101
removing this misconception. Indeed Ihsaan is necessary for
Salaat and all other forms of ibaadat, however, its application
is not only restricted there. It is to be applied to the other
aspects of your life also. When a man interacts with others in
any sphere of life, he should have this in mind that Allaah
Ta`ala is watching him. More especially this will apply in the
relationship between man and wife. When a man has this
perception vivid in his mind then he will deal more fairly with
all, especially his wife.”
Thereafter Doctor Saheb mentioned that it was amongst the
Sunnats of Nabi (sallallahu alayhi wasallam) that he never, in
his entire life, became naturally angry
with any of his blessed
wives or scolded them. Doctor Saheb said,
“In trying to
emulate this Sunnat, I have also inculcated this habit in myself
that I never vent my anger on my family members. In this
regard, I say with gratitude to Allaah Ta`ala, ‘This year was
my fifty-first anniversary and Alhamdulillah, in all this time, I
have never raised my tone when speaking to her.”
Some time later, Doctor Saheb’s wife commented,
“I do not
remember any time during my life where Doctor Saheb spoke to
me in an unpleasant tone, or that he ever asked me directly to
do any work for him. I would do things for him out of my own
will, but he never asked me to do it for him.”
Indeed the Qur`aan Majeed has assigned the mantle to men of
being the
Qawwaam
of women (i.e. they are the overseers and
protectors of women), however according to the Sunnat and
statements of Nabi (sallallahu alayhi wasallam) this does not
mean
that men, being the ‘guards’ over women should rule
them and treat them as servants and slaves. In another Aayat in
the Qur`aan Majeed, the relationship between husband and wife
is described as
Muwaddat
(friends), and in this Aayat the wife
has been described as the solace of the husband [Surah Room,
Aayat 21]
102
The essence of this entire discussion is that the relationship
between the spouses is one of love and friendship, where each
one finds solace and comfort in the other. However, in
accordance to Islaamic teachings, whenever a group pf persons
intend doing something collectively, then they should elect an
Ameer amongst themselves, who will be at the head of affairs.
To such an extent that even if there are only two persons
undertaking a journey, then it is better and preferable that one
of them be the Ameer, even though the two of them may be
good friends. The one who is chosen as Ameer is not a dictator,
rather he is like an administrator. He will see to the well-being
of his fellowmen and attend to their needs in a suitable manner.
When Islaamic teachings have prescribed this for a simple
matter like a journey, how much more important is it that this
be implemented in an important facet of life, namely, marriage.
In this regard, Islaam has elected the man to be the Ameer
amongst the spouses in their journey through life, where he will
attend to the needs of his family, in a kind and loving manner.
The man has the abilities and capabilities of this task by being
the stronger of the two in many respects, strength, intelligence,
etc. He is supposed to fulfil this task with kindness and mercy.
He is not to regard his subordinates as servants and slaves. He
should not hanker after his own rights, but rather see to it that
he fulfils the rights of his wife and children.
Both the spouses should attend to the rights of each other and
live amicably, which in turn will make their lives on earth a
heavenly sojourn. The Khutbah of the Nikah even stresses on
Taqwa for the partners and Doctor Saheb had also pointed out
that
Ihsaan
is to be implemented in our daily lives and not only
in acts of ibaadat.
Respected Husbands! You will only be able to lead a
successful married life if you conduct your life with
Ihsaan
and
103
fulfil the rights of your wife in an excellent manner. You
should also make an effort at encouraging your wife in
executing her Deeni tasks and responsibilities.
Do'stlaringiz bilan baham: 
