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CHAPTER 17
Aomame
WHETHER WE ARE HAPPY OR UNHAPPY
Aomame stepped out onto her balcony again the next night to find that there were still
two moons in the sky. The big one was the normal moon. It wore a mysterious white
coating, as if it had just burrowed its way there through a mountain of ash, but aside
from that it was the same old moon she was used to seeing, the moon that Neil
Armstrong marked with a first small step but giant leap in that hot summer of 1969.
Hanging next to it was a small, green, lopsided moon, nestled shyly by the big moon
like an inferior child.
There must be something wrong with my mind
, Aomame thought.
There has
always been only one moon, and there should only be one now. If the number of
moons had suddenly increased to two, it should have caused some actual changes to
life on earth. The tides, say, should have been seriously altered, and everyone would
be talking about it. I couldn’t possibly have failed to notice it until now. This is
different from just happening to miss some articles in the paper
.
Or is it really so different? Can I declare that with one hundred percent certainty?
Aomame scowled for a time.
Strange things keep happening around me these days.
The world is moving ahead on its own without my being aware of it, as if we’re
playing a game in which everybody else can move only when I have my eyes closed.
Then it might not be so strange for there to be two moons hanging in the sky side by
side. Perhaps, at some point when my mind was sleeping, the little one happened
along from somewhere in space and decided to settle into the earth’s gravitational
field, looking like a distant cousin of the moon
.
Police officers were issued new uniforms and new pistols. The police and a radical
group staged a wild gun battle in the mountains of Yamanashi. These things occurred
without my being aware of them. There was also a news report that the U.S. and the
USSR jointly constructed a moon base. Could there be some connection between that
and the increase in the number of moons?
Aomame probed her memory to see if there
had been an article about the new moon in the compact edition of the newspaper she
read in the library, but could think of nothing.
She wished that she could ask someone about these things, but she had no idea
whom to ask nor how to go about it. Would it be all right for her just to say, “Hey, I
think there are two moons in the sky. Do you mind having a look for me?” No, it
would be a stupid question under any circumstances. If the number of moons had in
fact increased to two, it would be strange for her not to know that. If there was still
only the one moon, people would think she had gone crazy.
190
She lowered herself into the aluminum chair, resting her feet on the balcony
railing. She thought of ten different ways of asking the question, and some she even
tried out loud, but they all sounded as stupid as the first.
Oh, what the hell. The whole
situation defies common sense. There’s no way to come up with a sensible question
about it, obviously
.
She decided to shelve the question of the second moon for the time being.
I’ll just
wait and see what happens. It’s not causing me any practical problems for now. And
maybe at some point I’ll notice that it disappeared when I wasn’t looking
.
She went to the sports club in Hiroo the following afternoon, taught two martial arts
classes, and had one private lesson. Stopping by the front desk, she was surprised to
find a message for her from the dowager in Azabu, asking her to call when she was
free.
Tamaru answered the phone as always. He explained that the dowager wondered if
Aomame could come to the house the following day if possible. She wanted the usual
program, to be followed by a light supper.
Aomame said she could come after four and that she would be delighted to join the
dowager for supper. Tamaru confirmed the appointment, but before he could hang up,
Aomame asked him if he had seen the moon lately.
“The moon?” Tamaru asked. “You mean the moon—up in the sky?”
“Yes, the moon.”
“I can’t say I recall consciously looking at it recently. Is something going on with
the moon?”
“Nothing special,” Aomame said. “All right, see you after four tomorrow.”
Tamaru hesitated a moment before hanging up.
There were two moons again that night, both two days past full. Aomame had a glass
of brandy in one hand as she stared at the pair of moons, big and small, as if at an
unsolvable puzzle. The more she looked, the more enigmatic the combination felt to
her. If only she could ask the moon directly, “How did you suddenly come by this
little green companion of yours?”! But the moon would not favor her with a reply.
The moon had been observing the earth close-up longer than anyone. It must have
witnessed all of the phenomena occurring—and all of the acts carried out—on this
earth. But the moon remained silent; it told no stories. All it did was embrace the
heavy past with cool, measured detachment. On the moon there was neither air nor
wind. Its vacuum was perfect for preserving memories unscathed. No one could
unlock the heart of the moon. Aomame raised her glass to the moon and asked, “Have
you gone to bed with someone in your arms lately?”
The moon did not answer.
“Do you have any friends?” she asked.
The moon did not answer.
“Don’t you get tired of always playing it cool?”
The moon did not answer.
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Tamaru met her at the front door as always. “I saw the moon last night!” he said
immediately.
“Oh, really?” Aomame said.
“Thanks to you, I started wondering about it. I hadn’t stopped and looked at the
moon in quite a while. It’s nice. Very calming.”
“Were you with a lover?”
“Exactly,” Tamaru said, tapping the side of his nose. “Is something up with the
moon?”
“Not at all,” Aomame said, then added cautiously, “It’s just that, I don’t know, I’ve
been
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