After the quake blind willow, sleeping woman dance dance dance

CHAPTER 12 
Tengo 
MORE THAN I COULD COUNT 
ON MY FINGERS
Tengo managed to return to his apartment before the rains came. He hurried on foot 
from the station to his building. There was not a cloud to be seen in the evening sky, 
no sign that rain was on its way, no suggestion of coming thunder. None of the people 
around him was carrying an umbrella. It was the kind of pleasant late-summer 
evening that called for a draft beer at a baseball game. But he had recently entered a 
new frame of mind, and that was to assume that anything Fuka-Eri said might be true. 
Better to believe than not to believe
, Tengo thought, basing it not so much on logic as 
experience. 
He peeked into his mailbox to find a business envelope with no return address. He 
tore it open on the spot. Inside was a notice that 1,627,534 yen had been electronically 
transferred into his bank account. The payer was listed as “Office ERI,” which was 
almost certainly Komatsu’s fabricated company. Or possibly Professor Ebisuno had 
made the transfer. Komatsu had informed Tengo that he would be paid a part of the 
Air Chrysalis
royalties as an honorarium, and perhaps this was that “part.” No doubt 
the payment had been listed as an “assistance fee” or “research fee.” After checking 
the figure again, Tengo returned the notice to the envelope and stuffed it into his 
pocket. 
1.6 million yen was a lot of money to Tengo (in fact, he had never received such a 
lump sum in his life), but he felt neither happy nor surprised. Money was not a major 
problem for him at this point in time. He had his regular income, which enabled him 
to get by without undue strain, and for the moment, at least, he had no anxiety about 
his future. In spite of that, everyone wanted to give him large chunks of money. It was 
a strange world. 
Where the rewriting of 
Air Chrysalis
was concerned, however, Tengo had a 
sneaking suspicion that 1.6 million yen was not sufficient recompense for his having 
been drawn into 
this much
trouble. If, on the other hand, someone were to ask him 
straight out, “All right, then, how much 
would
be a fair amount?,” he would have 
been hard-pressed to come up with a figure. First of all, he did not know if there was 
such a thing as a fair price for trouble. There must surely be many different kinds of 
trouble in the world for which there was no way to attach a price or for which there 
was no one willing to pay. 
Air Chrysalis
was still selling well, apparently, which 
meant that there might be further payments into his account, but the more the deposits 
increased, the more problems they would give rise to. Each increase in compensation 

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only served to increase the extent of Tengo’s involvement with 
Air Chrysalis
as an 
established fact. 
He thought about sending the money back to Komatsu first thing tomorrow 
morning. That would enable him to evade some sort of responsibility. It might also 
provide some psychological relief. In any case it would establish the fact that he had 
rejected compensation. Not that it would expunge his moral responsibility or justify 
the actions he had taken. All it would give him was “possible extenuating 
circumstances,” though it might end up doing just the opposite by making his actions 
appear all the more suspicious, as though he had returned the money because he felt 
guilty about it. 
As he went on agonizing about the money, his head started to hurt, so he decided 
to stop. He could think about it again later, when he had time to spare. Money was not 
a living thing. It wouldn’t run off anywhere if he left it alone. Probably. 
The problem I have to deal with now is how to give my life a new start
, Tengo thought 
as he climbed the three flights of stairs to his apartment. Having gone to see his father 
at the southern tip of the Boso Peninsula, he had become generally convinced that the 
man was not his real father. He felt he had also succeeded in reaching a turning point 
in his life. It might be the perfect opportunity. Now might be a good time to make a 
break with all his troubles and start his life over again: a new job, a new place, new 
relationships. Though not yet entirely confident, he had a kind of presentiment that he 
might be able to lead a somewhat more coherent life than he had so far. 
Before he could do that, however, there were things he had to take care of. He 
couldn’t simply shrug off Fuka-Eri and Komatsu and Professor Ebisuno and disappear 
somewhere. Of course, he had no obligations toward them, no ethical responsibilities. 
As Ushikawa had said, where this current matter was concerned, Tengo was the one 
being put upon by them. Still, though he could claim to have been all but dragged into 
the situation and to have been ignorant of its underlying plot, the fact was that he had 
still been involved. He couldn’t simply announce that he would have nothing more to 
do with it and that the others could do as they pleased. Wherever he might go from 
here on out, he wanted first to bring things to some sort of conclusion and clean up his 
personal affairs. Otherwise, his fresh new life might be tainted from the outset. 
“Tainted” reminded Tengo of Ushikawa. 
Ushikawa, huh?
Tengo thought with a 
sigh. Ushikawa had his hands on some information regarding Tengo’s mother, 
information that he said he could share with Tengo.