Business Etiquette This book teaches individuals how to represent their

faux pas
. If this doesn’t work, then take a moment the
next day to talk to your co-worker about it. Be sure to use
the “I” form instead of “you”: “I learned that the appropri-
ate utensil to use for the appetizer is the two-pronged fork
to the right of the spoon,” rather than “You used the wrong
fork the other night and looked like a fool.” By speaking in
the first person singular, you will come across as providing
constructive criticism, rather than being perceived as an
attacker.
Tip #92
Tip #92
Tip #92
Tip #92
Tip #92
Give overseas visitors the VIP tr
Give overseas visitors the VIP tr
Give overseas visitors the VIP tr
Give overseas visitors the VIP tr
Give overseas visitors the VIP treatment.
eatment.
eatment.
eatment.
eatment.
When entertaining contacts from overseas or across the
border, be sure to refer to them as “international” rather
than “foreign.” Frequently, the term “foreign” implies some-
thing undesirable, alien, out of place, or not belonging. When
you are hosting a specific group from a particular country,
you should, of course, incorporate it into your introduction
(“our Chinese customers” or “our Greek clients”).
It may seem like a small matter, especially when you
consider that many of your visitors will be too polite to cor-
rect you, yet using insensitive terminology may offend your
visitors and can cost you business.

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132
Business Etiquette
Tip #93
Tip #93
Tip #93
Tip #93
Tip #93
Know how to get a business meal of
Know how to get a business meal of
Know how to get a business meal of
Know how to get a business meal of
Know how to get a business meal off to
f to
f to
f to
f to
the right star
the right star
the right star
the right star
the right start.
t.
t.
t.
t.
You’re hosting a business meal…and you’ve got questions.
How do you let the server know that you are in charge?
Where do you seat the most senior guest? When should
business be discussed?
Seasoned hosts know that phrases like, “My guests and
I would like to know about your specials” or I’d like my
guests to order first” are sure cues to servers that the bill is
to be given to them at the end of the meal.
These pros also recognize that servers take orders from
the first person to the host’s right…and therefore make a
point of sitting to the immediate left of the most senior guest.
Finally, they know that a business meal is for eating
first…and 
then 
for discussing the matter at hand. For that
reason, business should either be discussed before the food
arrives or near the end of the meal. (Exception: If your se-
nior guest has a different way of running the business meal,
by all means follow his or her lead.)
Tip #94
Tip #94
Tip #94
Tip #94
Tip #94
Think twice befor
Think twice befor
Think twice befor
Think twice befor
Think twice before jettisoning a
e jettisoning a
e jettisoning a
e jettisoning a
e jettisoning a
conversational par
conversational par
conversational par
conversational par
conversational partner
tner
tner
tner
tner.....
Recently, I heard this from a participant at one of my
seminars:
“I was at a reception last night; I approached someone
standing alone and soon learned that I had absolutely noth-
ing in common with him. How do you escape from a situa-
tion like that?”

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133
Unfamiliar Settings
The next time you find yourself in that situation, change
your mindset. Recognize that everyone is interesting…if 
you
are sincerely interested. The secret is knowing how to get
the conversation “engine” revved up properly!
Ask open-ended questions (that is, questions that fo-
cus on “who,” “what,” “when,” “where,” and “how”) rather
than closed-ended ones (questions that can be answered
with the words “Yes” or “No”).
Look at the difference: