and
basking in my tales of games won and lost. My mother wants me to stay
home and visit the hospital again tomorrow. I’m not sure.
Friday, a little after 11:00 
A
.
M
. After much debate, I have decided to return
to the Regional Camp for the last game. I know my grandmother wants me to
finish what I have started. I also feel I have an obligation to myself to follow
through: I have worked so hard and so long to get to this point that I would
be letting myself down if I didn’t grasp my last opportunity to be selected. The
coaches put me on the advanced team, and I block out all thoughts of my
grandmother and play my heart out—for fifteen minutes. The game ends.
Regional Camp is over, and I haven’t made the team. This is the first time
someone has told me I’m not good enough at soccer and it hurts.
EVALUATION
The writer of this essay detailed her involvement with soccer in a number of places on her
college application, from a description of activities, to a recommendation from her coach,
to a list of awards. She knew her essay shouldn’t be simply another explanation of her suc-
cesses on the soccer field. Instead, she combined the experience of trying out for a regional