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How sad that the Muslims today have resorted to squandering
their wealth in such avenues which have neither worldly nor
hereafter benefits. If only people would divert all their attention
to wards following the Shariah in its pristine pure state. If all
the Muslims have to combine
this wasted wealth of
engagements parties, etc. and utilise it in constructive avenues,
how many Madaaris, Masaajid, hospitals, schools, etc. could
have been constructed?
Precautions after the engagement
One major evil that takes place after the engagement and before
the Nikah is that the prospective couple meet with each other,
speak over the telephone, go places, etc. They do not even
regard
this as being wrong, rather they condone their evil by
citing the excuse of it being a means of fostering closeness and
love. All such actions invite the Wrath and displeasure of
Allaah Ta`ala, and it also deprives the union of blessings and
Barkat. Muslim couples should abstain from such evils.
We will now cite for you some relevant rulings from Hadhrat
Moulana Yusuf Ludhianwi’s (rahmatullah alayh) Kitaab,
Aap
ke Masaail aur un ka Hal
, hoping that the evil of this sin settles
on the hearts and make all realise the evil of such actions.
Mas`alah 1:
Question:
One person says that it is not permissible for the
prospective groom to meet with the betrothed girl, speak to her
over the telephone or to go around with her. I told this person
that this is common in our locality and it is not regarded as evil.
This person could not explain to me properly his reason so as to
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give me satisfaction. Can you please
tell me if this correct or
not?
Answer:
Before the Nikah, the betrothed girl is just like any
other stranger to the prospective groom, so he cannot
communicate with her. Your statement of
“this is common in
our locality and it is not regarded as evil”
,
is unacceptable
because firstly, amongst the honourable societies this is
regarded as an evil. Another point is that customary actions are
no proofs in the Shariah. Any such custom which is against the
Shariah must be rectified. Can the mixing between the boys and
girls in our colleges and universities ever be condoned as being
permissible?
Question:
How should the relationship between the prospective
couple be before Nikah? That is, can they speak and mix with
each other, without committing any immoral act? What is the
Shar`i ruling regarding such mixing?
Answer:
It is permissible to look once at the girl one intends to
marry. Besides this one look, which the boy himself does or
gets some reliable family-female to do, no other ‘mixing’ is
allowed. They cannot intermingle nor speak to each other. This
very mixing which takes place before the Nikah is in itself,
immoral.
KUHTBAH – THE MESSAGE OF NIKAH
We will now cite from a Kitaab authored by Mufti Taqi
Uthmaani Saheb, entitled
Khutbah-The Message of Nikah
,
where we will dilate on the importance and significance of
Nikah.
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“There is probably not a single one of us who has never been
near or taken some part in a Nikah. Nikahs regularly take place
in various venues and thousands of people attend (collectively).
You may have noticed that before the actual Nikah, wherein the
Ijaab
and
Qubool
(proposal and acceptance) take place, a
Khutbah is recited. Thereafter the usual Nikah formalities take
place. Although the Khutbah is not an integral or obligatory
constituent of the Nikah or necessary for its being valid, and a
Nikah where there is only
Ijaab
and
Qubool
in the presence of
witnesses
will also be valid nonetheless, this Khutbah before
the Nikah is a Sunnat of Nabi (sallallahu alayhi wasallam).
Nabi (sallallahu alayhi wasallam) had taught Hadhrat Abdullah
Ibn Mas’ood (radhiallahu anhu) the opening verses of this
Khutbah. These are the very words which we always hear at
every Nikah ceremony. Generally, the words of the Khutbah,
its import and object are lost in the ceremony of Nikah. Rarely
does anyone pay any heed or attention to the Khutbah and
many a times, if the gathering
is large and there is no
loudspeaker, then the actual words are not even heard by many.
Most of the time, people engage in their own private
conversations whilst the Khutbah is being recited.
It is also short-sightedness on the part of many who spend
thousands, nay hundreds of thousands, on the Nikah
ceremonies, but they cannot spend a small amount of money to
arrange for a loudspeaker whereby the words of the Khutbah
and the
Ijaab
and
Qubool,
which
are the essence and crux of
the entire occasion, may be heard with ease by all the
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