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Fine. I’ve kept my cool so far
.
Coming out of the powder room, Aomame found Buzzcut standing at attention with
his back to her, speaking at low volume into a telephone. When he saw her, he cut his
call short, quietly hung up the receiver, and gave her a once-over in her jersey outfit.
“All set?” he asked.
“Whenever you are,” Aomame said.
“First I have a request to make,” Buzzcut said.
Aomame gave him a token smile.
“That you not say a word about tonight to anyone,” Buzzcut said. He paused a
moment so that his message could sink in. It was as if he had scattered water on dry
earth and was waiting for it to be absorbed and disappear. She watched him the whole
time without saying anything.
Buzzcut continued, “Pardon me if this sounds crass, but we are planning to offer
you generous remuneration, and we may be requesting your services from time to
time in the future. So we would like to ask you to forget anything and everything that
happens here tonight. Whatever you see or hear. Everything.”
“As you know,” Aomame said, adopting a somewhat frosty tone, “my work
involves people’s bodies, so I believe I am well versed in the ways of professional
confidentiality. No information of any kind regarding an individual’s body will leave
this room. If that is what concerns you, I can assure you there is no need to worry.”
“Excellent. That is what we wanted to hear,” Buzzcut said. “But let me just add
that we would appreciate it if you would view this as a case that goes beyond
professional confidentiality in the most general sense. Where you are about to set foot
is, so to speak, a sacred space.”
“A sacred space?”
“It may sound a bit much, but, believe me, it is no exaggeration. The one you are
about to lay eyes on, and to place your hands upon, is a sacred person. There is no
other appropriate way to put it.”
Aomame nodded, saying nothing. This was no time for remarks from her.
348
Buzzcut said, “We took the liberty of running a background check on you. I hope
you’re not offended, but it was something we had to do. We have our reasons for
taking every precaution.”
Aomame stole a glance at Ponytail as she listened. He was sitting motionless in a
chair beside the door, his back perfectly straight, hands on his knees, chin pulled
back. He could have been posing for a photo. His eyes were locked on her the whole
time.
Buzzcut looked down at his feet as if to check how worn out his black shoes might
be, then raised his face and looked at Aomame again. “In short, we found no
problems, which is why we have asked you to come today. You have a reputation as a
talented instructor, and in fact people think very highly of you.”
“Thank you very much,” Aomame said.
“I understand you used to be a Society of Witnesses believer. Is that true?”
“Yes, it is. Both of my parents were believers, and they naturally made me one,
too, from the time I was born. I didn’t choose it for myself, and I left the religion a
long time ago.”
I wonder if their investigation turned up the fact that Ayumi and I used to go out
man hunting in Roppongi? Oh well, it doesn’t make any difference. If they did find
out, it obviously didn’t bother them. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be here now
.
“We know about that, too,” Buzzcut said. “But you did live in faith at one time in
your life—that especially impressionable time of early childhood. So I assume you
have a good idea what I mean when I speak of something as ‘sacred.’ In any religion,
the sacred lies at the very root of faith. We must never tread upon that world. There is
a sacred region into which we dare not stray. The first step of all faith is to recognize
its existence, accept it, and revere it absolutely. You do understand what I am trying
to say, don’t you?”
“I think so,” Aomame said, “though whether I accept it or not is another matter.”
“Of course,” Buzzcut said. “Of course there is no need for you to accept it. It is our
faith, not yours. But, transcending the question of belief or nonbelief, you are likely to
witness special things—a being who is by no means ordinary.”
Aomame kept silent.
A being who is by no means ordinary
.
Buzzcut narrowed his eyes for a time, gauging the meaning of Aomame’s silence.
Then, speaking unhurriedly, he said, “Whatever you happen to witness today, you
must not mention it to anyone on the outside. For that would cause an ineradicable
defilement of the holiness, as if a clear, beautiful pond were polluted by a foreign
body. Whatever the world at large might think, or the laws of this world might
stipulate, that is how we feel about it. If we can count on you, and if you will keep
your promise, we can, as I said before, provide you with generous remuneration.”
“I see,” Aomame said.
“We are a small religious body, but we have strong hearts and long arms,” Buzzcut
said.
You have long arms
, Aomame thought.
I guess I’ll be testing to find out just how
long they are
.
Leaning against the desk with his arms folded, Buzzcut studied Aomame, as if
checking to see whether a picture hanging on the wall was crooked or straight.
Ponytail remained motionless, never once taking his eyes off of Aomame.
349
Buzzcut checked his watch.
“Let’s go, then,” he said. He cleared his throat once, then moved slowly across the
room with the careful steps of a pilgrim crossing the surface of a lake. He gave two
soft knocks on the door to the connecting room and, without waiting for a response,
pulled the door open, gave a slight bow, and entered. Aomame followed, carrying the
gym bag. Sinking step after careful step into the deep carpet, she made sure that her
breathing was under control. Her finger was cocked and ready to pull the trigger of
the pistol in her imagination.
Nothing to worry about. I’m the same as always
. But
still, Aomame was afraid. A chunk of ice was stuck to her spine—ice that showed no
sign of melting.
I’m cool, calm, and—deep down—afraid
.
We must never tread upon that world. There is a sacred region into which we dare
not stray
, Buzzcut had said. Aomame knew what he meant by that. She herself had
once lived in a world that placed such a region at its core.
In fact, I might still be
living in that world. I just may not be aware of it
.
Aomame soundlessly repeated the words of her prayer with her lips. Then she took
one deep breath, made up her mind, and walked into the next room.
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