All praise is due only to Allaah. We laud Him and beseech His

He should take the time and consult experienced and 
learned Muftis.
He should make notes of relevant 
points and masaa’il and learn the relative points and 
factors regarding dealing and living with his wife. He 
should study the literature of notable Ulama on the 
subject and learn how to conduct his life in accordance 
to the Sunnat. If he encounters any confusion on any 
part of the books, he should make a note thereof and 
consult reputable Ulama to seek clarification. 
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2. 
The second thing he should do is to seek guidance 
and ease from Allaah Ta`ala by making dua. 
Together with this, he should consult some 
intelligent and mature married friend or family 
relative
and learn about how to lead a proper Islaamic 
married life. He should keep going to this person, but 
rather consult with him once or twice and try to 
ascertain all the facts. He should not go to all and 
sundry, because he will become more confused and 
disorientated. There is a famous saying which goes: 
“Too many cooks spoil the broth.”
Another disadvantage of seeking advice from too many people 
is that all these many people will later want to enquire what 
transpired and what the outcome of your proposal may be etc., 
etc., which will eventually lead to the entire affair becoming a 
theatre.
The best way is that which we have showed, which is to study a 
few relevant Kitaabs and keep them as reference. If you 
encounter any difficulty at any juncture, then seek its 
clarification from a reputable Mufti and confide and seek 
occasional advice from a close and trustable person, albeit a 
family member. 
By merely following this way, all fears and misapprehensions 
will disappear. Another fear some may have is whether they 
will be able to fulfil the conjugal rights the first night, or 
perhaps due to some other factor they may slip-up and this may 
lead to his bride confiding this to others, which will be an 
embarrassment. This is a futile and nonsensical thing to worry 
about. Such issues are natural occurrences and there is nothing 
to fear or be apprehensive about. The more relaxed and 

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to make such demands are contrary to the Shariah and 
impermissible. If the people refuse to heed the advice and 
persist in continuing in this practice, then such people should 
be ostracised and shunned, so that they may acquire some 
sense. If in every village and town, the youth band together and 
form an ‘anti-trousseau committee’, then this will have a great 
effect on the entire society and be a boon to all prospective 
brides. This will, Insha-Allaah Ta`ala bode well for the entire 
community. 
Not only with such an effort gain the pleasure of Allaah Ta`ala 
and His Rasool (sallallahu alaihi wasallam), it will also benefit 
entire societies as a whole and be a blessing for the Muslim 
community. May Allaah Ta`ala make these few lines a blessing 
for all and bring the desired intention to fruition. 
Nuptials 
We deem it imperative to mention an important factor at this 
juncture, that the prospective groom not get confuse himself 
prior to his Nikah by seeking and or taking the advice of a 
novice Aalim or inexperienced friends on this subject. He 
should carry out only the following: 
1.