After the quake blind willow, sleeping woman dance dance dance

That is, if the stairs aren’t blocked
, she thought, but she kept this thought to 
herself. 
“You were planning to climb these stairs from the beginning?” Tengo asked. 
“Right. If I could locate them.” 
“And you went to the trouble of dressing like that. Tight skirt, high heels. Not 
exactly the right outfit to wear to climb steep stairs.” 
Aomame smiled again. “I had to wear these clothes. Someday I’ll explain it to 
you.” 
“You have beautiful legs,” Tengo said. 
“You like them?” 
“You bet.” 
“Thanks,” Aomame said. On the narrow catwalk she reached up and gently kissed 
his ear. A crumpled, cauliflower-like ear. His ear was freezing cold. 
She turned back, proceeded along the catwalk, and began climbing up the narrow, 
steep stairs. Her feet were freezing, her fingertips numb. She was careful not to slip. 
She continued up the stairs, brushing away her hair as the wind whipped by. The 
freezing wind brought tears to her eyes. She held on tightly to the handrail so she 
could keep her balance in the swirling wind, and as she took one cautious step after 
another, she thought of Tengo right behind her. Of his large hand, and his freezing-
cold cauliflower ear. Of the 
little one
sleeping inside her. Of the black automatic 
pistol inside her shoulder bag. And the seven 9mm cartridges in the clip. 

---

797
We have to get out of this world. To do that I have to believe, from the bottom of 
my heart, that these stairs will lead to the expressway. I believe
, she told herself. She 
suddenly remembered something Leader had said on the stormy night, before he died. 
Lyrics to a song. She could recall them all, even now. 
It’s a Barnum and Bailey world
, 
Just as phony as it can be
, 
But it wouldn’t be make-believe
If you believed in me
. 
No matter what happens, no matter what I have to do, I have to make it real, not 
make-believe. No—the two of us, Tengo and I, have to do that. We have to make it 
real. We have to put our strength together, every last ounce of strength we possess. 
For our sake, and for the sake of this
little one. 
Aomame stopped on a landing halfway up and turned around. Tengo was still 
there. She reached out her hand, and Tengo took it. She felt the same warmth as 
before, and it gave her a certain strength. She reached up again and brought her mouth 
close to his ear. 
“You know, once I almost gave up my life for you,” she said. “Just a little more 
and I would have died. A couple of millimeters more. Do you believe me?” 
“I do,” Tengo said. 
“Will you tell me you believe it from the bottom of your heart?” 
“I believe it from the bottom of my heart,” Tengo replied. 
Aomame nodded, and let go of his hand. She faced forward and began climbing 
the stairs again. 
A few minutes later, she reached the top and came out onto Metropolitan Expressway 
No. 3. The stairway hadn’t been blocked. Before she scrambled over the metal fence, 
she reached up with the back of her hand and wiped away the cold tears in her eyes. 
Tengo looked around without saying a word. Finally, he said, as if impressed, “It’s 
Metropolitan Expressway No. 3. This is the exit out of this world, isn’t it.” 
“That’s right,” Aomame replied. “It’s the entrance and the exit.” 
Tengo helped her from behind as she clambered over the fence, her tight skirt 
riding up to her hips. Beyond the fence was a turnout just big enough for two cars. 
This was the third time she had been here. The large Esso billboard was right in front 
of her. 
Put a Tiger in Your Tank
. The same slogan. The same tiger. She stood there in 
her stocking feet without a word. She inhaled the car exhaust deep into her lungs. This 
was the most refreshing air she could possibly imagine.