All praise is due only to Allaah. We laud Him and beseech His

Perilous mistakes
Do not ever make the mistake of rebuking or fighting with your 
wife in front of the children. If you are very angry then it is best 
that you go away, but you should never, ever argue or 
reprimand your wife in front of the children. 

---

135
Arguing in front of the children is very bad for them. Just 
ponder and think what impression this will create in the young 
minds of your children when you and the wife constantly are at 
each others throats and at loggerheads, fighting and arguing 
about every small thing. The negativity of this scenario will 
impact on many generations to come. 
The children will grow up with this mindset and this type of 
interaction and mannerism will remain with them forever, and 
they will imagine this to be the way things are supposed to be 
in a home. The children will grow up insecure. They will then 
respond and reciprocate to the first person who offers them 
some sort of love and affection, which may be to their peril, 
thereby destroying both their worldly lives and hereafter. 
It is therefore imperative to abstain from reprimanding, 
rebuking and belittling your wife in the presence of others, 
even your own children. 
Another grave error
One other grave fault apparent in many men is that of anger. 
Anger is a disease which has many repercussions and causes 
untold damage, hurt and harm. Not only is anger destructive to 
the victims thereof, but it also affects the one who displays the 
anger. It increases the blood pressure and causes much harm to 
the body as well. A man who gives vent often to his anger 
strikes fear in his children and household. This is a grave ill 
which needs to be remedied. 
Our humble request is that husband not display anger in the 
homes. If you are such a person who has a short-temper, then 
you should make a concerted effort at swallowing your anger. 
Anger is the one Haraam thing which if swallowed will warrant 
reward. We will offer some secrets regarding this illness, which 
we hope will be practiced upon and accepted: 
136
1. 
Firstly you should learn the dua for entering the home. 
When you enter the house recite 
Authubillaahi Minash 
shaitaanir Rajeem Bismillah hir Rahmaan nir Raheem.
Recite 
Surah Ikhlaas and Durood Shareef and enter the home saying 
Salaam. Recite the dua whilst keeping in mind its meaning. The 
dua is: 
*ا ) و /و *ا ) ج1ا 2 و 3ا 2 456أ '!ا 7ا
آ. ر *ا ' و 2
 
“O Allaah! Indeed I ask of You the best when I enter and exit 
the home. We enter with the Name of Allaah and we exit with 
the Name of Allaah Ta`ala. And upon Allaah who is our Rabb, 
do we have trust.”
[Abu Dawood, page 339, vol. 2] 
Remember that duas are not only recited as a ritual. They have 
meaning and it is important that we keep in mind the meaning 
of the dua so that we know what we are asking for and 
protection from. 
2. 
Whenever you are angry then go and make wudhu. 
Wudhu will dispel your anger. The cool water will simmer 
down the heat of the anger and wudhu is an act which drives 
shaitaan away.
3. 
Nabi (sallallahu alayhi wasallam) said, 
“He who 
swallows his anger when he is able to extract revenge, Allaah 
Ta`ala will call him out on the Day of Qiyaamah in front of all 
the creation and reward him with any damsel of Jannat that he 
desires.”
[Tirmidhi, page 22, vol. 2 / Abu Dawood, page 33, 
vol. 2] 
4.
Besides this, it is stated in the Qur`aan Majeed, 
“And 
Jannat whose span extends beyond the earths and skies, is 
prepared for the Muttaqeen, those who spend in good and 
constrained conditions, and those who swallow their anger and 

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135
Arguing in front of the children is very bad for them. Just 
ponder and think what impression this will create in the young 
minds of your children when you and the wife constantly are at 
each others throats and at loggerheads, fighting and arguing 
about every small thing. The negativity of this scenario will 
impact on many generations to come. 
The children will grow up with this mindset and this type of 
interaction and mannerism will remain with them forever, and 
they will imagine this to be the way things are supposed to be 
in a home. The children will grow up insecure. They will then 
respond and reciprocate to the first person who offers them 
some sort of love and affection, which may be to their peril, 
thereby destroying both their worldly lives and hereafter. 
It is therefore imperative to abstain from reprimanding, 
rebuking and belittling your wife in the presence of others, 
even your own children.